CHAPTER 232: WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN

[ Autumn’s fortress/sanctuary - uncharted parts of the Old World ]

Autumn smoothed Jasper’s blanket, her fingers lingering as though tucking him in could ward off every shadow that threatened their fragile peace.

His chest rose and fell in steady rhythm, lashes dark against his soft cherub cheeks.

She bent low, pressing a kiss to his warm forehead. "Sleep well, little wolf," she whispered, her voice cracking into something almost prayerful.

When she straightened, her own breath left her in a long sigh.

Her shoulders sagged as though she carried the weight of the whole world on her spine (which actually,she did) . For a moment, she only sat in silence, the indoor light flickering against the walls of her chamber.

Then, with a subtle flick of her wrist, the air before her shimmered. A small circle of bluish light rippled into view, no larger than her palm. It swirled like water disturbed by unseen currents, humming faintly, practically alive.

Autumn leaned forward, her eyes reflecting its glow. Her fingertips brushed the edge of the portal. "Let’s see how far you’ve gone now..."

The surface rippled, shifting into images.

The woman clad in white appeared with her luminous skin...her glow tinged with the same blue as the portal. She moved like moonlight as she slipped through shadows to deliver the ornate envelopes.

Autumn watched closely, whispering under her breath as each tribe received their summons. "The wolves... the witches... the ones in between or more..."

The messenger passed through unseen doors, slid past guarded watchtowers, placed the invitations on tables, on thresholds, in hands that would soon tremble with curiosity or dread.

Autumn’s lips curved faintly. "Good job. They will definitely come. They have to come."

The glow of the portal shifted again...her messenger was turning towards the Blackmoons.

Autumn’s hand froze halfway in the air. Her pulse skipped.

The name alone carved a hollow inside her.

The image in the portal blurred faintly as if the magic hesitated with her, waiting for her command.

Her throat tightened, and she whispered to herself...voice thin. "Do I... want them to accept? Or... do I..."

For a heartbeat, she let herself linger in the ache of memory.

Her hand trembled, and she clenched her fist to still it.

"No." She sat straighter, her eyes hardening. "No more hesitating. He means nothing to me. Nothing at all."

The words rang sharp, but her chest ached as though the lie weighed more than truth.

Autumn exhaled sharply, her fingers flicking again. The portal obeyed, its scene flipping like pages in a book.

But when it zoomed in, it was no longer the Blackmoon Colony.

Instead Autumn saw dark trees looming across the rippling surface. A wall of mist. The Great Woods?!

Her breath caught. She leaned closer, staring into that roiling veil as if it could stare back.

" Hhhmmm, let’s see what Kieran is doing at this hour in the woods..."

And the portal shimmered, holding the shadowed forest in its trembling light.

Autumn’s eyes narrowed as the scene sharpened.

The air around her shimmered with a faint hum, her magic straining to hold the portal steady as if it clashed with a similar power.

Then the image of Kieran lunged suddenly at something...before Autumn could make out,she saw his body colliding with Lyla’s.

"Watch it!" Lyla gasped, but the words never finished.

Both of them tumbled on the forest floor. Rolling over several feet...both looked like a mess of tangled limbs and frantic breaths.

Autumn’s pulse thudded in her ears.

Her lips parted soundlessly as she watched Lyla sprawled across Kieran.Her pale hand pressed against his chest, steadying herself...lingering a little too long... their faces so close to each other...

Autumn’s breath caught. "Why the fuck does it still sting? Why does it feel like a knife twisting inside me? Fuck me! "

She almost tore her gaze away...almost. But her power wouldn’t let her. She had to see more...

And then... A sound shattered the dark haze.

High pitched. Fragile. So achingly innocent.A baby’s scream.

"Ma...mma... Dada..."

The voice giggled through its tears.

"You came for me!"

Autumn’s whole body went rigid.

The bushes rustled, and out flew a blur of wild curls and chubby cheeks... a little girl, so small, so soft, yet blazing with boundless energy.

She cannonballed right into them, squealing as she toppled over Kieran and Lyla both,her tiny arms wrapping their necks.

"Mamma! Dada!" She rained sloppy kisses across their faces,her laughter bright and wild,as though the forest itself had birthed her joy.

Autumn’s lips curved before she realized.

A smile. Unbidden. Trembling.

Her eyes glassed over as she whispered,"So... this is his daughter with Lyla..."

Her throat bobbed."She is cute... isn’t she? Has his eyes too..."

The question left her mouth like smoke in the wind...meant for no one. No answer. Just her own heart, caving in.

The vision shifted.

Blue light seeped through the canopies, painting the trees in shimmering hues.

The three of them...Kieran, Lyla, and the little girl...looked up with awe, as the rays cascaded like blessings from above.

A messenger woman’s figure descended, looking almost ethereal, her robes flowing like water.

Her envoy. The bearer of her invitation.

Autumn’s fingers trembled. She flicked her wrist... and the portal snapped shut.

But the silence afterward was deafening.

She stood frozen in her chamber, breath ragged,as though she had been the one tumbling,as though she had been kissed and claimed by that little girl’s arms.

Autumn pressed her palms hard against her eyes.

"No...nope...not happening..." her voice cracked, raw."I am not crying. Definitely not."

But when she pulled her hands away,her fingertips glistened with the truth.

Her vision blurred as she sank into herself.

"If my little girl had lived..." Her chest heaved."She would be the same age. She would have smiled like that. She would have thrown herself into my arms with the same laugh..."

The sob clawed its way up, but Autumn bit it back until it burned.

Her shoulders shook, her nails digging into her chest.

"It’s useless," she whispered to the emptiness."Useless thinking about what could have been..."

Her knees nearly buckled as a stab of sheer pain lanced through her heart.

Autumn clutched her chest, gasping...

Raw.

Ugly.

Unrelenting.

The kind that echoed through bone and marrow...the kind that never truly left even when she pretended or wanted it to.