Alpha's Remorse After Her Death
Main Flame 132
Amber’s POV
My entire chest ached for Julian and his clear pain. His grief for his lost child was so clearly written all over his face, that I felt a sort of shared grief along with him. Perhaps it was because of the closeness I felt to him in this moment.
I couldn’t remember a time when he had ever been so vulnerable with me.
His words helped solve some mysteries I’d been wondering over, though also created a few more.
Olivia was clearly holding the death of her unborn baby over Julian’s head. But the question now was, why was he allowing this? Why had he bent to her over this for so long?
Then again, perhaps the answer was clear.
Julian was an Alpha, a man used to being in control. It was in his nature to take responsibility for everything, even the things he would truly have no control over.
Was this an instance like that? Where he simply internalized the loss of the child so poorly that he epted the me?
I wished I knew more of what happened. The story of how the baby was lost was a well–kept secret in the pack. There were whispers of a car crash, but no one dared confirm anything.
Instead, the pack simply mourned the child, the loss of an heir so young, they hadn’t yet been given life.
It was a tragedy, one that I was poorly equipped to help Julian deal with. Selfishly thankful, I had not experienced the loss of a child. I could only imagine the pain, and knew imagining wasn’t nearly as bad
as the actual losing.
Slowly, feeling close to Julian and wanting to offer himfort however I could, I lifted my hand and ced it, palm t on his chest, right over his chest.
He seemed surprised by my action, looking down at my hand on his chest with a dull sort of surprise.
I was surprised itoo/i. As angry as I was with Julian, and as hurt, I still feltpelled to try to help him through this however I could.
Inside, my wolf was pleased, enjoying the refreshed connection with Julian. The rest of me simply felt so much pityb… /b
How much he must be hurting.
As slowly, Julian lifted his own hand and ced it over mine on his chest. “Thank you,” he said.
“I wish I could do more,” I said, and meant it. If only I knew away to heal the pain of grief… But that was
one hurt I couldn’t cure as a Healer.
“This is enough,” he said. He closed his eyes for a moment, and licked his lips. When he opened his eyes again, there was fresh determination within them. “Amber, I-”
A knock sounded loudly on the door. Someone tried the handle, but finding the door locked, scoffed.
“Julian? Are you in there? Are you alright?” That was Olivia’s voice.
Whatever Julian had been about to say was lost forever, as the determination in his eyes shriveled up
and disappeared the instant we heard Olivia’s voice.
He lowered his hand, and I lowered mine.
“Thank you, again,” he said. “And I am sorry aboutst night.”
It was difficult to stay furious with him now that I had more understanding of what he was suffering
through, and the allegiance he felt he owed to Olivia, even if only to maintain their friendship.
I didn’t like it, but I understood it. With grief, everything was a little messy…
“And thank you for helping with my hand,” he said.
“No more crushing sses,” I told him, trying to lighten the mood.
He gave me a small smile, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “No promises.”
“Julian?”
After onest longing look between us, he sidestepped me and moved to the bathroom door. There, before he unlocked it, he looked back at me and saw how I hadn’t moved to follow him.
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