CHAPTER 189: THE WEEK-LONG BREAK [8]

"Mmn!"

A soft sound escaped her throat.

Her hands pressed against his chest and tried to push him away.

But there was no strength behind it.

Her fingers curled into his shirt instead, gripping the fabric.

Then her eyes fluttered closed.

Thump! Thump!

Her heart pounded so hard she could hear it in her ears.

Eventually, she leaned into the kiss.

Her grip on his shirt tightened. Pulled him closer rather than pushing him back.

Alaric’s arm tightened around her waist. He pulled her closer.

Away from the wall. Against him instead.

"Mmn!"

A soft sound escaped Selene’s lips.

Her hands released his shirt and shot upward, towards his head, fingers tangled in his hair, threading through the strands and gripping tight.

She pulled him closer and kissed him back with sudden intensity.

All the irritation from earlier, the frustration, the longing, faded away, poured into the kiss.

Her composure, that carefully maintained mask, completely shattered.

Alaric’s hands moved across her back. Tracing the curve of her spine through the fabric of her gown. Memorizing the shape of her.

Then, his fingers found the small of her back and pressed there.

She arched slightly into him.

Alaric deepened the kiss.

Tilted his head to find a better angle.

To savor the tase of her. The warmth. The way she responded to him.

His hand moved from the small of her back. Traveled upward along her spine.

His fingers found the first hook of her gown, brushed against the clasp and started to work it free—

"Wait."

Selene broke the kiss and pulled back.

Her breathing came heavy gasps.

Her eyes were glassy. Unfocused. Her lips were swollen. Reddened from the kiss.

"I..."

The word came out weak.

Her gaze dropped. Couldn’t meet his eyes anymore.

Her hands slid down from his hair and came to rest on his chest instead. Her fingers curled. Gripped there. Not pushing away. Not pulling closer.

Just holding.

Like she needed the anchor.

Her chest rose and fell rapidly. Each breath visible in the way her shoulders moved.

The candlelight caught the flush spreading across her cheeks. Down her neck. Disappearing beneath her collar.

"I can’t..." She swallowed hard.

Alaric stared at her for a long moment.

His eyes searched her face. Reading the conflict written there.

Then he nodded.

His hands moved and cupped her face gently. Thumbs brushing across her flushed cheeks.

"Okay."

He leaned in. Pressed his lips against her forehead.

Sigh!

Selene’s eyes closed. Her lashes brushed against her cheeks.

His lips lingered there for a heartbeat.

Then he pulled back. Released her face.

His hands dropped to his sides.

"I think I should go now."

He waited for her to remove her grip from his shirt.

Selene looked down. And bit her lip.

Eventually, her fingers loosened.

Alaric started to turn.

Then suddenly, her hands tightened again and she pulled him back toward her.

Rose up on her toes.

"Mmn!"

Her lips found his for a quick, brief peck that lasted barely a second.

Then she released him completely and stumbled back, spinning around so fast her dark hair whipped across her shoulders.

"Y-yeah. You should go now."

The words tumbled out, fast, flustered.

Her shoulders were rigid. Tense.

But her hand came up and pressed against her lips.

Like she could still feel the ghost of that kiss there.

Alaric stood there. Watching her back.

His lips curved slightly. He took a step toward the door.

Then another.

His hand found the handle.

Click!

He paused. Looked back over his shoulder.

Selene hadn’t moved. Still facing away.

"Good night, Selene."

Then he pulled the door open.

Stepped through.

Click!

It closed softly behind him.

Leaving Selene alone in the candlelit study.

She stood there for several long seconds. Frozen.

Then her knees buckled slightly.

She braced herself against the bookshelf. Both hands flat against the wood.

Her head dropped forward.

"What am I doing..."

The whisper barely carried in the empty room.

**********

Alaric moved through the hallway. His boots struck the floor in steady rhythm.

Tap! Tap!

The corridor was quieter now. Most of the manor had settled for the evening. Only a few servants still moved about their final duties.

He reached his door. Paused there for a moment.

His hand rested on the handle.

Then pushed it open.

He stepped inside. Pulled the door closed behind him.

Click!

The room was dim. A single lamp had been lit, probably by one of the maids. It cast warm, amber light across the familiar space.

His room. Unchanged since he’d left for the academy.

Alaric moved toward the bed. Started pulling at his shirt.

The fabric slid over his head. He tossed it aside carelessly. It landed somewhere on a chair.

His hands went to his belt. Unfastened it. Then his trousers.

They hit the floor.

He stepped out of them. Kicked them away with one foot.

He was in his undergarments now.

The cool air hit his bare torso. Made him more aware of the lingering heat still coursing through his body.

He dropped onto the bed.

The mattress gave under his weight.

He laid back, arms spreading slightly. Head sinking into the pillow.

His crimson eyes fixed on the ceiling. Stared at the wooden beams overhead.

Sigh!

His hand came up. Ruffled through his hair. Gripped the strands and tugged slightly.

Why did I do it?

He groaned. Low. Frustrated.

Both hands came up now. Covered his face. Rubbed roughly.

Why is it becoming so hard to remain sane?

His palms pressed against his eyes.

Fuck.

His hands dropped. Fell to rest on his chest.

His fingers drummed there once. Twice.

The ceiling stared back at him. Offered no answers.

Just silence and the quiet crackle of the lamp’s flame.

His hand moved to his face again. Dragged down slowly.

"This is going to be a problem," he muttered into the empty room.

The lamp flickered.

Outside, the manor settled deeper into night.

But sleep felt very far away.