Book 4, Chapter 55: Balin – It Takes Goooose to Tango

“We’ve been training for this for weeks if not months.” Starshine explained as they finished kitting up. She adjusted her mithril vambraces and chuckled. “Seems all we needed was a Pete shaped kick in the arse to actually go and do it.”

“Are we sure you don’t want the rest of us?” Raptor’s Respite’s archer, a beastess by the name Amelia asked. She was waxing her bowstring and doing some final checks on her fletching.

Balin looked over the temporary addition to their team. She wore simple and loose leather armor, though a faint gleam from the seams told of some basic Enchantments. She had a rather unique spotted pattern on her fur, and small horns atop her head that she’d ground down to help keep her agile.

“Aye,” Balin finally answered. “We’ve got a mage and more than enough frontline. A good ranged fighter is all we’re really missing. Yer other companions would just complicate things.”

“*Ahem*” Flowerpott said, raising his crossbow.

“A good ranged fighter,” Balin repeated.

“All the thanks I get,” Flowerpott muttered.

Raysdotter slapped him on the back. “Aww, you bring our expendable cannon fodder, and that’s more than enough, Flowy!”

Flowerpott glowered at her, and reached up to buff a spot on his newly re-made and greatly enhanced Manny the Mantis Golem. “Shh, shh, don’t listen to her. She’s just a rock-headed dwarf. You’re not expendable at all, my darling.”

Balin shivered as the glass golem twitched, its mandibles opening and closing as though in answer. This new Manny was at least twice as tall as the old one, standing well over three meters tall. Flowerpott’s new Specialization Ability, [Living Crystal Crafter], made his creations more agile and durable, allowing him to build larger creations than ever.

“So, do we trust this Val character?” Raysdotter asked. “I know he answered a bunch of questions under [Truespeech], but that doesn’t really mean anything.”

“Considering what’s at stake, I’d rather know what he’s doing than shut him out. If he’s the reason the kobolds haven’t hurt anyone, that’s pretty good.” Starshine said. “But I agree that I don’t fully trust him.”

Balin sighed. “I know Pete doesn’t either, though I think he’s a bit starstruck by the beaven. They really seemed to affect him.”

“Well, this dungeon is based on his subconscious. Maybe it’s something from his childhood?” Aishablue said.

Starshine thumped her breastplate. “Well, it’s our job ta protect Pete from danger, and Val definitely counts. So make sure ta keep on eye on ‘im. Now, Formation Six. Let’s go hunt a boss.”

—

Somehow the forest felt more foreboding than it had yesterday.

Perhaps it was the adrenaline, or maybe the dungeon itself knew what they were about, and sought to make their path more difficult.

Whatever the reason, they found their way blocked by far more monsters, and every step through the dense underbrush felt like a slog.

Thankfully, the beer herds and the punkey troops that they had to fight through honed their instincts to a razor’s edge, and Balin was almost thankful for it – but for the insults from the Punkeys.

He did not have a bald spot!!!

The Goooose was big, and left a fairly obvious trail through the forest, and they soon found their prey.

“I found it!” Flowerpott hissed, his eyes glassy. “It’s just upstream, munching on a bunch of those red fish whatevers.”

“Salmon,” Aishablue said, jumping to her feet. “If it’s hunting –”

“Then that’s the best time to hit it – a hunter is always off guard when they strike. Let’s move! Formation Five! Balin with me to the front, Manny and Ray circle around behind it. Amelia, you stick behind Aishablue and distract the Goooose if it tries to focus on her.”

“Got it!” The beastess declared, stepping up beside the gnomess.

“[Intermediate Stealth], [Minor Blessing: Nothingness], [Shadowcloak], [Encourage: Agility]!.” Raysdotter declared, and vanished into the forest ahead of them. Flowerpott motioned at Manny and muttered “[Imbue Spirit]”, and the giant glass mantis spun into smooth motion, following after the black-leather-clad cleric.

Balin felt his reaction time increase, and each step felt slightly lighter as he and Starshine got into formation at the head of their column.

They picked up speed as they jogged through the forest, doing their best to keep their volume down. Not that the mithril encased Starshine was exactly capable of subtle. They just had to hope that the roar of the river would keep the Goooose from picking up on their approach.

When they broke through the treeline, they were at a full sprint. They all activated their buffs at the same time, not bothering with announcing them. Their weapons all glowed golden, and Balin felt his body swell

as he activated [Heroic Moment]. It only lasted a short while, but he had two uses saved up, and he would probably need both of them for this fight.

This was the first time they’d gotten a good look at the Goooose and Balin had to tamp down a sudden surge of fear. It raised its head out of the river, a struggling fish in its mouth. It regarded them with the nonchalance of an apex predator before biting down with rows of jagged teeth and tearing the unfortunate salmon to pieces.

It was built quite similarly to a duck, with a long prehensile neck and razor sharp spurs set on black webbed feet. It flapped its brown and black wings, revealing sharp talons at the ends, and let out a warbling bellow.

Unlike a duck, it had a head more akin to some artist’s nightmare rendition of a deer. A long muzzle that ended in fat flapping frothing lips, and two whirling red eyes beneath a too-thick brow ridge made the creature look positively mad. It lifted its neck to full extension, towering even further above them, and shook its massive antlers, each easily thrice the size of a dwarf. A moose, Pete had called it.

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It let out a keeing cry between a moo and an oink, which rose in pitch and volume until the very rocks and water began to tremble around them. The water the Goooose stood in boiled as fish began to surface belly-up.

Balin felt a ringing in his head, followed by a pressure in between his ears, and blood dripped down his nose. His vision narrowed into a tunnel, and his knees began to buckle. Starshine actually fell to her knees, and Flowerpott collapsed, blood pouring out of his eyes and ears.

*Bing!*

*Bing!*

*Bing!*

In his ringing ears, he was barely able to hear Aishablue shout, “[Scouring Light]!” as he similarly activated [Rally].

*Bing!*

*Bing!*

*Bing!*

There was a pulse of searing light from the gnomess, which felt like it penetrated through his bones, and all of his negative conditions were ripped away. Just like that, the world snapped back into focus. Balin squared his feet, stepped away from the rattled Starshine, raised his shield and shouted, “Come at me, ya ugly beastie!”

The Goooose lowered its wicked horns and dug its toes into the riverbed, readying a charge. It honked once more, though at a much lower volume, as though declaring its intent to kill all these interlopers.

Which was the exact moment Raysdotter appeared beside it, standing atop Manny. She drilled her spear forward as Manny swung a sickle at the Goose’s neck. Blood fountained out over the river, staining it pink for a moment before the rapids swept it away. The Goooose roared once more, this time in pain as it reared back, Raysdotter’s spear stuck in its left eye. It stumbled and spasmed in the waist-deep water, causing Manny to lose its footing. The glass golem and Raysdotter were swept down into the water, quickly disappearing from sight. They emerged a short ways downstream, splashing about, trying to escape the water’s pull. The Goooose swept its remaining baleful eye down on them, raising its wings like a mantis and preparing to strike.

“Howsabout ya come and fight someone ‘yer own Strength, ya beastie! [Greater Challenge]!” Balin roared, and the Goooose’s head swung around to face him. It splashed out of the river, ignoring the two who had just injured it, its head swinging side to side hypnotically. Balin did his best to keep both the head and body in view, which saved his life as he brought his shield up just in time to block a wing as it swept in from a blind spot. Balin grunted as the strike drove him back a meter, but he didn’t fall or let go of his ringing shield.

But it gave enough space and time for the Goooose to ready a deadlier strike. It spread its wings to their full 10 meter span, blotting out the sun. It flapped once, then twice, each beat of its wings bringing up dust and loose stones.

“Behind me!” Balin roared. “[Shield Wall]!”

A translucent wall of energy snapped into place ahead of Balin and his companions jumped into the space behind him. At the same time, the Goooose flapped faster and faster, until a hurricane of wind and stone and water surged towards Balin. It crashed into his Ability, ripping trees out by the root and flinging boulders deep into the woods. Balin’s feet slowly slipped back in the mud, but he remained steady, an island in the midst of the storm.

As the hurricane passed, it revealed the Goooose. The monster gave another one of its odd honk-bellows, confused at seeing them still standing. It pulled its head back, blood spurting from the wound on its neck, and its antlers glowed.

Balin tried to bring his shield around to receive whatever the Goooose was about to throw at him, but his arm was numb from the earlier attack. His shield came up oh, so slowly. The Goooose’s horns sparked, and its neck shot forward.

“Now!” Starshine’s voice called from the side, and a full volley of arrows suddenly arced over Balin’s head to pepper the Gooose’s face. It bellowed once more, and the shining light on its antlers sputtered out as it stumbled back. At the same time, Starshine rocketed forward, screaming “[Unstoppable Charge]!” She hit the Goooose dead in the center of its breast, her massive momentum carrying the two of them back and down into the river. Raysdotter and Manny, who were struggling to get out of the chest-deep rushing water were barely able to jump out of the way as the boss and Starshine were swept into the rapids.

The Gooose raised its head above the water, gulping for breath, blood streaming from the spear stuck in its eye. It honked, and tried to right itself, looking about for Starshine.

But Aishablue didn’t give it a chance, as bright light lanced out from her outstretched wand. Burning white fire struck the Goooose in its remaining eye, and it howled with pain and rage. Its howl was met with an equally vicious scream from Starshine who rose out of the water, an unstoppable juggernaut of flowing metal. She grabbed hold of the Goooose’s antlers, and bore its head back under the water. The river churned as the Goooose and the dwarf struggled beneath the waves.

“Starshine needs help!” Raysdotter screamed, desperately trying to tread through the water to her friend.

“Focus!” Flowerpott screamed back, “[Remote Control]!”

Silver wings sprouted on the mantis golem’s back, and it burst from the water with a metallic buzz. The Goooose was barely able to reach its blubbering lips above the water before three meters of golem plowed into it and bore it back beneath the waves.

Balin and the rest of the party ran along the banks, trying to keep up as the rapids bore the struggling trio of mantis, monster, and maiden down the river. Every time the Goooose tried to raise its struggling head above the water it was met with arrows and a laser of flashing light. Its feet struggled to find purchase on the slippery rocks, and its wings churned the water in its desperate attempts for air.

And just as suddenly as it had begun, it was over.

The Goooose stopped struggling to breathe, its neck bobbing listlessly in the water. Its lifeless body eventually came to a rest, caught between two large rocks in the river. Starshine rose from the water, coughing and hacking. She splashed up to shore as the rest of her party ran up to her, clamoring and shouting for joy.

“And you all thought [Hold Breath] was a waste of an Ability.” Starshine gasped, then collapsed to the ground with a clatter of metal.

*Bing!*