CHAPTER 268: CHAPTER 267 - ARGON RETURNS WITH AN UPGRADE.

The Ashen Expanse cave was warm. Not cozy-warm—more like "shelter-from-the-nightmare-wasteland-outside" warm.

The kind of warmth that made the shadows dance along the stone walls while the faint crackle of a small fire gave the place a heartbeat.

And in that heartbeat, chaos lived.

"I’m telling you, Rufus, you’re doing it wrong."

Alex gestured with a walnut, as if it were a diplomatic treaty. "You can’t just crack it in one go. You gotta roll it around in your hand first and get it nice and loose."

Across from him, Rufus scowled. "No. That’s barbaric. You want the shell to split clean so you can get the meat in one piece."

Nibbles, seated between them like a tiny, judgmental referee, telekinetically lifted a nut, spun it mid-air, and cracked it perfectly without touching it.

Then he shoved it into his mouth with smug little chittering sounds.

Alex gasped. "See? He gets it! You play with the nut before you take it in your mouth."

Rufus snorted. "Only if you’re wasting time. I gobble it all in one go."

From across the cave, Selena glanced over, deadpan. "Are you two seriously having an argument that sounds like you’re talking about—"

"Don’t finish that sentence!" Clara called quickly.

Nibbles just made another chitter that was suspiciously close to a laugh.

Graye, meanwhile, was passed out near the fire, armor slightly askew, mouth open, a faint trail of drool threatening to escape.

Her arm was flung over the massive panther that had apparently decided she was a personal pillow.

The beast lay on its back, paws in the air, tongue lolling sideways in what could only be described as the pose of ultimate defeat.

The pair looked so ridiculous that even Jessy—sleeping a little distance away—twitched in her slumber like she was fighting the urge to laugh.

Jake, of course, was nowhere in sight.

Which was how they knew he was still doing his favorite thing: standing somewhere high, brooding in the dark, looking like a poster for a tragic action movie.

Cluckles sat atop a small rock, pecking methodically at something only it could see.

"Cluckles... is rebalancing the universe... one invisible worm at a time..." it murmured gravely, before suddenly whipping its head toward the wall and declaring, "The wall has... judged you. Cluckles approves."

Cluckles was always like that, so no one asked. No one ever asks.

At the center of it all, Raven sat cross-legged on a rock, flanked by Selena on one side and Clara on the other, both holding one of his hands like they were anchoring him in place.

Lia sat opposite, Planty on her lap, as she kept caressing it.

Siris was directly behind Raven, her knees brushing his back, fingers lazily twining through his hair as if she owned it.

Every few minutes, she would trace a word on his back and demand, "Guess what I wrote."

He never guessed right.

Mostly because he wasn’t trying.

After all, he was having a serious talk with Lia.

Selena and Clara were also listening in, but the absurdity of Alex and Rufus’s talk had taken their focus away for a second.

"...So," Raven said finally, gaze steady on Lia, "about your lifespan."

The princess’s lips pressed into a thin line. "...You don’t have to—"

"I’m going to," he cut in without room for argument. "I know ways to recover it. Maybe even more than recover. You’re not losing a single year. You don’t have to."

Yes, he wasn’t lying.

The moment Raven had found out that Lia’s ability could bring back a person to life by using her lifespan, he had thought of gathering some things that could help her replenish her lifeforce.

Lia’s eyes flicked down. "You... know ways?"

It wasn’t that she didn’t want it.

She wanted it more than anyone else could, but she didn’t want to burden Raven with it, so she kept smiling.

But now that she had heard that he could, her expression changed.

Raven noticed it, so he sighed, his voice softening. "I know many things from the plot, and one of those is a way to a paradise of mythical herbs."

Clara squeezed his hand. Selena’s eyes narrowed faintly, though her expression stayed calm.

Lia looked up into his eyes, her sadness reflecting in them.

She didn’t regret giving a hundred years of her life to save Raven. She would never rue over it.

But if there were a way to recover it, then she would gladly take it.

After all, she didn’t want to lose a hundred years of her possible life with Raven.

It was then that Siris drew another word on his back—probably ’stab’—and waited.

"Cheese?" He guessed dryly.

"...Close enough," she smirked.

Lia’s voice was small when she finally asked, "You’d do that... for me?"

"Of course," Raven said, his expression turning soft again. "You’re one of mine. That’s all there is to it."

For a moment, the cave seemed quieter.

Then Rufus, who had ended his discussion with Alex, broke it.

"Man, you should’ve seen the Hector soldiers when we brought Myria back. I swear, I thought one guy was about to break into interpretive dance."

Alex barked a laugh. "No, the best part was Commander Liora! She looked like she wanted to punch Raven and hug him at the same time."

Selena smirked faintly. "Punch? More like eat."

Then she turned toward Siris. "But thanks to a lesson from someone, she did neither."

"The soldiers had jumped in joy," Clara added with a smile. "All of them. It was... nice. Like everything Siris had done to them just vanished."

Lia chuckled softly. "That’s because Myria has that effect on people. She’s... a little star."

Siris leaned forward, chin resting on Raven’s shoulder. "Still not sure why they didn’t give us a reward."

Cluckles flared its scarf in indignation. "Cluckles considers emotional satisfaction to be the most worthless currency."

The conversation drifted then, back to joking, to teasing, to Alex and Rufus still arguing over "proper nut handling."

Lia stayed quiet, her eyes fixed on the fire, but the tightness in her shoulders was just a little less than before.

It was then that a faint shuffle of boots against stone broke through the hum of the cave.

The firelight caught a tall silhouette in the entrance—black hair falling in loose strands, red eyes sharp even in the half-light, and a massive sword strapped across his back like it belonged there more than gravity did.

Argon stepped in without ceremony, his gaze sweeping over them all.

He grunted. "You all look like you’ve just saved a kingdom or something."

Raven didn’t even blink. "You don’t say."

The edge in his tone earned him a sidelong glance from Selena and a barely suppressed snort from Alex.

Argon didn’t press. He strode further into the cave, letting the warmth settle over him, and then—completely out of nowhere—he said, "I’ve been working on some jokes. Thought you could tell me if they’re good or not."

Raven’s expression didn’t change, but his soul looked like it sighed.

"...Have you been training," he asked flatly, "or just making jokes?"

Argon ignored the jab entirely.

He planted himself by the fire, crossed his arms, and cleared his throat with all the gravity of a man about to deliver battlefield orders.

"Alright. First one."

He looked right at Rufus.

"Why don’t graveyards ever get overcrowded?"

Rufus frowned. "...Why?"

Argon’s mouth twitched into what might’ve been a smile.

"Because people are just dying to get in."

There was a pause.

Then, half the group groaned, half tried not to laugh, and Nibbles made a chittering noise that could’ve been either disgust or amusement.

Behind them, Graye stirred with a grunt, blinking blearily as the panther beside her gave a loud, slow yawn, baring teeth the size of a small dagger.

Graye tilted her head. "Father-in-law’s making jokes?"

Jessy shifted on her bedroll, muttering something incoherent before sitting up, her hair an impressive battlefield of tangles.

"...Did I just wake up to him telling... jokes?" She asked in disbelief.

"Yep," Raven replied.

"Okay," Argon said, undeterred, "next one. Why did the scarecrow win an award?"

Rufus rubbed his face. "Don’t—"

"Because he was outstanding in his field."

Selena closed her eyes like she’d just taken psychic damage.

Siris actually snorted.

Cluckles, entirely deadpan, announced, "Cluckles approves."

Argon’s eyes glittered with a dangerous confidence. "Third one. What do you call fake spaghetti?"

Jessy murmured it under her breath, already bracing. "...Oh no."

"An impasta."

This time, even Raven’s lips twitched—though he smothered it instantly.

Lia, despite herself, let out a quiet laugh.

Argon pointed at her like he’d just scored a victory. "That’s one. I’m keeping track."

The atmosphere in the cave had shifted—warm in a different way now, lighter.

Even Clara, who was normally hard to crack, was biting the inside of her cheek to keep from grinning.

Argon didn’t stop. He fired off a few more—each one delivered with the same ironclad seriousness he’d use to announce a battle plan.

"What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?"

"Nacho cheese."

"Why did the bicycle fall over?"

"It was two-tired."

By the end of it, they were all caught in the same strange limbo, stuck between wanting to laugh and wanting to tell him never to do it again.

Raven pinched the bridge of his nose. "...You’ve been... busy."

Argon sheathed an invisible mic with a smirk. "A warrior must train both blade and wit, son."

"...In that order," Raven muttered.

But he didn’t tell him to stop—no one else did either.

Because, for all the groaning and the head-shaking, it was nice.

Having Argon there—sword, scowl, and bad jokes alike—made the cave feel just a little more like home.