CHAPTER 75: WHY ARE YOU SO PALE?

"What... are those?"

Le An asked the lab worker who was now walking down the corridor with a rolling rack, just as he stepped out of his room. He had seen them from the bed, through the glass window facing the corridor, two outfits hanging on the rack.

They were most likely newly designed dungeon-type protective suits. The kind made for espers, not yet released on the market.

And Le An’s guess was right.

"Ah, T-Treasure, hello! These are new esper suits, um... Someone inside ordered them, to gift to their relatives."

Le An’s gaze lingered on the protective chest and abdomen guards of the esper suits, still wrapped in transparent packaging. They were covered with a thick layer of leather-like material. Most likely made from shock-absorbing fabric.

"They’re designed to reduce the chances of an esper being injured to a remarkable degree, much better even than the latest models... Do you like them?"

The lab worker spoke with nervous excitement, sweating a little as he babbled on. Le An had never spoken with him before, even if his face looked vaguely familiar. Who knew—maybe he was the child or relative of some big shot...

"I was also present during the test runs. So far, in close-range durability tests, this model scored the highest, haha."

Le An nodded. "They... look really good," he murmured. "The best gift you could ever give to an esper."

"Exactly!" the worker chirped. He held up one of the packages, turning it this way and that as he now explained how the material was both light and resilient.

Le An, however, only pretended to listen. His eyes silently followed the suits.

"This model... will be sold in limited production, Treasure. Not all espers will receive one. Um... If you really like them, I could gift these two to you."

For the first time, Le An raised his eyes, caught off guard. His irises gleamed faintly with desire. The worker scratched the back of his neck, cursing inwardly. How did I miss it? That look... so omega.

"For me? Ah..." Le An looked back and forth between the suits on the rack and the worker’s eyes. He had never expected it to be this easy. He had thought he would need to steal them, not just... be given them.

The worker, now fully determined to convince Treasure to accept his gift, pushed the rack closer. Treasure’s interest in the suits was obvious.

"Of course! I’ll explain it to my friend who originally wanted them. Once he hears I gave them to you, Treasure, he’ll understand. Please, take them..."

Le An reached out and held one of the suits, almost smiling as excitement flickered in him. The rigid texture pressed into his palm. He nodded. "Thank you."

The worker, flushed with the heat of giving Treasure a gift, grew even chattier. He pushed the rack into Le An’s room, leaving it beside the bed. Le An watched him, already thinking of a way to sneak the suits out of the house without drawing attention.

"Umm... you said they haven’t been released yet, right?"

"Yes, Treasure."

Tracker... After his unexpected proposal yesterday, Le An didn’t think Tracker would still be paying much attention to his belongings or incoming packages. But Theo... these days Theo seemed more alert than ever, as if...

As if he sensed that something was running through Le An’s mind.

Le An swallowed. "Then... no one should see these. I don’t want photos of them leaked before the model is released."

At first the worker didn’t quite understand, but then his gaze fell on the small suitcase on the floor. His lips parted, then he nodded vigorously. "You’re right. Shall I package them and hand them over to your guards?"

Le An nodded with a smile. "Yes, please."

"If you don’t mind me asking... Are they gifts, Treasure?"

When he asked, eyes curious, Le An nodded. "Yes."

"For Mr. Theo?" The worker was also an alpha. And Treasure’s name was always mentioned alongside only one alpha. Naturally, Theo came to his mind first, a dominant alpha.

Le An froze, caught off guard. Lowering his head, he gave a hesitant nod.

If he gave one suit to Theo, then maybe... he could hide the other without drawing suspicion.

"Put them both in the same package, please," Le An said.

The worker nodded without pressing further. He introduced himself quickly, shook Le An’s hand, then left the room with the rack.

---

Now holding the delivered package in his hands, Le An let out a quiet sigh. It had already been opened and checked, of course, that much he had expected.

In truth, he had wanted to give the second suit to Maxim. But since questions were already raised about why esper suits were delivered to his house, if both disappeared... it would only draw more suspicion.

"Sorry..." Le An murmured. He hugged one of the suits, then went to the cabinet in his room, where a safe was hidden. Entering the code, he opened it. The inside was nearly full. His cheeks puffed with a troubled breath.

He took everything out, folded the suit at the very bottom, then piled the rest back on top. The safe shut with a click.

It was time. That thing he had been thinking of writing for days... If nothing happened tonight, then tomorrow or the day after, Taras would move. Just as he had said.

"Ha..." Le An closed the cabinet door, leaning his forehead against it. He stayed like that for a long while.

For days now, even in the most absurd moments of the day, when his thoughts had wandered far away, there had always been that feeling of wanting to cry. His nose would sting, his eyes would burn. And now he wasn’t even sure if he could truly carry out the end he had chosen for himself.

Maybe it was foolish to think of himself as someone still capable of making choices, someone still able to escape his fate. Maybe all of this was pointless. Maybe he would be caught and neutralized before even carrying out his plan.

But still... it was worth trying.

Le An swallowed and picked up the other suit from the package. He opened the door and went downstairs.

Downstairs, the atmosphere was chaos. Just like in the rest of the country, just like in every street.

Opposition figures were being arrested one after another, companies were being seized, and official statements spoke of "doing everything to eliminate the terrorists." Since the attacks after that grand party, nearly a hundred people had lost their lives.

The government blamed foreign forces one day, the opposition the next—always searching for an explanation the public would believe. But people were exhausted. Angry. Protests had broken out. More and more voices were demanding resignations. A government that couldn’t prevent attacks and couldn’t protect its citizens had no right to stand.

"Le An, the GAC decided to station another unit of military guards around the house. They’ll also build additional security structures onto the house plan."

Theo climbed the steps Le An had half-descended and came to stand beside him.

Le An now looked out at the crowded living room, filled with soldiers, espers, and house staff. He bit his lip and nodded. Then his gaze met Tracker’s, who was leaning against the wall.

Tracker glanced at the crowd, then back at Le An, his expression heavy with concern.

And Le An understood the question in his eyes.

How will you escape?

My child...

The noise pressed against his ears. His eyes grew troubled, but he turned away. Facing Theo instead.

Theo, too, turned from Tracker and looked directly at Le An. Then his gaze dropped to the suit in Le An’s arms. "I was just about to ask you the same thing. Where did you get that?"

Le An hugged the heavy suit tighter against his chest. Then, almost like a forced choice, he pushed it into Theo’s arms and... smiled.

Even now, leaving something to Theo still warmed his chest with a quiet heat. Because when all of this chaos swallowed his home, his people, and his country, Theo was still one of those he wished safety for. "It’s the newest model... for you."

The guarded expression on Theo’s face crumbled like a sandcastle. His eyes filled, not first with the joy of receiving a gift, but with shock, disbelief, sorrow, and gratitude. "Le An..."

"You can’t wear it until it’s released..." Le An placed the suit fully into his arms, smiling, meeting Theo’s gaze as if to encourage him to smile too. As if to say: it’s okay. "But after that, you must wear it. Promise?"

Theo draped the suit over one arm like it was a cloak, then with the other he pulled Le An into his embrace. His lips parted near Le An’s neck, cautious, hesitant. "Thank you, Le An. Truly."

"It’s nothing," Le An whispered, only holding onto Theo’s shirt. Just faintly, he returned the hug. But in Theo’s voice, in his stance, he felt the man’s excitement.

Theo could hardly be blamed. Le An had given him something that would protect him. Of course Theo would see this as a new beginning.

Le An released his grip, flattening his palm against Theo’s back, just to feel his warmth. That crying urge swelled again, threatening to consume him. But this wasn’t a beginning, he thought. It was the opposite.

It wasn’t even a long hug. But when their bodies parted, a faint ache still lingered in Le An’s chest and arms.

"Then I must give you something too," Theo said with a smile.

Le An nodded, forcing a smile with the last of his will. His lips trembled, as if they could no longer hold that expression.

But Theo didn’t notice. He sent Le An to his room to rest, then went back downstairs.

---

The next few hours passed with Le An curled up on his bed, legs drawn to his chest, turning his plan over and over in his mind.

He stared at his palm. From downstairs came shouts, sometimes rising, then immediately quieting—as if hushed quickly, so he wouldn’t be disturbed.

Wrapped in cotton, sheltered all his life, he had always known this day would come. The day when all of it would suffocate him.

His existence had become unbearable. First for himself, then for others. Then painful. Then destructive. Then something that darkened people’s lives.

Le An clenched his fist.

Like an extreme value in a table of statistics, he was the outlier. Among all the guiders, it was Le An. Among all the citizens, it was that handful of the wealthy elite. The ones who ruined the balance. The ones who pushed everything into misery.

The noise downstairs grew louder. Large vehicles pulled up outside. The ground trembled with a sudden jolt. Bam!

The rumble continued in the house. But Le An realized that sound wasn’t from inside—it was coming from outside. Bam!

He hurried to the window. At first, he couldn’t make sense of what he saw. Then he recognized the large concrete-like blocks being lowered one by one into the garden. By an esper with kinesthesia powers.

The esper slowly placed the third block down. Right in front of the dwarf apple tree that Le An had helped prune with the gardener weeks ago. Bam!

One branch was caught under the block and snapped off the trunk with a crack.

Le An stared at the broken branch trapped beneath the weight. People turned in panic, looking toward the window, toward him. Their eyes met.

The people looked at him from outside, their gazes blank, even though the window revealed nothing from within. And Le An, too, stepped back from the glass, unsure what he should feel.

Even his garden was now being swallowed by this chaos.

Le An’s mind thrashed with silent grief, like muffled cries beneath water.

All this turmoil wasn’t just an obstacle. It was also an opportunity.

"Tomorrow..." Le An whispered. His heart pounded, shaking his whole body with fear. He shook his head. Yes...

He pulled out a piece of paper, a pen, and an envelope. As if only words could hold him together when everything else was falling apart, he began writing everything he wanted to say.

A tear formed at the corner of his eye, rolled down his nose, and dropped onto the page. Le An flinched, as if waking from a trance.

His last sentence now stood out in his mind, too real, too... personal. And yes, it was. It was something he would never have the courage to say aloud.

He wanted to cross it out. But the paper already felt untouchable, sacred because of what he had written. He couldn’t bring himself to.

And yet... he couldn’t leave that sentence there either. If he failed...

"Ugh..." He pressed both hands to his face, every sound around him numbing his thoughts, drowning him in helplessness.

Finally, he scratched the sentence out. Because when he thought about it, these words only mattered in his heart. To the person who might read them, they wouldn’t mean the same.

Le An gripped the pen tighter. After writing a few more lines, he pressed his hand against his chest and took a deep breath.

He wanted to see him. He wanted him to read this letter, and at the very least... feel something. Anything. Something other than hate or pity.

"At least... just a little," Le An whispered. He folded the paper, slid it into the envelope, and sealed it.

As he tucked the envelope into the safe, his gaze fell on the endemic plant on the desk.

He brushed his thumb across a petal. Gently plucked it. Placed it inside the envelope with care.

Everything he did might have been foolish, selfish, childish. But at least... he was trying to compensate for the harm of his existence, even just a little.

There was only one thing left. The one thing he had to leave behind. The one thing he knew would please him.

Le An opened another cabinet, pulled out a few small tubes and materials, and headed to the bathroom.

He would handle this on his own.

---

"Treasure,"

"Hey, Treasure, wake up."

"Why didn’t you wait for me? Was it because I didn’t come for a few days... hm?"

"Why are you so pale..."

"Wake up!"

Le An jolted awake at the hands gripping his shoulders. Darkness pressed in, so deep he couldn’t see anything. A small whimper slipped past his lips.

"Look at me. You...?"

Slowly, eyes glowing faintly in the dark became visible. Hands pulled Le An up, leaning him against a warm body. Recognition struck. "...Taras?"

"Why is your body so cold... Hey!"

Le An flinched when a finger suddenly pressed between his lips. He instinctively grabbed Taras’s wrist.

Taras rubbed his palm hard against Le An’s arms and neck, trying to warm him.

It took only a moment for Le An to realize why Taras’s finger stayed at his mouth, because his teeth were chattering so hard. To stop them from clashing.

"S-so cold... hhn, huu..." Le An mumbled around Taras’s finger.

Taras watched his face, then pulled him fully into his arms and lay back with him. "Come here."

He held him tight, covering every inch of Le An’s trembling body.

Le An’s skin was... bluish. His scent drove Taras half-mad, it smelled like blood. He buried his nose against Le An’s neck, desperate for his real scent.

Yes, he had to be mistaken. Le An wasn’t bleeding. But he was sick.

"Ugh, I’m fine..." Le An whispered, head pressed into Taras’s chest, muffled under the blanket.

Taras stared blankly at the ceiling, his fingertips trembling as if bitten by frost.