bChapter /bb168 /b

ADRIAN’S POV

“And that’s what I’m trying to get you to see, Adrian. It’s not healthy for you and deep down, you know it,” James said, his voice filled with ba /bmix of

frustration and concern.

bI /bsat motionless at the edge of the bed, my fingers loosely gripping the rim of the sheets. My eyes were really aching meb, /band if not for the curtains and my shades, shielding me from the outside world–something I had grown used to, headaches were my next route. I didn’t answer him immediately. The silence stretched between us, heavy and ufortable.

“I deserve it,” I said eventually, my voice t, almost lifeless. “The way I treated people who genuinely cared about me… how I pushed them away, all because I was drowning in hate and anger. I deserve everything that’s happening to me now.i” /i

There was no hope in my tone. Just resignation. I wasn’t looking for pity or a pep talk. I was just stating what I believed to be true.

James exhaled sharply. “It’s been five fucking years, man. Five. Are you nning to hold on to this guilt until you’re old and grey? Because from where I’m standing, you’re already halfway there.”

I didn’t respond.

Because I didn’t know.

I didn’t know when I’d be “myself” again–hell, I didn’t even know who that was anymore. Each day blurred into the next. My life had be a series of numb routines and hollow distractions. The pain hadn’t gone away; I had just grown familiar with it.

James continued, stepping closer. “You know, if everyone had your mindset–if everyone locked themselves away from the world because of one mistake they couldn’t take back–the streets would be empty. We’d all be hiding in the dark.”

I let out a slow, tired sigh. His words lingered in the air, piercing the armor I had spent years building around myself. He wasn’tpletely wrong. Maybeb, /bit was time to try harder. To stop using the past as a prison and start looking for a way out–even if I had to crawl.

Maybe it was time to fight for myself.

I slowly reached up and took off my sunsses. My eyesb, /bbloodshot from sleepless nights and too many bottles of wine, met his for the first time since he

walked in.

“You’re right,” I said quietly, the admission tasting strange on my tongue. I straightened up and leaned back against the bedframe.

James blinked, clearly surprised. His eyebrows shot up. “Wait…really?i” /i

Without answering, I pushed myself to my feet and shrugged off the night robe I had worn like armor for the past few days maybe longer. The fabric hit the ground with a soft thud, and I felt oddly lighter.

I walked over to the window, paused for a moment, then pulled the curtains open. Sunlight flooded the room, warm and blinding. I winced at first, my eyes unused to the brightness, but I didn’t close them again.

The light felt real. Almost healing.

“I’m not saying I can forget everything that’s happened in thest five years,” I said, my voice steadier now as I turned to face him. “But I’ll try. All iof /ithis– me rotting in this room–it was just an excuse. I’ll work on leaving the past behind me. I owe that much to myself… and to the people I pushed away.”

I took a step closer to James.

“That’s more like it. That’s the man I know,” James said, a grin forming on his face as he stepped closer and ced a firm hand on my shoulder. “To be honest, I didn’t think you were going to change your mind about this, but I’m happy you finally saw things from my point of view.”

I gave a small, amused huff.

10:23 Sun 29 Jun “

bChapter /bb168 /b

b“/bbNow/bb, /bbI /bbsaid /bI bwas /bgoing to leave the past behind me, I replied, brushing his hand off my shoulder with a cats but cleat motion, “tut Hosur ment bgoing /bbto /bstart epting blind dates, so don’t get any ideas.

James chuckled, but I could hear the persistence building in his tone before he even opened his mouth.

“Come on, let’s not argue about this too,” he said. “Dora lied to you I get it. She was maniptive, but that doesn’t mean every other bwoman /bbis /blike her You can’t shut everyone out because of one bad apple.”

I didn’t bother responding. I simply turned around and began picking up the scattered clothes that littered the floor. Shirts, jackets, even ties I bhadn/bb‘ /bwom in months—all signs of a man who’d let himself go and stopped caring. I needed to change, yes. But not everything was on the table for bchange /b

James wasn’t done.

“This is the same thing that made you miss out on Olivia,” he said, his voice quieter now, as though walking a line between reminding and provoking “You blocked your heart, man. You refused to see what was right in front of you. And now you want to do the same thing all over again.”

I paused, gripping one of the shirts tighter in my hand before tossing it into theundry basket.

“I’m not a child,” I said without turning around. “It’s my life. And I’ll live it however the hell I please.”

“Exactly. You’re not a kid,” James countered, bending down to help me. “You’re getting older, Adrian. iYou /ineed stability. You need a family. You can’t tell me you seriously n on staying single for the rest of your life.”

I sighed and dropped a jacket onto the bed, taking a brief moment to collect myself.

“I’m not going on any more blind dates, James. That’s not up for debate,” I said, finally looking at him. “But I haven’t closed my heart off either. When I’m ready, love will find me. Right now, I just need to focus on forgetting everything that’s happened in thest five years. That’s my priority.”

James nodded slowly, almost like he was weighing my words. Then, with a slight grin, he stood up and tossed another shirt into the basket.

“Well, I can help with that,” he said. “You keep remembering the past because your mind’s empty. If your head was full–work, passion, distractionsb–/bbyou /bwouldn’t even have time to remember that you had a past.”

I stared at him for a moment, the weight of his words settling somewhere deep inside me.

Maybe he had a point.

Maybe it wasn’t about forcing myself to forget… but about filling my life with something newb, /bsomething real, so the past didn’t have room to haunt me anymore.