CHAPTER 181: ELI’S DIY FAMILY PLANNING METHOD

Constantine was upset at what Mr. Zach was insinuating; they had followed all of the rules set forth by him. Constantine called Jake and alerted him to the situation that was happening and that he needed to return to the house to pick up the condoms so they could be checked.

"Don’t worry, I’ll go to the house, get all the condoms from the bedroom, and head straight to the clinic," Jake told Constantine.

When Jake entered the cottage, he was a little surprised to see Eli sitting on the couch. Before he could take two steps into the house, Eli spoke up.

"I need to speak to you, and it’s urgent," Eli said.

"I’ll speak to you later, but right now I need to go to the bedroom, pick up something, and head to the clinic," Jake responded.

Eli held up the condoms in their packages. "Was this what you were looking for? Like I told you, we need to talk."

Jake sat down beside the boy. "I’m all ears. Okay, young man, what’s going on? And I want to hear the truth."

"Mr. Jake, when two people are together and in love, if there’s no glue between them, they will eventually drift apart. So I kind of made sure that there was a lot of glue between the two of you," Eli explained.

Jake sat back and wrapped his arm around Eli’s shoulder. "Okay, boy, tell me all about it. What did you do?"

"I know that you two made a promise to Mr. Zach that you would wait till Constantine’s third heat cycle before the two of you would attempt to conceive a child. But four children didn’t help my dad because there was no love between them, and he left us. Constantine has been there for us 100% of the time, and I didn’t want him to leave. He needs you more than he knows, but given your wild ways in the past and your stories, I thought maybe you might drift backwards."

Eli took a deep breath before continuing. "So the last four times you bought condoms for sex, I took a needle to them and pierced every one so that maybe you two would become parents and you wouldn’t leave us. I know Mr. Zach is very mad—he’s so mad at Constantine right now and you too—but this is my fault, and I have to make it right."

Jake started laughing and hugged Eli even harder. "Young man, you’re a boy after my own heart. Who knew that you could be so inventive and sneaky with this whole matter? But I agree we do need to go talk to Mr. Zach because he’s upset, and so is your big brother. Am I mad at you? Not in the least, not at all, because we plan to have several children—in fact, as many as we can possibly have. So you’ll have to be working at the soda shop and diner when you’re a little bit older to make up for the time that Constantine is going to have to lose during childbirth."

The two buddies walked out of the house arm in arm, headed to the clinic to break the news to Zach and Constantine.

The moment Jake walked through the door, Constantine flew into his arms, hugging and crying. "I honestly don’t know how it happened. I don’t know how. I took every precaution—we never did anything without condoms, we never did anything at all."

"Let me guess—you’re about 7 to 8 weeks pregnant now and you don’t know how it happened? Well, let me just put on a little demonstration for you since I have my assistant here, and he will show you exactly how you became pregnant without anyone knowing." Zach turned to Eli. "Assistant, would you please open an item and gently unroll it, then put some fluid in it? Zach, old buddy, when this gets through, you and I owe a couple of people an apology because we were torpedoed."

Eli took one of the condoms, removed it from its package, and unrolled it. He then took a pitcher of water and gently began to fill it up. As he held it, it slowly started to leak at the reservoir tip through its piercing.

Constantine looked at it and gasped. "It’s defective! It’s got a hole in the damn thing! I can’t believe it—we were being so careful and they produce condoms with holes in the damn things. Somebody’s going to pay for this."

Zach began to smile and then started laughing. "Eli, do I gather the fact that you possibly had a hand in this ordeal?"

Constantine was the only one who was clueless; he sat there with a dumbfounded look on his face.

"Sir, two blocks of wood can be stacked on top of each other, but if you stand them up, they’re always going to fall apart without some glue to hold them together. I decided they needed some glue between them to hold them together, or they would drift apart. Constantine being a novice at relationships and Mr. Jake being a wild one—you know he sowed seeds everywhere—so yes sir, it’s my fault that Constantine is in the shape that he’s in. It’s not his," Eli explained.

About that time, the light bulb went on in Constantine’s brain, and the pillow on the gurney suddenly slapped young Eli upside the head.

"You little shithead! You mean that you have been putting holes in the condoms so that I would get pregnant, so that I would be heavy with Jake’s child? After the promise we made to Mr. Zach, you took it upon yourself to make sure that I conceived his child? Is that what I’m hearing?" Constantine demanded.

Eli looked down. "Yes, Constantine. I took a straight pin and I have been poking a single hole in every one of the condoms since right before your cycle, and I’m responsible for my nephew’s forthcoming. But anybody can see that you two need this baby, and if I had to do it over again, I would, because he deserves you as much as you deserve him. You’re perfect together, but knowing his past, I had to make sure that he would stay. Love only carries you so far—love and the love of a child glue two people together."

Mr. Zach walked over to Eli and wrapped his arm around the young man, who was basically terrified at what the consequences were going to be. "Young man, I can’t argue with your logic, but next time talk to someone. Please don’t do this again and torpedo someone."

"Boy, when you get home, I want to tear your ass up so hard you won’t be able to sit down for a week, maybe two," Constantine said, looking at Eli.

Eli shook his head. "I understand, Constantine, and I’ll take my punishment. I’ll take every lick and I will not complain, but I am not sorry for what I did. You and Jake deserve to be parents."

Jake hugged Constantine and whispered to him, "So the time schedule got speeded up a bit. Maybe a few chores at the diner will help him, but I’m not sorry he did it. I’m going to be a father now, and I couldn’t be any happier."

"So you’re okay with what he did? The sneaking and the underhandedness?" Constantine asked.

"I didn’t say I was okay with it, but I understand why he did it, and I’m not sorry the timetable changed. But I’m so happy to have a child. We’re going to have a boy—I want to have a son to carry on my name, to carry on our bloodlines. Just think, he’s the first of many children that we can have together when you’re ready."

Constantine walked over and hugged Eli. "I’m still mad, but I understand. Let’s see if Mr. Zach can carry us to town that way we can check on the diner and come back later."

"If you all will forgive me, I need to talk to a couple of young hybrid gentlemen before they go into transition so that they can know exactly who they are, what they are, and what to expect during the transition," Zach said.

"Who is it this time, and do you need some help?" someone asked.

"No, grandfather, I’ve got it. A couple of the off-worlders—two brothers—are on the fast track because of hibernation, and they need to realize some of their attributes and why they have what they have."

As Eli walked out of the exam room, he was surprised to see the Hollis boys there—Mason and Madison. These were the ones going to transition. Boy, Jones better watch out for Madison now that he’s going through his transition; he’ll rip that thing wide open if he ever made fun of his brother Mason again.

"Hey guys, how you doing? I’ve seen it happen twice with my two older brothers who are hybrids themselves, as we all are, and it’s not that bad. Yes, you stretch as you grow, so make sure you take your clothes off and only wear a robe—you’ll shred a pair of clothes before it’s over. And you get hair in all the different places, but that’s according to your father, not your dad. Everyone knows gentlemen don’t have hair hardly anywhere. Poor Richie ended up with a forest of hair down on his butt, but I guess Malcolm likes it or he shaves him to find his goodies," Eli said cheerfully.

"Eli, that’s enough about your brother’s hairy buttocks, but you are correct in the description—it looks like a hairy forest. Tell the boys goodbye; you will see them later in school," Zach interrupted.

Eli bid them goodbye. "Good luck, guys!"