bCHAPTER /bb0131 /b

ric’s bPOV/b:

b“You told /bbme /bbthe /bbcode /bbthe /bnight I bcarried /bbyour /bdrunk bass /bbto /bbyour /bapartmentb, /brememberb?/bb” /b

bThat /bbwas /bba /bbyear /bbago/bb. /bbHe /bbhad /bcalled bthat /bnight begging for forgivenessb, /band was trying bto /bpunish himself. I bfound /bhim bat /bthe bar and brought him to his house instead of taking him bito /i/bour mother’s.

“And out bof /beverything that just happened here, that’s the one question byou’re /bworried about?b” /bI breathed, arching ba /bbrow.

bNn’s /bnostrils red and he mmed me against the wall again. I only felt a slight pressure as my head hit the wall, but not the pain.

“Why did byou /bdo that?” he seethed.

He wasn’t hitting me.

Why wasn’t he hitting me? I wanted him to hit me.

“Do what? Call you out for being unfair to my wife?”

His jaw clenched. “You came all this way to give me trouble about being unfair to your wife? I don’t fucking buy it. You’ve never been here, and if you really wanted to fucking scold me for the things I said, you’d have already hit me a long time ago. And you certainly wouldn’t let me pin you to the wall.”

Well… he got me there.

“And I’m letting you hit me right now so why the fuck aren’t you hitting me?” I finally snapped.

Nn’s eyes widened, and he stepped back, a look of confusion on his face. “Holy shit. You want me to hit you.”

b“/bDon’t sound so surprised. You do the same thing all the fucking time,” I muttered, brushing off invisible

lint from my suit jacket.

b“/bYeah. I do it because I want you to punish me. Why the hell would you want me to punish you, Ric? I thought getting married to Meadow was already the punishment you sentenced yourself to?”

I opened my mouth, about to fire back, when realization suddenly hit me.

The words he’d said to me two nights ago. He’d told me that the only reason he coulde up with that

exined why I got married to the woman whose father killed ours was that I was trying to punish

myself.

Tilting my head, I asked, “You really think the only reason I married her is because I wanted to punish

myselfb?/bb” /b

b+15 /bBONUS

b“Am /bbI /bbfucking /bbwrong /bbto /bbthink /bbthat/bb?/bb” /bhe bmuttered/b. “bWhy /belse bwould /bbyou /bbsubject /bbyourself /bbto /bbthe reminder /bof bwhat /bbhappened/bb? /bbThe /bbreminder /bbof /bbthe pain /bbour /bbfather /bbcaused /bus, band /bthen the pain HER bfather /bbcaused/bb… /b

bMutti/bb./bb” /b

He bstepped /bbcloser/b, his bjaw /bbclenching so /bhard bI /bcould see bthe /bvein in his bforehead /bbpractically /bpop. “And bwhy /bbthe /bbfuck /bbwould /bbyou /bbsubject /bMeadow bto /bbthat /btortureb? /bHow bcould /bbyou /bdo bthat /bto herb?” /b

bMy /bbeyes /bbwidened /bin surpriseb? /bHe was bdefending /bherb? /bb“/bbI’m /bnot with her bfor /bbrevenge/b,” bI /bsaid bfirmly/b. “At first, bI /bbthought /bbthat /bwas bwhat /bbI /bwanted. bBut /bbthen/bb…/bb” /bI bheaved /ba sigh, walking toward bthe /bbcounter /bto lean forward. I brested /bbmy /bhand against bthe /bedge bof /bthe bcounter/bb, /bbmy /bhead hanging between my shoulder des. “I bfelt /bbher /bbtouch /bby ident. She came bto /bthepany and was waiting on that fucking bretard /bwho broke her bheart and /bher hand grazed mine. I mean, I’d been watching her for months, but bI /bbdidn’t /bthink she wouldb…/b”

Shaking my head, I continued. “I didn’t think it was even fucking possible. Not after rissa–who’s her fucking aunt, in case byou /bbdidn’t /bknow.”

I bwasn’t /bsure Nn knew that. He bdidn’t /bcare about rissa enough to know that. He never did. It’s why bit /bwas easy bto /bforgive him for sleeping with her in the first ce. rissa, however, wanted to spite me because I wasn’t giving her as much attention as she wanted that period.

Nn froze. “Wait, what?”

I looked up at himzily. b“/bYeah, she is. But that’s not why I’m here.”

“About fucking time.”

Despite myself, a chuckle escaped my mouth. Nn shrugged his jacket off, leaning against the counter

with his arms crossed.

“That night, when you punched me, I felt it.”

A long moment passed where Nn just stared at me nkly. And then I watched as his expression formed into a confused one, with his brows furrowing, and then one of shock–with his brows going high ollibup/b. /li/ol

b“/bbNo /bfucking way,” he scoffed. “That couldn’t have fucking happened.”

“Exactly what I saidi,/i” I murmured. “Thought I was imagining things but I could’ve sworn that I felt it. It’s bwhy /bbI /bcame here. To see if you could fucking hit me again.”

Nn’s gaze narrowed. “You could’ve just asked me to touch you, man.”

b“/bbNo/bb,/b” I growled, pinching the bridge of my nose. “If I wanted a fucking touch, I’d ask my wife. I haven’t felt pain since I was fifteen years old, Nn. And that night, I fucking did. So just… fucking hit m-”

The words were barely out of my mouth when my brother swung his arm and connected his fist to my

jaw.

2/5 fne794 Newest update provided by find?novel/fne794

b+15 /bbBONUS /b

bMy /bhead jerked to the side, and a grunt escaped my mouth. Nn watched me carefullyb, /bshaking his fist, and I could tell that he was waiting impatiently for my response,

“Fuckb,/bb” /bI cursed, turning back to face him. “How well did you enjoy that?”

“Maybe a little too well,b” /bhe smirked. “Did you feel it?”

I paused as something inside my chest swelled. “Fuckb, /byes,b” /bI breathed, my eyes widening as I stared at my brother. “I can feel you, man.b” /b

bMy /bbrother raised his hands to his head. “No. Fucking. Way. How the fuck is this even possible?b” /b

I started to shake my head when a thought suddenly broke through. I didn’t want to believe bit/bb, /bjust like I didn’t want to years ago when my mother took me to a therapist.

bMy /bcondition was neurological. We all knew that. But what the therapist had suggested that day was that I try to open up. Let my guard down. Just to see if my brain was only trying to block everything out to protect me from something else.

I didn’t listen because I thought it was bullshit. I still thought it was. I didn’t let my fucking guard down around Nnb–/bAt least, I didn’t think I did. And rissa and Meadow…

Maybe I let my guard down around rissa, however, the details about the first time she touched me

were blurry.

But Meadow… I felt her touch on a random day. I didn’t even know her well enough to let my guard

around her then.

bSo /byeah, it was still some bullshit.

“The fuck’s going on in your head?”

My jaw ticked. “Just some unbelievable bullshit.”

Nn heaved a sigh. “Maybe you should–and don’t hit me for this–but I think you should see a

therapist.”

I scowled. “And what? Tell them my deepest darkest secrets? Hell no. I’m not letting anyone infiltrate my

mind.b” /b

Nn blinked twice. “Good for you, bro.” He pushed away from the counter, shrugging his jacket on. “We

done here? I need to get to the hotel. I’m alreadyte for a meeting.”

I nced at his outfit. “And that’s how you dress for a meeting?”

“I run the fucking ce. What else do you expect from me?”

Of course.

+15 bBONUS /b

b“/bWe need bto /bcatch up bsoon/b, though,” he continued. “We’re not done talking. And about Meadow…”

I bstood to /bmy full height.

“I genuinely like her. I was just a little shocked when I found out, that’s all. But I know I could’ve handled that better. I’ll apologize the next time I see her. And uh, for what it’s worth, I see the way you look at her.

And that’s all I’m gonna say on that matter.”

bMy /bchest tightened as Meadow’s question popped up in my head again. ‘Do you think you could ever feel for me the same way I feel for you?‘

I already knew the answer. But I needed to know for sure that what I felt for her wasn’t just want and

need because she could touch me.

I nodded in response, checking my wrist watch. I waste for a meeting as well.

But then, in the most awkward fashion known to man, Nn stretched his hand out for a handshake.

“The fuck is that?”

“What does it look like? I’m giving you a handshake. Calling a truce, if you will.”

I shoved out an annoyed breath. “bIf /bI shake your hand, will you stop trying to punish yourself? When I

said I forgave you, I meant it. With my whole damn heart.”

For a second, Nn froze. And then he said lightly. “I know. And yes, I’ll stop. I’m just so damn d you

can… feel me again.”

I sped my brother’s hand, feeling a wave of relief wash over me. And as I shook his hand, I knew we

were both going to be okay.

Eventually.