CHAPTER 115: FLESHLIGHT? NO. BUTTHOLIAN DUNGEON? YES. LIFE IS UNFAIR.

[ I got a death wish. ]

The System said this.

"But why?" I asked, not talking through my mind anymore.

[ Why else? Fleshlight? Seriously? That’s all you could think of? And you should be ashamed of how you have made your impression. Jack, who doesn’t even know what a fleshlight is, wants it. Because he thought if you are asking for it then it must be something perverted. Now it’s just Jack but if you keep this up, everyone will think of you like that. ]

’Alright. Geez. Don’t act like a girlfriend who just found out that her boyfriend doesn’t watch porn videos of men because of his loyalty towards her. Anyway, if it’s not a fleshlight, what is it?’ I asked, reverting back to the telepathic way of talking.

[ Who am I? ]

’You are a system.’

[ And what does a system do? ]

’Humiliate, scold, invade privacy and tell bad news.’

[ ... Okay. What else it do? ]

’Ask questions? Spit before inserting?’

[ Forget it. You are an idiot. ]

’Stop talking in riddles, man. I don’t reincarnate often to know that much about systems.’

[ Fine. I will tell you what a system does. Hold your breath. ]

I held it.

The system was creating suspense and I believe it must be something big. Wait.. big, did he get a... nevermind. Though, he received nine percent divinity, you never know.

I waited and Jack too, waited. He was completely invested in this and I hope the System doesn’t let us down.

And before I could think of more things...

[ Ding! ]

The System rang a notification.

And finally, a golden window appeared in front of me and it looked like the same window of the bathroom I used to peep in... though, the disabled woman was so mad when I did that. She even began walking because of me.

On the golden window, something was written in it and as I read it, my eyes widened as if I read braille without being blind.

And then, the system in his half robotic and half human voice read the message out loud.

[ New Quest Received! ]

[ Escape from the Buttholian Seclusium Prison—A prison so tight even the walls clench! ]

[ Description : You are in the lowest level of this prison where the most number of Malthus soldiers are guarding the cells. Your job is to escape from here with Erect and Sexis all the while making sure that no soldier recognizes you. Don’t get caught no matter what. ]

[ Quest difficulty : Hard. ]

[ Time Limit : Two Days. ]

[ Reward : Intelligence Stat would increase by 10 ten points and you would also get a surprise Skill. ]

[ Failure Penalty : You will rot in this prison forever. ]

The System finished talking and my first reaction to all of that was:

’What the fcuk?’

[ It’s your first quest. ]

’This was the change you were most excited about?’

[ Yes. I can now assign you quests like other systems. Complete them and you will become strong. This is what Supreme Man’s divinity did to me. And there is more... ]

’There is more? What else? Do I have to go to the bathroom now and drop my soap?’

[ No. Nothing normal like that. Anyway, let me show you your new status window. The one where you had everything on Max when you were born in this world. ]

’Yes. Show that. I forgot about it.’

[ Here.. ]

The quest window vanished and was replaced by another golden window.

———

[ Information : ]

[ Host Name : Racis T ]

[ Level : 1 ]

[ Divinity : 0.5% (Just enough to not suffer from pimples) ]

[ Hidden Factor : What are you looking for here? Which part of hidden did you not understand? ]

———

[ Stats :- ]

[ Strength : 5 ]

[ Speed : 4 ]

[ Aura : Negative (Your seven generations will stay in aura debt) ]

[ Agility : Doesn’t Exist Yet ]

[ Intelligence : Host Never Heard Of It. ]

———

[ Skills : 0 ]

[ Complete Quests and get skills! ]

———

[ Message from The Supreme Man : If you are seeing this, Racis, know that my lifeless body is hidden somewhere. Become strong. Become Overpowered again and find me. And if you can, bring a wig and high heels shoes too. May God Bless Me. Wait... I am a God. Alright. May God Bless You. Fight Well. ]

———

I read everything from top to bottom and went silent. Words failed me. Just like how my science teacher failed when I only tried to do an experiment to see the texture of some clothes. Not my fault his daughter was wearing those clothes at that time.

But right now, it hurts. I started as an Overpowered Hero but now in the middle of the story, I betrayed the title of the story!

’This is too much to take in.’

"Take mine then. It’s not too much."

I glared at Jack and the ghost shut his mouth.

I shook my head.

’I can see that I am at level 1. Do I have to do the same thing as other MCs to increase my level?’

[ Yes. You have to gain XP. Either by killing people, beasts, Aliens, and any other races, or completing Quests. And you can also increase your divinity if you complete an impossible level quest. I am responsible for giving you quests and rewards and that’s why I like it because I can make you do anything out of your greed for XP and Skills. ]

’Of course, you spiteful golden version of Windows XP. But what’s this hidden factor I have? Is it related to that time when I helped an old woman cross the road who was lying in the middle of it because a truck had rolled over her?’

[ ... No. It’s definitely not about that. And you won’t know it because it’s hidden. ]

’Yeah. I know. But still what is it?’

[ It’s hidden. ]

’What is it hiding?’

[ I won’t spoil its hard work of hiding it by revealing it to you. ]

’So I will get to know about it in future?’

[ That’s right. For now, finish that first Quest in 2 days and get rewards. ]

’Isn’t two days kind of less? At least give me a week. It took me three days to do something as simple as disposing the children from my basement. What makes you think I can do something as hard as escaping from a prison in two days?’

[ Keep talking like that and you will never be able to escape from the prison. ]

’Come on, man. Be serious.’

[ Fine. But you won’t get more than 2 days. I have seen people escaping from prison in just three hours in movies. You have two whole days. Make me proud. ]

’They are movies! They have no choice but to show the escape in three hours. You also need a ten point Intelligence increase.’

[ Whatever. You don’t have time for arguing with me. Do some stretching and get to work. Erect and Sexis must be waiting for you. Save them and leave this place. ]

’Right. Right. Those two are here as well. Erect must be fine but Sexis must have already committed countless crimes in the prison itself because he must be thinking he can’t get more arrested than he already is.’

I rubbed my eyes and stretched my arms.

I yawned and slowly stood up from the floor.

Jack did the same as he floated in front of me.

I looked around the cell, darkness still engulfed the corners and I couldn’t care less as well.

I had become accustomed to the stench of the cell and decided to move towards the metal bars.

I looked outside, left and right, but I saw no guards.

Jack was beside me, doing the same thing.

And that’s when an idea came to my mind.

"Jack, you are a ghost, right?"

"Thanks for noticing that."

"Then can you go outside and see where the guards are and what they are doing?"

"Sure, pal. Just you wait. I don’t know if they can see me or not. But I will try my best."

"Try your best in what? Being seen?"

"Haha. No. In being hidden. I’ll be back with all the information soon."

I nodded.

Jack returned the nod and passed through the metal rods.

I waited patiently and I was chill as well because I am sure Jack would do it. He was a ghost, being a ghost is a cheat. He could literally stand in front of people and they won’t even know it. Jack is the perfect person for being a sp—

"A GHOstttttttt!"

"Kill himmmmm!!"

"Catch himmmm!!"

"Purgeee!!"

I smacked my head at the rods. From the corner of my eyes, I saw an afraid ghost running towards me.

"Hey, pal! Guess what? They can see me."