CHAPTER 284: 284: A CHUBBY WITH COOL GLASSES

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"Who are you?" Kai narrowed his eyes. "Show yourself. I don’t even know what you are asking me to do."

At first the mist paused. Then, like the air of someone delivering pizza to a haunted mansion, it began to shift again. The roiling crimson fog condensed at the center, forming something. Not a hand. Not a weapon. Just... a shape. A wobbling, vaguely circular lump.

It coughed. No, not coughed, it sneezed? Then something dropped from the mist and landed in front of Kai with an audible plop.

Kai stared at it with wide eyes.

A fuzzy little bat hovered above the dropped object, flapping lazily like it had just awakened from a two week nap in a wine barrel.

It wore tiny round sunglasses. It had chubby cheeks and wings covered in mystic runes. Its ears twitched.

Kai blinked. "Why... did you just drop a Nine Star core at my feet?"

The bat adjusted its glasses with one wingtip. "Yes. That is my humble offering."

"Your what?" Kai asked with a confused face.

"My payment. For your help. Obviously."

Kai stared in silence, trying to process this.

The bat pointed proudly at the glowing core with a wing. "You see, I was told to find you. Only you could help me return home. My master said you had the scent of depression like him, power, and potential. And this beast core is my token of sincerity."

Kai’s eyes opened slightly bigger than before. "Did you just say... depression?"

"Well, yes. You reek of emotional burden and responsibility. It’s practically oozing out of your carapace. I can smell repressed trauma from three dimensions away."

Kai exhaled slowly, eyes narrowing. "First tell me, Who are you?"

The bat performed a midair twirl, then puffed out its chest proudly. "I am Batbat. The one and only. First of my name. Eater of energy mangoes. Screamer of dreams. Right hand of the great one who calls himself my master."

Kai tried again. "What... are you?"

Batbat beamed. "I am a familiar class symbiotic scout bonded companion assigned to interdimensional negotiation, scouting and snacking on my favourite foods."

"That was... unnecessarily specific."

Batbat flipped upside down. "My master told me to find someone like you. Someone who isn’t bound by fate. Someone... dumb enough to say yes when a talking bat shows up asking for help."

Kai didn’t respond.

Batbat coughed awkwardly. "Also, I may have jumped into the Void to escape an angry busty woman who wanted to marry me and mount me on her wall. Not in the taxidermy sense. In the... uh, romantic horror novel sense."

Kai continued staring.

"She had hungry eyes and perfume made of fermented slugs. It was a dark time. I try to run from that nasty pervert woman. I entered a void corridor. My master watched me fall through the rift and waved. Waved. Didn’t even throw me a sandwich. He didn’t even try to save me. How heartless. Can you imagine it?"

Suddenly a loud voice boomed into Batbat’s head. It was strong enough that Kai could feel the ripple.

"You know I can hear everything, right?"

Batbat froze in mid air. "Ma... Master?" Then changed the way, "B... Boss? You’re listening?"

"If you keep insulting me, I will beat your furry little bat butt with your favorite enchanted stick. One hundred times. While reciting your most embarrassing memory. The one with the pink tutu."

Batbat’s pupils dilated. "N... no need, master! It was my fault! I shouldn’t have jumped! That big chested woman tried to smooch me with her saliva stained lips but you— yes, you were merely stunned by her ugliness! I should have stayed and protected your honor!"

"Cut the drama. Bite his finger or get a drop of blood. I need to connect with him. Then I can explain everything to him."

"Right away, master!"

In Kai’s point of view, For a full minute, the bat floated silently, talking to apparently no one while doing dramatic hand gestures with his wings. Kai considered punching him. But no. His Predator instinct told him this bat was dangerous. Maybe the strongest thing on the planet right now.

And he was asking Kai for help?

Kai raised an eyebrow. "Are you talking to yourself?"

"No! I’m talking to the voice in my head that controls my destiny and occasionally insults my grooming habits! Something threatened me with my dark moments."

The voice spoke again, even deeper now. "Stop whining. Bite his finger. Or ask for his blood. Now. Don’t waste time by bad mouthing me."

Batbat turned toward Kai and coughed. "So... the thing is... My master says... I need a drop of your blood."

Kai tilted his head. "You’re joking."

"I am not. Just a drop. Tiny nibble. Then my master can talk to you directly."

Kai looked down at his armored hand, then back at the bat. "You bite me, I will fight back."

"Oh no, I have sensitive gums. You can just slice yourself a teeny bit."

Kai sighed. He could feel the overwhelming power lingering behind this absurd creature. The core on the ground was not fake. His Predator senses and the system told him this BatBat guy is much stronger than anything he ever saw. Whatever this bat was, whatever its master wanted, it had torn through a Nine-Star predator like it was a garden salad.

He drew a small dagger from his soul storage cube and gave himself a shallow cut along the side of his finger. A bead of blood formed, glowing faintly.

Batbat stared at it like it was the holy grail dipped in honey.

Kai held it out and asked, "You said a drop, right?"

"Of course! Just one! Maybe two! Definitely not more than that, " Batbat replied.

Before Kai could finish his warning, Batbat inhaled. With the force of a magical vacuum. The single drop got sucked into his mouth. Then another. Then three. Then twenty.

Kai’s eyes widened as he felt his blood essence flow like a tiny river. "Hey! HEY! Stop that! You will suck me dry."

"Oops!"

"YOU SAID ONE DROP!"