CHAPTER 282: SECRETS REVEALED

Irene had been sitting on the floor next to her grandmother’s bed, but when such a question was sent in her direction, she sat up suddenly and glanced around the room, slightly alarmed.

Luckily, Arne had gone out before to hunt. She didn’t have to worry about explaining that in front of her brother.

However, as she looked at her father, he seemed undecided about how to feel.

"How do you know about my dream?" she finally responded.

Kara smiled warmly, more warmly than Arthur had seen in a while.

"Help me sit up," she requested.

Arthur was quick to her pillows since he had been leaning against the wall as he sat next to the head of his mother’s bed. He helped her adjust so that she could sit up. It was a familiar position she had been in for weeks. She either lay down or sat up. Walking had become out of the question, to her chagrin.

"What age were you when it felt like you woke up and lived your life all over again?" Kara asked her granddaughter as she reached forward and clasped her hand.

"I was eleven," Irene admitted softly, feeling strange to be admitting it when her family was sitting next to her. "But how...?"

"Because I went through it similarly when I was younger," Kara admitted. "Every woman in our family line has been through the same thing. Unfortunately, I only had sons, so they never experienced this."

"Did it feel like a dream?" Irene asked, her voice becoming desperate.

"Yes," Kara confirmed. "Because it was. It was a premonition dream that was meant to guide you into making unexpected decisions so that you and those around you were able to survive." She coughed. "When your father was just a baby, I had a dream that, instead of moving to Chemois, I forced our family to remain north. I claimed that hardship wouldn’t last forever. This led to not only my children and family perishing due to starvation and cold, but myself as well. When I woke up, I knew I had to change the course of our lives so that we wouldn’t have to die. Tell me, dear, what happened to you."

By the end of her speech, Kara’s voice was hoarse, and she smiled faintly as she patiently waited for her granddaughter to reveal the things she had kept to herself for so long. She gave Irene’s hand a gentle squeeze, silently pushing her forward.

Irene glanced at her father, feeling somewhat insecure as if she had been dishonest for such a long time. She thought she lied to her father when she said that she had dreamed something, but her grandmother was confirming that it was, in fact, a dream, and all of the things she had experienced were in her head rather than reality. It felt strange that a life she felt so attached to was not her own.

Rather than looking on with ridicule or suspicion, Arthur merely nodded, hoping she would continue. He wasn’t a father who believed his children’s thoughts were his business; he simply wanted to be trustworthy enough to earn them.

Irene squeezed her eyes shut for a moment before she looked up and met her grandmother’s comforting gaze.

"I had a dream that I stopped sword fighting because my mother wanted me to be well-versed in etiquette rather than fighting like a proper girl," she explained. "When I was seventeen, in the dream I saw, my parents found a suitable partner for me and I was married off in the spring after I became an adult." Her eyebrows lowered as she tried to explain something that had scared her for over five years: a reality she had been doing her best to run in the opposite direction from. "When I was nineteen in that dream, I was visiting my parents but had to return home to my husband. On the way home, my carriage was overturned and I was killed by a goblin. Can you imagine? The weakest monster in the forest was able to take me out in seconds."

Kara continued squeezing her granddaughter’s hand, gently running her wrinkled fingers along the calloused hands, which were a sure sign of Irene’s dedication to knighthood.

"Do you regret the decision you’ve made or the path you took instead?" she wondered.

"Not at all," Irene responded breathlessly. "I feel much more satisfied with the outcome of my life despite all of the hardships." Irene paused and looked down at the hand being held by her grandmother. "But how did you know this? What does it all mean?"

"You are so close to becoming a volna," Kara answered with a smile. "That dream is your requirement. However, I am telling you this because I don’t believe I will be here for much longer to teach you all that comes with this title. I am the only one left, but I want to leave it with you now. If you ever have the privilege of having daughters or granddaughters, I hope that you instill within them the belief that you have the power to change your life."

Irene had to choose her words carefully. How could she break to her grandmother that she never wanted to go down that path with anyone? It also made her rethink whether or not she should shut out that possibility in its entirety, but would she be doing it for herself or her grandmother at that point?

"Then how will I learn it if you’re not there to teach me?" Irene wondered.

"When I left the north, I had to choose between carrying a baby or a few books," she admitted sadly. "I wasn’t sure I would ever see another volna born in the family. But, you know, I would bet those books have survived. Even if they are frozen up there somewhere, they were kept in a very strong chest."

Arthur had to step in.

"You’re not suggesting she goes and retrieves the books herself," he realized. "I have only made the journey north twice, and each time I ran into insurmountable trouble, whether it be monsters or nature working against me."

"I’m simply saying that if she wants to learn the lessons, then that is the way how," Kara insisted. "I’m feeling tired. If you’d like to look at my maps north, then Art may show you. They’re over there."

The old woman lazily gestured towards a different cabinet. Even though her suggestion was vague, Arthur knew exactly what she was talking about. They were the same maps he used on his own journeys.

In the meantime, Kara rolled over and settled lower into her pillows, not caring if she was sitting up. It was enough support on her head to fall asleep as she had been doing for the past weeks.

Irene cautiously glanced at her father, but she couldn’t help herself as she rushed forward and opened the cabinets.

Arthur relented in showing her where the maps were, but that was as far as he was willing to go. When they were in the living area of the house so that Kara could sleep a bit more, he turned to Irene.

"You’re not entertaining this as reality, are you?" he asked Irene as she looked over the map.

The girl had moved across the room to the stone fireplace so that she could get the best possible view of the map. She angled it so that each worn letter was visible. While it was worn, it wasn’t hard to read by any means. The ink was once dark, and it had taken a few journeys since its creation. She would cherish it so that it wouldn’t get much more worn than that.

"Entertaining it?" she repeated. "I’m not just entertaining it, I’m going to do it after I get Felix’s permission."

"You are still my child, and you still have to listen to me," Arthur persisted, making that moment one of the few times he exercised his authority.

"Then you will understand the morning I woke up at eleven years old, an entirely different person than I was the day before," she explained. "I truly believed that I had lived a different life and that each decision until now was made so I wouldn’t die when I’m nineteen, too weak to even wield a sword."

"When you stopped calling me dad," Arthur realized. "How far apart had we grown in the life you thought you lived?"

Irene softened, but her conviction to go north didn’t change.

"When I stopped practicing sword fighting, you no longer had much in common with me," she admitted. "Therefore, you stopped talking to me."

"That would never happen," Arthur insisted.

"I think I know that now," Irene admitted. "But it still doesn’t make me any less determined to go north and learn everything I can about what grandma is leaving me with. If it’s important to her, it’s important to me."

"You know that means you will have to sleep outdoors until you get there, right?" Arthur reminded her. "There are only a few months of the year when it isn’t in perpetual winter. If you go there now, you will hopefully be leaving there by the tail end of the warm season so that most monsters will only just be waking up."

"Do I have your approval?" she wondered hopefully.

"I feel as if you will go no matter what I say," he realized. "However, I will only give you two months before I follow you up myself. Four weeks there and three weeks back. That will be enough time for you to find what you need. Between the Duke’s Tower and Tungheim will be the fastest route."

Even though he was full of dread at her leaving, Irene felt honored that he trusted her with such an arduous journey and believed she could go on her own.