Smack.

After returning from the student cafeteria with Ren and the others, they gathered around the window-side seat of Haruto, discussing where to go for the upcoming Golden Week in May. Meanwhile, Harutaki reached into his JanSport backpack, pulled out a folded sheet of loose-leaf paper, and slapped it down on the desk of the neighboring classmate, Tazaki, who was in the middle of playing a mobile game.

“Eh!?”

Tazaki, who never expected anyone to approach a bottom-tier background character like him, jumped so hard he nearly dropped his phone, actually, scratch that, he did drop it face-down on the desk.

Which, in hindsight, wasn’t such a bad thing.

At least no one saw the half-naked anime girl on his screen.

“H-Harutaki… what’s this about…?”

“Why don’t you take a look yourself?”

Seeing how Tazaki shrank back like a scolded child, Harutaki could only smile wryly.

After yesterday morning’s all-school assembly, it seemed the majority of students had come to associate him, Hoshikawa Harutaki, with Nogami Izumi. Some were convinced they were dating, or at the very least, exes with lingering feelings. Others believed he’d become her newest subordinate. As a result, the school’s anonymous forum split into two factions:

[The Twilight Fenrir of the Queen!]

[The Third Treasure of the Demon King!]

He had to hand it to Nichiya High’s students, their sense of naming was certainly… literary.

The former camp claimed that he and Nogami, a scumbag and a wicked woman, had formed a destructive alliance that would plunge the entire school into a Ragnarok-like chaos.

The latter, meanwhile, referenced a famous anecdote about Oda Nobunaga, the “Demon King of the Sixth Heaven,” and his page, Mori Ranmaru.

Nobunaga had once boasted that he possessed three treasures:

one, a white-spotted hawk from the north; two, a blue stallion nicknamed “Dragon Horse,” famed for its flawless stride; and three, Mori Ranmaru himself.

A rather elegant way of putting it.

But Harutaki had no illusions about the forum’s intent, “The Demon King’s Third Treasure” clearly implied that he wasn’t just Nogami’s lackey, but her pampered boy toy.

“‘Every night, lights out by 10 PM… wake between 6:00 and 6:10 AM for a 50-minute jog, minimum distance seven kilometers…’”

Tazaki read the neatly printed text aloud, his voice trembling as he skimmed the first paragraph, then gasped.

“Harutaki, are you… joining a sports club or something?”

“Huh? This is your weight-loss plan, Tazaki.”

“Eh? M-Mine!? S-seven kilometers!?”

Anyone would’ve laughed at the boar-like squeals coming from Tazaki, but Harutaki forced himself to keep a straight face, no need to hurt the guy’s feelings any further.

“Your shoulders are shaking like crazy, Harutaki. You can just laugh, I’m used to it…”

“Pfft, don’t get used to that kind of thing, Tazaki.”

“So mean! You actually laughed out loud!”

Feigning outrage, Tazaki slumped back into his usual defeated posture.

“I thought you’d already forgotten about me, Harutaki… You can go to the cafeteria with Ren and the others now, sit at the popular table, even have the Queen herself backing you up, ”

Wait, why was this suddenly turning into a tragic school drama?

“But still, you never looked down on me or pushed me away…”

“Uh, well, considering you once snuck into the girls’ locker room, I do look down on you a little. But switching seats would mean asking Asama-sensei, and that’s too much work.”

When Tazaki started tearing up from that small bit of kindness, Harutaki couldn’t help thinking, maybe the guy wasn’t completely hopeless after all.

So, he cracked a joke to break the heavy mood before it could settle.

“Even though you sometimes act more like a demon lord than Nogami does, Harutaki-sama… a guy like you, who’d still help someone like me, you’re basically a god.”

“No amount of flattery’s going to shave even a single meter off your running distance~”

He was even using honorifics now. Unbelievable.

Harutaki sighed inwardly, unsure how to describe this greasy, overweight loner beside him.

Tazaki at least had self-awareness, he knew where he stood, knew he wasn’t liked, and being admitted to Nichiya High proved he wasn’t dumb.

Sure, Harutaki had originally planned to trick him a little with false promises, but considering Tazaki had actually helped him spread counter-rumors about Nogami and sold off some of his secondhand magazines and merch…

Well, even if he just wanted a less depressing seatmate, that was reason enough.

Helping Tazaki didn’t cost him much effort anyway.

Besides,

Besides… Shirasagi-senpai called me a “hero.”

She might’ve been younger than him in actual age, but somehow, she always felt older, calmer, more composed, like someone standing far above.

He wanted her approval.

Her praise.

To become her hero, the kind that doesn’t die chasing beauty in legend.

“On the back of that sheet is a one-month healthy diet plan,” Harutaki added casually.

Tazaki flipped it over, hands trembling.

“Wh-why is it all tofu and vegetables…”

“There’s chicken breast.”

“Only chicken breast!”

Harutaki just shrugged.

After all, as every fitness guru says, training is thirty percent effort, seventy percent diet. Burn more calories than you take in, that’s the core principle.

“Anyway, first thing you should do is get a haircut. Don’t worry about style, just make it look clean.”

As he spoke, he noticed Tazaki staring up at him with pleading eyes.

“Th-then… can we maybe… cut down the exercise part a bit…?”

“That is the minimum. Honestly, I was gonna tell you to follow YouTube tutorials next month. Don’t believe me? ”

He turned his head toward Haruto, who was nearby, and patted his shoulder.

“Hey, Haruto. Mind taking a look at this weight-loss plan for Tazaki?”

“Huh? Weight-loss plan? For Tazaki?”

Haruto glanced at the paper, then gave Tazaki a once-over. The poor guy stiffened like a soldier before inspection, desperate to look respectable in front of one of the school’s “populars.”

“This? That’s about our basketball team’s daily warm-up. Could even add more, honestly.”

“Thanks, man.”

Harutaki smiled, handing the paper back to a stunned Tazaki.

“See? I’m being merciful.”

“Then… what about social skills…? How to talk to people…?”

“Trying to run before you can walk?”

Still, considering how the carrot motivates the donkey, Harutaki decided to give him some hope for the future.

“See Ren over there?”

“Eh?”

He pointed to Ren, who’d been eavesdropping nearby. Both Ren and Tazaki froze as their names came up.

This was Harutaki’s payback for Ren teasing him earlier with the “Demon King’s Ranmaru” nickname.

“Ren, you’re the class rep, right? I remember you saying anyone can come to you for help.”

“Ah, right, except for biological problems.”

Ren reacted quickly. Piecing together what Harutaki wanted, he caught on instantly.

Meanwhile, Tazaki slumped in his chair, muttering weakly:

“Isn’t this like… a level-one villager challenging a level-ninety-nine boss…”

“Well, I’m the righteous hero here, Tazaki.”

Ren took the cue with an easy grin, his tone calm and charming, the very model of a high-tier “normie.”

Hierarchy existed everywhere, even within the ranks of the popular kids. Tazaki’s fear of them wasn’t unfounded; many loved putting others down to boost themselves.

But Ren clearly wasn’t that type.

“Conversations are just the exchange of thoughts between people. ‘I think,’ ‘me too,’ ‘why,’ ‘what do you think’, master those, and you can talk to anyone.”

He decided to give an example.

“Tazaki, what do you think of Ren?”

“I-I think he’s the top-tier of top-tier normies… Smart, handsome, cheerful, the ace of the soccer team, but still kind to everyone… like Hayama Hayato from OreGairu…”

Harutaki didn’t know who Hayama Hayato was, but Tazaki had praised Ren so earnestly that he couldn’t help relaxing.

After all, hardly anyone disliked being genuinely complimented.

“Wow, I didn’t realize I was that amazing~ Thanks, Tazaki. If you ever need help, just ask.”

Ren crossed his arms proudly.

“After all, I’m the ‘handsome guy who’s kind to everyone,’ right?”

He nodded at Tazaki with a grin, then slung an arm around Harutaki’s shoulder and sighed dramatically.

“Harutaki, you do realize you just gave the class rep more work, right? You know what that means. Let’s talk.”

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