CHAPTER 98: CHAPTER 98 WHY DO DEITIES SPEAK MANDARIN? (REQUESTING INITIAL SUBSCRIPTIONS)

EDITOR: DRAGON BOAT TRANSLATION

On May 6th, the twentieth of the third lunar month, the almanac deemed it auspicious for opening businesses, moving into a new home, and traveling; it was inauspicious for weddings, breaking ground, and burials.

Ren Suo, dragging two suitcases, stood before Heavenly Lotus Academy, feeling as if he had been transported to a fantasy world.

This school’s name is so imposing... he thought.

Heavenly Lotus Academy was the newly established Cultivator’s Academy in Lianjiang City. Its original site was apparently an unused campus of Lianjiang University Affiliated High School, but the city government had, with a broad stroke, repurposed it into Heavenly Lotus Academy.

Building upon the high school campus, Heavenly Lotus Academy had also incorporated the nearby mountains and wastelands. As this area was already close to the suburbs, the academy appeared as vast as a university campus, covering an extensive area.

Evidently, the government was not content with the initial intake of six hundred students. It seemed Heavenly Lotus Academy was poised to become a comprehensive institution for cultivators, encompassing elementary, middle, high school, and university levels.

Ren Suo entered the campus with ease and, with a security guard’s assistance, found the faculty housing. The faculty housing consisted of three rows of eleven-story residential buildings, located quite a distance from the academic buildings but conveniently next to a small supermarket, which seemed rather nice. There was an access control system at the entrance, and Ren Suo used the teacher’s ID card Yu Kuangtu had given him to swipe his way in.

He was assigned to apartment 402: a two-bedroom, one-living room, one-kitchen, and one-bathroom unit, which came well-appointed and furnished. As Ren Suo opened the door, he saw two large cardboard boxes resting quietly in the entryway.

Inside were his computer and some of his clothes. Ren Suo surveyed the apartment and felt quite satisfied. This place is even better than Uncle’s house, and all the furniture is new. The government really invested heavily and hasn’t mistreated us cultivators who are just beginning to grasp Extraordinary Strength.

Ren Suo took out an electromagnetic radiation detector. This was a device he had purchased after experiencing "Physical Fitness Optimization" and becoming thoroughly convinced of the Mini-World Game Console’s extraordinary nature. It was specifically designed to detect items like covert earpieces, bugged SIM cards, pinhole cameras, listening devices, and GPS trackers—things he routinely scanned for at home.

Selling surveillance devices was illegal, but manufacturers of counter-surveillance equipment were plentiful.

The shopkeeper who sold him the detector had also explicitly stated that high-end surveillance products often had camouflage features, making them difficult to detect. However, if one scanned the most likely places for wireless surveillance devices, any instrument transmitting wirelessly, no matter how well disguised, could still be detected at close range.

Ren Suo scanned his new home but found no such devices. Phew. He breathed a silent sigh of relief.

He did this primarily for peace of mind. After all, I’m not a key surveillance target. At best, I’m just an emergency doctor with ’some talent but mediocre aptitude.’ I’m hardly worth constant surveillance—monitoring requires manpower, after all.

A crucial reason he was willing to move to the Cultivator’s Academy was that, provided the government wasn’t monitoring him personally, his safety would be largely guaranteed.

Anyone with half a brain knows the Cultivator’s Academy is definitely a high-priority surveillance zone for the government; they’d never allow any criminals to enter. So, as long as I keep a low profile, I can play my game in peace. Even if someone sees it, the game console itself has a disguise feature, so they’ll probably just think it’s some new game.

Carefully, Ren Suo took out the Mini-World Game Console. He glanced around the living room, opened the cabinet beneath the TV stand, and tucked the console inside.

The console connects wirelessly anyway, so physical isolation is meaningless for it.

By the time he finished fiddling with these things, it was noon. Ren Suo took out his phone, planning to go out and find a good restaurant, but just then, Yu Kuangtu called.

"Have you moved in already?"

"Just finished."

"Your internet connection has been set up for you in advance. You can access the intranet forum now. You can get me that list by tomorrow, right?"

"What list?" Ren Suo asked.

Yu Kuangtu sounded exasperated on the other end. "Man, your research topic is Ren Naiser... Don’t you know about the major move he made an hour ago? I thought you’d already have some ideas formulated!"

"I’ve been busy moving for the past hour."

"Alright, time is tight on this one. Submit your list by midnight tonight. The other members of the Tactical Bureau are all busy dealing with monster disasters, so your recommendations will likely become the Tactical Bureau’s final decision. I won’t elaborate on the other potential consequences, but this is more important than the ’Demon Encyclopedia,’ so make sure you put your best effort into it."

Well, so much for dining out, Ren Suo thought.

You take their money, you solve their problems, Ren Suo mused. He shrugged, put down his phone, and went to the small supermarket downstairs. He bought a container of instant braised beef noodles, two fish sausages, and some other daily necessities. Back home, he set up his computer, cooked the noodles, and started working while he ate.

First, he opened GILIGILI, the bullet-commentary video site. Sure enough, among ’Ren Naiser’s’ recent uploads, which were mostly a series of "Over My Dead Body" videos, a ’traitor’ had suddenly appeared:

"Jedi Priest: The Prequel."

Hmm? Only the prequel?

Ren Suo mentally calculated the time. He had initially thought the Jedi Priest trial had completely concluded and that ’Ren Naiser’ had released all the content at once.

Opening the video, Ren Suo discovered this "Prequel" was 160 minutes long, longer than the previous two trial videos combined.

As soon as he started it, Ren Suo saw the familiar figures: the Lord of Billion Brilliance, the Eternal Burning Heart, and the Monarch of Wind, Rain, and Snow.

"The victors shall receive the gaze and blessing of the Lord of Billion Brilliance, the Eternal Burning Heart, and the Monarch of Wind, Rain, and Snow."

"And the losers shall also receive Our pity, recover their health, and depart from the trial."

"The trial information has already been implanted in your minds."

"Please soar through this trial without reservation. In this contest, absolutely no one will suffer any loss whatsoever."

After the three deities spent three minutes explaining the trial rules, the footage of the trial process began.

However, this video didn’t focus on a particular trial instance or a single participant’s experience; it was a highlight reel featuring 156 people!

An overweight Black woman weaved across a magma-strewn landscape, wielding a healing assault rifle as if she were unstoppable, transforming other chubby individuals into fit figures.

A chubby white man and three teammates crouched in the wilderness outside the White Snow Field. All four simultaneously threw Holy Grenades, blasting a team of Trial Participants riding in a pumpkin-shaped carriage sky-high.

A rather greasy-looking middle-aged man lay prone in the Jungle of the Land of Light; each muffled gunshot signified a 7.62mm Holy Healing Bullet "saving" a pitiable soul eight hundred meters away.

...

The video was edited with incredible flair, resembling an epic war film. It showcased exciting clips of Trial Participants saving one another, while also dedicating some footage to those who failed the trial but still underwent a complete metamorphosis and were shown dramatically changed, making viewers realize how simple the transformation from overweight to fit could be.

Ren Suo turned off the bullet comments halfway through. They were all filled with delirious remarks like, "I want to join the trial too! The kind where you lose would be fine with me!" "God, just shoot me already!" and "Let a fatty ’bless’ me, I won’t even fight back!"

Ren Suo finished his instant noodles with extra toppings as he watched the rest of the video.

’Ren Naiser’s’ editing is incredible, he thought. Paired with epic-level sound effects, the spectacular clips just keep coming one after another. I can’t bring myself to fast-forward.

Ren Suo also spotted Zhao Zili, the character he controlled, in some exciting moments. However, mixed in among 156 participants, his appearance wasn’t particularly noteworthy.

Interestingly, Ren Suo noticed a number in the top right corner of the video, ordered from No. 1 to No. 156. This number changed each time the viewpoint shifted to a different Trial Participant. For instance, the segment featuring Zhao Zili was labeled No. 98.

As he reached the final minute, the screen went black, and lines of text appeared in different languages:

Xuan Wen version: "The above are clips from the first two rounds for the 156 Trial Participants who are now in the third round. To thank everyone worldwide for supporting ’Ren Naiser,’ and in response to the call of the deities, we are now launching a prize contest! Please leave a comment with the number(s) of the Trial Participant(s) you believe will pass the third round (the number is displayed in the top right corner of each participant’s segment). ’Ren Naiser’ will randomly draw one lucky winner from those who guess correctly. This lucky individual may receive a Healing Package (contents and timing to be determined). Each person may only vote for one participant. Voting closes 24 hours after this video is released."

Ren Suo, who could barely understand English, found that the English text was almost identical to the Xuan Wen version, both detailing the prize contest.

So that’s it... Ren Suo had a sudden realization. No wonder Yu Kuangtu was in such a hurry for me to submit the analysis tonight. He wants to enter the prize contest! But this reward... it’s so strange, isn’t it? Thanking supporters? Responding to the call of the deities? Holding a raffle? How does ’Ren Naiser’ plan to deliver the prize? Isn’t it only capable of uploading edited videos?

Nevertheless, the event had sparked immense enthusiasm. On GILIGILI alone, the comments section spanned over thirty thousand pages, totaling nearly five hundred thousand entries—and that was just from one website.

Oh well, I’ll find out what’s going on in 24 hours anyway, Ren Suo thought.

He opened a new browser tab and typed in an unusual URL, one he had long since committed to memory.

After he entered the URL, a username and password login interface appeared. Upon submitting his credentials, a prompt appeared on the webpage:

"Please connect a microphone and camera. If you do not have such devices, please connect your computer and smartphone via USB cable."

The request was a bit odd, but considering it was a government intranet, Ren Suo didn’t think much of it and connected his phone to the computer.

"Please face the camera and, within ten seconds, recite the following phrase: ’The boundless horizon is my love; at the foot of the rolling green mountains, flowers are blooming.’"

Ren Suo blinked. Isn’t this that ridiculously catchy pop song that went viral a while back? he thought. Seeing the requirement, however, he complied, and the words naturally came out as a song.

"Welcome, Level 1 Researcher ’Suo’."

"Your nickname has been automatically set to a single character from your name. This can be changed, but please do not choose an offensive one."

"Based on your research topic and level, you have been automatically directed to the [Special Phenomena] subforum."

The intranet guided him to the relevant discussion board almost automatically, requiring hardly any further action on his part.

Ren Suo immediately understood. The intranet’s request for camera, microphone, and a pop song lyric was likely a form of three-factor authentication to confirm my identity.

But the technology demonstrated in this process baffled him.

When did the government’s network software technology reach this level? The computational power required for this must be immense, right? How did it manage to authenticate me using my phone’s camera and microphone? And this was just part of the login procedure!

Suppressing his astonishment, Ren Suo browsed the forum. Sure enough, although it was the [Special Phenomena] subforum, nearly all discussions were currently focused on ’Ren Naiser’.

The most popular thread among them was titled—

"Why do the Lord of Billion Brilliance, the Eternal Burning Heart, and the Monarch of Wind, Rain, and Snow all speak Mandarin?"

Ren Suo muttered to himself, "...Because that’s the only language I understand, obviously."