CHAPTER 50: POSSIBILITY

After a few hours, I went to Angelica’s house in silence, I didn’t want to talk even when Angelica tried to talk to me, I really wasn’t well enough to have conversations with anyone.

Flora treats me like an animal and has even reduced my general capabilities, she will surely finish me off, and those 3 won’t do anything to help me, I even want to tell them.

I really want to say that Flora is playing with me and that she is capable of stopping time..., but the moment I reveal this, everything ends, none of the 3 can beat Flora.

And surely Flora won’t go easy on us anymore, she’ll kill the 3 if I tell them anything, so I’m practically sacrificing my dignity just so those 3 can live a little longer.

If I tell them, Flora might be listening, the uncertainty of knowing whether it’s safe or not makes this choice impossible to make.

What I fear the most is how I will react to the "training" that Flora will give me, if it were before, I think I would have resisted well and thought of something to beat her, but now I can’t even imagine what she will do.

And I don’t know how I’ll react to her, and not knowing increases my fear, because I know this world is strange, I’m strange, everything is strange, no matter how much I try to deny it.

My chances only decrease as I discover more things, arriving at Angelica’s house, I enter and throw myself on her couch, putting my hands on my face and thinking about what I’m going to do or at least trying to think.

"Shizune..." Angelica calls me, but I ignore her.

"I know this is really bad...and we can’t fix it, after all, besides not knowing what the drug is, it’s impossible to repair the damage you’ve received..., but I want you to know that you have our support."

"We won’t let the past get in our way, you’ve shown that you wanted to change, think of this as maybe...a second chance? A chance to start over in a new way."

I remain silent, ignoring what she is saying, it simply seems ridiculous, how losing my brain capacity could be a second chance to start over?

And what kind of fresh start? Going from a villain to a mere pet of a Yandere? This fresh start is even worse than the previous situation.

"...We did a check-up and some tests on you, so we have your measurements and other information, Rose asked some employees to buy clothes, accessories, materials, and some other little things for you."

"...Don’t worry too much, we’ll take care of you...of what you like, I’ll cook for you," Angelica tries to cheer me up, but it doesn’t help much.

’What I like...’ I like many things, after all, I’ve tried many expensive foods in my life as a man...but there’s something that no expensive food has ever replaced.

"I like grilled cheese sandwiches...you take the bread, cut it into two slices...then spread butter and in a skillet you fry both sides of the bread where the butter is...then put slices of cheese between the bread, close it and wait a little until it melts slightly."

I tell her, I’m not sure why I’m saying this, I think I want to try a grilled cheese sandwich, it’s been a long time since I’ve eaten this sandwich that, although simple, is very good.

It became my favorite food because it accompanied me for a long time, I wasn’t someone with very good living conditions before getting help from Sayuri...so a simple but delicious food was a grilled cheese sandwich.

It’s not expensive, it’s easy and quick to make, and it tastes good, as it’s practical to make constantly, it ended up being one of the things I ate the most during that time.

"Okay!" Angelica says enthusiastically and goes to the kitchen while I wait, I notice that I can’t maintain focus on something for very long, just like a child easily loses interest in something after a while.

After a few minutes, Angelica comes back with a glass of orange juice and the grilled cheese sandwich I mentioned, it’s easy and quick, just as I remember.

"...Thank you..." I thank her without much enthusiasm while I grab one of the several grilled cheese sandwiches she made, when I bite into the food, the nostalgic flavor quickly appears.

’It’s good...’

The grilled cheese is perfect, and the bread is not bad at all, truly an excellent combination that reminds me of those difficult times, but that were in constant improvement.

"Shizune...do you know who did this to you?" Angelica asks me while I continue eating.

"I don’t know," I deny knowing about the subject, I can only continue denying the truth.

"...Shizune, you don’t need to be afraid to speak," she continues to insist on the subject.

"I already said I don’t know."

"...Shizune, you’re a bad liar, you know and just don’t want to talk...it was Flora, wasn’t it?" I remain silent, she’s right.

I can’t hide the lie, if a child tries to hide something, it’s obviously not well hidden because they don’t know how to lie well, and now it’s difficult for me to come up with good excuses.

That’s why all I say is that I don’t know, because I can’t lie truthfully anymore, I can only tell small lies, I know how to lie, but my mind can’t formulate a good lie.

I know what a lie is, and I remember the many lies I’ve told, but I can’t develop a good lie that can fully deceive a fully capable adult.

"...Shizune, were you threatened? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to...it was Flora, right? She somehow managed to get to you and used this suspicious drug."

"She was able to bypass the security and cameras and then drugged you and disappeared shortly after."

What Angelica says is only partially correct, she didn’t bypass the security, she just ignored everything in her way, and she didn’t drug me and disappear, she stayed talking for a short period, so it wasn’t a surprise attack.

I don’t know how to lie to get out of the situation, so I just remain silent, eating my grilled cheese sandwich.

"Haaa..." Angelica sighs, maybe she expected something different? Maybe she expected me to give a sign or agree with her, but I obviously won’t do that.

I don’t know if Flora is stalking me or something like that, it’s better for me to stay quiet, no matter how much she imagines it’s Flora’s fault, she won’t get to the right answer because she didn’t see Flora’s little clues.

She has no way of knowing that time stops, and even if she knew, she has no way of beating that head-on.

"Shizune...I’m going to add a few more rules for you to follow, okay?" I nod, it seems my life is now dictated by a bunch of rules made by crazy people.

"First, neither I nor you should have anything physical...your body is not in a good state, it can pick up bad habits and customs, so avoid things that are bad habits."

"Second, avoid touching yourself too much, avoid hurting yourself, as your immune system is lower, avoid getting too stressed, as it can interfere with the brain development of what’s left in you."

"Third, avoid as much as possible things that overstimulate your brain, this is the most important part, your brain is fragile to stimuli, if you force it too much, it can cause serious problems to your mentality."

"That’s why you shouldn’t try to solve complex tasks for your current mind, precisely to avoid this overload that you can suffer."

’So that’s it...’ This was the missing piece, you don’t need to be smart to connect this to the fact that I received this drug.

If this is going to happen to me when I receive stimuli, what’s going to happen to me if Flora keeps messing with me sexually?

"Angelica...what happens if...I’m overstimulated?" I ask, somewhat fearful of the answer.

"You’ll become stupid, depending on the stimulus, your brain is like a baby’s, it’s fragile and sensitive, and if it receives too much stimuli, it will use them to fill what you’re missing."

"You’ve lost a lot...and what you’ve lost will be replaced by what you’ll have from the point you woke up..."

"The best thing is to give you light and good stimuli, like basic studies, reading, walks, games, until your brain becomes less fragile."

"This should take 1 to 2 years, until then, any major stimulus is prohibited, or you’ll literally become stupid."

"Don’t look so sad, we’ll take care of you so you don’t get worse," she says when she sees my expression.

But my sadness is because I know this will happen to me, it’s obvious that Flora will overstimulate me nonstop, she certainly knows what will happen to me and will use it to her advantage.

’...’ I wonder if I’ll really be okay in this world, maybe I should side with Flora? If I’m obedient, I can ask for help to break my curse.

Flora manipulates time, maybe she has some variant that can help me or something like that, she can also manipulate the energy of things, maybe she can remove all the energy from my curse.

But just thinking about it is complicated, I give up and decide to wait and see how things will be for now.