bChapter /b151

Lydia

The grass felt wet under my feet as I ran around with Liam and Mason. The drizzle from earlier has not fully dried away. Mnie was at home, she hates rain and cold but Liam is different.

He was too obsessed with ying football, which is why we are here right now. “Pass it over, over here, Liam,” I screamed, chasing after the ball.

“Kick it with your toes,” Mason said just as Liam kicked the ball over to me. The ball rolled over to my end. Mason came for the ball, and it made a thud when I kicked it over to a giggling Liam.

“Don’t allow Mason to take it.”

Mason spent one hour teaching Liam the basic rules of the game, after which we split ourselves into two teams. Liam and I are on one team while Mason is, well, alone.

Liam kicked the ball and swayed to the side. Mason quickly reached for him. He stabled him, “Careful.”

I rushed over to them, sweat dripping from the side of my face. “Are you okay?” I asked panting heavily.

“Yes. I’m good.” Liam said, his chest heaved and fell. He wiped his forehead with the back of his palm.

He turned to Mason, his eyes brimming with excitement, “Did you see that? I don’t mean when I almost fell, but I’m actually getting better at this game.”

“Yes you are,” Mason agreed, meeting his height, his eyes scanned Liam, “soon you’d y better than me.”

We left the field one hourter. It was quitete at this time. The car stopped in front of the gate. Liam had been oddly silent all through the drive.

I turned around to see his head lowered, while he tugged on his fingers, “Hey!” I called to get his attention, “You okay?” He raised his head and nodded slowly.

b“/bbI /bjust feel a little guilty.” He said. The car drove through the gate. “I left Mnie at home all alone to go have fun myself.” His voice bis /bsoft. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

Mason killed the engine. But we didn’t go out,

My babies were almost six but had never been apart.

“I should have insisted we go together.” Oh my boy. I felt a twist in my heart as I watched him. “You don’t have to feel guilty.” I started not knowing how tofort him. I’d never know the ache, “Mnie wanted to stay home. She’d feel bad if she saw you like this.”

We got down, and I walked over to his side and bent down to meet his height. I wiped the little drop of btears /bin his eyes, “You, my boy, are kind and wonderful, and Mnie knows this. She’d never make you bfeel /bguilty,

you never left her behind.”

and

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My words were able to calm him. He sniffed as we walked, Mason trailing behind us. He patted him softly on his back before we stepped inside fully.

Mnie ran to us with wide hands. She first hugged Liam, holding him tightly to herself, “Did you have fun?” She asked. Liam nodded. Mnie observed his face and then squinted, “Were you crying?” She looked over to me, “Mom, did he get hurt?” Her gaze shifted to Mason.

“What happened during the game?”

“Nothing, I’m fine,” Liam said cheerfully. He scratched his eyes and then shed a smile. Seeing Mnie was enough tofort him.

“Come, I have something to show you,” she pulled him by his hand and tugged him forward, “I’ve been working on this since you left, and I think it’s time I…” Their voices died down as they ran across the sitting room, then up the stairs.

I ced one hand on my chest and drew in a scent of breath, relief flooding through me. “I was scared for a moment.” My voice was almost a whisper but Mason heard it. He ced his hand in the small of my back to give mefort.

“I knew there was nothing to worry about.” He said holding both my hands in his. I turned so we were now facing each other.

I nodded and we both stared at each other. “Do you want to stay for a drink?” I hurriedly added, “Just drink.” My face heated and I tried to hide the blush by blowing air out of my mouth.

What would he think of me?

“I’d love to but well…”

“You’re back,” Mom said, walking towards us. “Had fun?”

“Yes,” Mason said, greeting Mom, and I realised I had never officially introduced them, but that, however, didn’t seem to matter right now.

“Join us for dinner.” Mom said and Mason obliged. We had dinner instead of drinks. Once we were done with dinner it was time to put the kids to bed.

I tugged the nket covering Liam’s leg properly. He was already dozing off. His fingers curled over mine, and I leaned forward and brushed some strands of hair off his face.

“I had iso /imuch fun today.” He said, a small smile yed on my lips, he continued, “I have always wondered what it felt like to dad,” My hand on his hair paused, a cold air surged through me.

“Dads did so many things with their son.” His words were slowed. Guilt ripped through me like mes licking off dried grass. I grabbed a handful of the duvet.

“But I don’t need to wonder too much anymore. I have Mason now.” He turned his head to the side and I traced his gaze to see Mason ying with Mnie’s hair.

Mnie was seated in front of a mirror and Mason stood behind her. She had been unable to sleep, so he

7:23 Fri, Sep 19

volunteered to style her hair, and there they were.

I felt a weight in my chest.

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My gaze blurred, and I struggled to hold back the tears as I stared at Liam, “That’s why I like Mason, he acts like my father, sometimes, I see him as a dad.” He said in his small voice. My throat caught up.

He touched his cheeks and then searched my face, “Mom, are you crying!” He asked and I shook my head

“No, I’m just d,” I replied.

After leaving the twins‘ room, Mason and I stood on the balcony in my room.

“I think it’s time,” I said, my throat burned with unshed tears. Mason threw one hand over my shoulders and pulled me in. He didn’t need to ask me what I was referring to.

I recounted what Liam said to me. He stayed quiet as he listened. “Sometimes I fear the kids will hate me,” I said before I could stop myself.

“I knew I was never enough, children should grow in the love of both parents but I tried to y the part of both.” I closed my eyes, burying my face in Mason’s chest.

He rubbed his palm on my back, which I had refused to admit even to myself, “but as long as they never asked for their dad, I thought it was fine. And now, I just realised how selfish that sounds.”

“You did what was best for the kids.” I pulled my head away from his chest. Fat warm tears slid down my

cheeks.

“You don’t have to say anything,” I didn’t need his pity.

“I mean every word, Lydia,” he said in a voice strained with pain. “I know it was at a disadvantage to me, but I’d have done the same if I were in your shoes. I think it was bold of you. And you did that out of love for them. It’s normal for a mother to want to protect their children no matter how they do it.”

I searched his eyes for a clue, anything to prove he was lying, but there was none. What looked back at me was the eyes of a man who held a mixture of emotions, pride, love and raw pain.

I wrapped my hand around him in a tight hug.

I was falling deeply for this man all over again and I didn’t want to hold myself back.

“Do you want me to stay?” He asked.

“I’d love that, but…” I stopped..

“But?b” /b

“I don’t want to confuse the kids.” It would be too much to see Mason here twice in a row.

“Alright, I’ll stay with you till you are okay.” He said and that he did.

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I woke up the next day to an empty bed. There was a note close to my bed, “Have a good night’s rest, love.”

Mason didn’t leave till I fell asleep. I found myself blushing as I re–read the note.

I stood up from the bed, slipped my legs into my slippers and freshened up. It was time to make breakfast for my angels.

However, I was stopped from leaving my room when my phone rang, a call from Mia. I took the call.

“Mrs Woods is iat /iit again, she made a post, quickly, check.”