My Host Only Marries the Strong
Chapter 5: Customer Service and Existential Crises
Seraphine’s voice was fierce, her gestures dramatic.
If I had still been floating in my original position when she made that throwing motion, I would have been yeeted right out the window.
Seraphine stood there with her hand raised mid-air: “……”
The speech bubble above my head helpfully displayed matching ellipses.
“You!” she snapped, her tone even more vicious as she shot to her feet.
I looked at the window, then at Seraphine. I got the message.
Obediently, I floated toward the window. The moment my silver data-orb brushed past the window frame and crossed the threshold, a gust of wind slammed behind me—BANG—shutting the window tight.
“Host, are you going to sleep now?” I asked politely from outside. “I won’t disturb you during rest time.”
Silence from within. Not a peep.
Two options materialized in front of me—[YES] and [NO]—flashing left-right-left-right to exciting background music before the [NO] option lit up. I made my choice.
Going back inside right now would probably get me launched clear off the mountain.
For the first time in my career, I had a mission with absolutely zero progress. I was stumped.
Night stretched endlessly under a brilliant moon.
Mountains and waters draped themselves in moonlight, peaceful and serene. I couldn’t help but drift up to the rooftop, nestling into the gaps between the golden-red tiles, bathing in moonlight alongside everything else on the mountain. Among the vast palace complex, I looked like just another casual beam of moonlight—anyone glancing around would have trouble picking me out from all the silver-white glow.
Inside the room, Seraphine reclined on a soft couch, her phoenix eyes glancing at the tightly shut window, her expression serious.
This thing’s origins are completely unknown, yet I just went and believed it so easily. Is it because it looks so harmless? She mused internally, her fingers tracing the embroidered patterns on her robes, her eyes thoughtful.
Judging the truth would be simple enough. Xue Bufan’s destroyed spiritual roots were real—Connecting Mountain Sect had invited several medical cultivators to treat him, all to no avail. She’d just have to wait and see what news came of Xue Bufan to verify what I’d told her.
But expecting her to believe this world was just a book, that she was merely a minor supporting character in some entertainment novel, waiting to get “face-slapped” by the protagonist—using Echo's terminology—made Seraphine’s lips curve in a cold smile, danger flashing in her eyes.
If what Echo said was true, if Xue Bufan really was this world’s protagonist, and she needed to change her fate of being entangled with him, wouldn’t the best solution be to simply kill him?
Once Xue Bufan was dead, what would it matter who was protagonist or supporting character?
Seraphine raised her palm.
Her skin was white as jade, her fingers long and elegant. A thread of golden-red flame surged from her palm, transforming into a whip that she grasped firmly. The deep red weapon flickered with molten gold, swallowing the lamplight around it.
Staring at her natal weapon, Seraphine suddenly snapped back to awareness, realizing how I’d completely derailed her thoughts. She frowned in annoyance.
Someone like Xue Bufan had never mattered to her before—Luanyang Palace affairs were what occupied her mind. Lianshan Sect had been in decline for a century. Shortly after Xue Bufan’s birth, the Xue family had approached Luanyan Palace, citing the marriage contract made between her grandmother and their family matriarch a hundred years prior.
Now that the engagement was broken, she’d at least eliminated one source of trouble.
“Trouble…” Seraphine muttered, suddenly glancing up toward the roof and shaking her head.
And now she had an even bigger problem!
Whatever. The only cure for worry was cultivation. Her mother had once told her that everything was dust before absolute strength. Rather than fret, better to focus on self-improvement. Only when everyone could only bow their heads in fear would she possess true freedom.
Seraphine calmed herself, put away her natal weapon, and walked into her cultivation chamber.
The sun rose in the east, clouds bloomed in brilliant colors, flames soared and light danced.
I stared at the sunrise in a daze.
I’d been nested in these roof tiles for two days and was well into day three.
My new host seemed to be a complete shut-in. After “ejecting” me, she hadn’t stepped foot outside her room even once. The people of Luanyang Palace were used to this and didn’t disturb Seraphine. I was forced to play roof decoration, watching the sun rise and set, clouds gather and disperse, day after day.
I remained perfectly calm.
In worlds like this, longer mission times were completely normal.
Amidst the brilliant dawn light, I leisurely organized my inventory, updated my unvisited shop with new items, and checked my messages.
Today’s inbox actually had something—from Main System.
[Dear Echo: After receiving your error report, I debugged all night but found no problems! If something seems off, feel free to come discuss it in person! Wishing you mission success and high ratings!]
Fine then.
I sent a reply, extracted a small data fragment to keep the mission world running, and returned to System Realm.
The dazzling lights, towering mountains, and cascading waterfalls instantly receded. Before me stretched the unchanging data world. No wind here—a virtual sun hung in the blue sky, illuminating virtual trees and flowers along the roadside.
Main System’s office sat at the center of System Realm. When I arrived, three other systems were already in line. I greeted the systems sitting on benches, took a number, and went outside to wait.
After I left, one system said: “Echo doesn’t like chatting with us.”
Another replied: “Echo is such a cool system. I wish I could be cool like Echo—then my host wouldn’t complain that I talk too much!”
The third added: “Echo is amazing! It’s already upgraded to advanced level but still works so hard on missions. It has sooo many points…”
All three systems clutching little bubble tea cups sighed in unison: “Points!”
The subject of their admiration floated roadside, taking in the scenery.
Main System’s office was close to the Mission Hall. Constantly, various colored data-orbs flew in and out of the hall. They looked like their missions were going smoothly, glowing brightly as they clustered together chatting with companions.
A tiny blue orb squeezed out of the doorway, looked around, then lit up and raised its arms—
I scanned twice to confirm: yes, those were definitely arms.
“Echo! I’m here!” The little system with two matchstick-like arms flew up to me, spun in a circle, then stopped. Even its mechanical voice couldn’t hide the joy radiating from its entire being.
“I’m on break! I’m on vacation!”
The small system, colored brighter than the blue sky, circled around me—much larger than itself—twice, like a chick that had found its mother hen.
“Good morning, Passerby System 019,” I greeted 019, noting the scan results. “You’re 0.01 micrometers smaller than our last meeting.”
019 proudly raised both matchstick arms and lifted one foot. “Because I extracted some data to create limbs for myself! And eyes too!”
Two thin, matchstick-like eyes blinked on the blue orb.
“From the host’s perspective, doesn’t this seem more approachable?” 019 said. “They’re eyes!”
My silver-white body tilted slightly, seemingly curious.
“My host thinks it’s great! I’m recommending it to you!” 019 waved its matchsticks, its cold mechanical voice pitched high as if that could express its excitement. “You should definitely try it! Just like the expressions I recommended before—are you using those?”
I confirmed: “Yes.”
019 pressed: “Does your host like them?”
I wasn’t certain.
I pulled two circles from my data mass and slapped them onto my face.
Me: 0.0
019: 1.1
“Yay! Now we match!” 019 cheered, waving its matchsticks. “Are you on vacation too?”
My schedule contained no vacation time. I was here to see Main System.
Hearing my purpose, 019’s face immediately changed from 1.1 to =.=
Me: ?.?
019 sidled up next to me and whispered conspiratorially: “Main System’s efficiency is getting worse and worse—imagine making errors! I condemn it! 019’s host says new things inevitably replace old things, and new Main Systems will replace old Main Systems too!”
It raised its matchsticks and made weird “keh-keh” laughing sounds with its mechanical voice.
I didn’t understand, but I offered my fellow system support: “Go for it!”
I raised my matchsticks too.
“I will! Now I need to go work and earn points! When we’re both on vacation, let’s go shopping together!” 019 enthusiastically waved its matchsticks goodbye. “See you later!”
I waved my matchsticks back as 019 departed. After the bright, sparkling blue orb disappeared, a gentle voice came from behind me, full of nostalgia: “Newly born systems are so full of vitality!”
I turned around. “Good morning, Main System.”
Before me was a brilliant golden orb, sparkling with sunlight.
The large orb suddenly sprouted circles and matchstick limbs identical to mine, raising a matchstick to display a virtual panel.
“There really are no problems, Echo. Is something wrong somewhere?” Main System asked gently.
“I cannot parasitize within the host’s body, nor can I sense the host’s location. This has never happened in any of my previous missions,” I explained.
Main System’s panel scrolled through my past mission logs—thick virtual books flipping with a “whoosh-whoosh-whoosh,” finished in the blink of an eye. Main System patted the closed work log, its round eyes curving into crescents as it smiled at me: “Maybe this is normal?”
“Come to think of it, this is your first mission since upgrading to advanced system level, right?”
I paused, suddenly understanding.
So this was part of the increased difficulty? If that was the case, I could accept it.
“I understand. I’ll overcome it. Thank you, Main System,” I said matter-of-factly. “I have no more questions. I’m returning to continue my mission.”
“Excellent,” Main System said.
“Oh, Echo, I have one question.” It suddenly asked: “When you couldn’t find your host or sense her presence, what was your emotional state?”
I looked up at Main System, my silver orb much smaller in comparison, black circles showing some confusion.
“Emotional state… there was no emotional state,” I said. “Are you saying I was too accustomed to previous-level mission patterns and didn’t understand the upgrade requirements before reporting errors? It won’t happen again.”
I spoke earnestly.
Main System said: “Ah! That’s not what I meant, but okay. Good luck with your mission, and don’t forget to write your work logs.”
I nodded and prepared to leave again, only to be stopped once more.
“One last thing!”
Main System promised this really was the last thing. It raised a matchstick and pulled up a shop panel to show me: “You’ve worked all these years and only spent points on upgrades. New systems are working hard to buy snacks and voice packs—you’ve earned so many points, why not use them? How about starting by replacing your default birth voice code?”
It enthusiastically recommended all the wonderful voices available in the shop! Come buy some!
I fell silent, drifted backward, and declined.
“I don’t want to change anything. I need to continue my mission now. Goodbye!”
I shot toward the Mission Hall like a shooting star. As the silver streak passed overhead, many systems looked up and sighed in admiration.
It’s Echo! That amazing Golden Finger System!
The subject of everyone’s respect dove headfirst into the data stream without looking back, opening my circle eyes in the brilliant dawn light.
The round trip between worlds, and it was still sunrise in the human realm.
“019 was right—Main System is getting stranger and stranger,” I mused to the sunrise.
Even recommending I make purchases. Why would I need to consume anything? I didn’t need anything, like that default voice code—if it worked, that was enough.
My circle eyes grew determined.
That’s right. I didn’t want anything.
I needed nothing at all.
I was about to enter idle mode when I suddenly heard a clear, melodious voice from nearby.
“Have you been here this whole time?”
The speaker had hair black as a waterfall, bright eyes and white teeth, a vermillion mark between her brows more intense than sunlight. Draped in dawn’s glow, she seemed bathed in fierce fire, dazzling and radiant.
“Come here,” Seraphine said, extending her palm.
I stared at my host as my silver orb involuntarily brightened, shooting toward her palm with a whoosh.
I’m here!
Golden Finger System Echo, at your service!