CHAPTER 164: SHE CAN BE AFRAID

Hearing her last words like that made Zeran realise that Lethia had heard about Lindsey from Varrel. Her glassy stare now looked lost.

In the past, he could’ve just brushed it off with some dismissive excuse, saying the woman wasn’t important, that Lethia didn’t need to know. But why did his chest feel this heavy now?

Especially after her last confession. No matter how he dressed it, he had lied. He could’ve said it was for Lethia’s own good. But if he said it like that, he couldn’t stop thinking about what she would think of him. Why did he care now?

Was his heart finally opening?

Was this the love his mother used to speak about?

If so, it didn’t feel pleasant at all. It felt suffocating and uneasy. If this was love, why did he have to suffer like this? Why was he restless, choked by guilt and fear?

The closeness of their faces, the soft touch of Lethia’s hand on his cheek, only deepened the ache inside him. He was sure, if he kissed her right now, she would accept it. She would kiss him back. Their bodies would surrender to the desire pulling them together.

But for some damn reason, he hesitated.

Because now, he thought maybe that kiss would hurt her more.

Why the hell did he care this much about what it meant?

Zeran took a deep breath.

"I’m... I’m not hiding her. She’s—"

Lethia raised her finger and pressed it against his lips, silencing him.

"Don’t tell me. I don’t want to know." Her voice cracked, laced with a fear even she couldn’t place.

Zeran gripped her hand and kissed the back of it, slowly.

"She’s no one. Nothing. Just someone who happened to cross the wrong path with me. But all of that... It’s in the past."

Lethia’s pupils locked with his, searching, clinging to the hope that she could believe what this man was telling her.

"I don’t know what kind of poison Varrel planted on your understanding, but I have my reasons, and they’ve already paid for what they did."

"Reasons?" Lethia asked, almost unconsciously, then flinched when she realised she actually wanted to know more. "No. Don’t tell me. I don’t want to know." She turned her face away.

Zeran chuckled softly, realising he wasn’t the only one carrying an inner turmoil about whatever this was between them.

"Lethia, right now... I don’t even think about that woman. What I’m seeing right now is you. All of my focus, all of my attention these past days, has been for you. Can we just... talk about you?"

Hearing his voice soften like that brought a strange calm to Lethia’s heart. She had never heard Zeran speak like this before. Gentle. Open. His face softened too, like he was no longer holding anything back.

And it made her chest tighten. Her throat choked. Her eyes burned.

And the tears fell.

"I... I... I’m afraid." The sob slipped out, breaking through the tremble in her voice.

Zeran pulled her into his arms, pressing her head close and gently stroking the back of it.

"It’s fine... it’s fine... You’re safe now..."

Lethia buried her face in his chest and cried hard, loud, broken, raw. Like she was finally letting out everything that had been caged up tight inside her chest.

She couldn’t remember the last time she cried like this.

When her father died, she only wiped the damp corners of her eyes.

When she was rejected and betrayed, she only sobbed quietly and brushed the wetness away with the back of her hand.

But now, she didn’t want to wipe them away.

She just wanted to let it all fall, wanted to cry and scream and pour it all out like this—in his embrace.

The tighter Zeran’s arms wrapped around her, the harder she cried.

Because the deeper the hold, the deeper the fear.

She was scared, terrified that if Zeran turned away from her, if the last hope she had for their future shattered and turned out to be nothing but an illusion, she’d have nowhere else left to go.

Even if she knew her tears were breaking out from fear, Lethia still responded to Zeran’s embrace, clinging back, circling her arms tightly around his torso.

Because there was something deep inside her, something she couldn’t quite name, that whispered she was allowed to let Zeran know what she feared of. That she was allowed to feel safe with him, too.

In the past, she would’ve assumed this kind of feeling came from her pup. But right now, even if she blamed her hormones, a part of her felt jealous of her baby.

She wanted to feel Zeran fully, without the influence of her heat.

Zeran didn’t stop her from soaking his coat with her tears.

This woman—this fragile version of her—was so different from the fierce one he saw in the video. Even he hadn’t expected Lethia to have a side this raw, this shattered.

Every broken sob, every drop of her warmth that spilled onto his chest, made something in Zeran ache. A kind of ache he couldn’t name.

And strangely, while she wept so violently, their pup remained calm inside her. He smiled softly at the quiet understanding between mother and child.

The pup was giving her space, like it knew she needed to let it all out. In fact, the little thing was fast asleep, right after Zeran calmed its whimper with his gentle touch to Lethia’s belly earlier.

After a while, Lethia’s sobs began to quiet down. She really hated crying because it always gave her a headache. Slowly, she loosened her arms from around Zeran. Her eyes still burned, but her chest felt lighter.

"Are you good now?" Zeran asked.

Lethia gave a small nod.

"Where’s this oracle you mentioned?"

Lethia turned her face away, like she wasn’t sure she wanted to answer.

"She’s gone already. After all, she was Varrel’s person. She said she wanted to atone for betraying him. She didn’t want to take my side."

A response that wasn’t quite the truth. But Lethia had promised not to tell anyone. She just hoped she’d get to meet that creepy oracle again someday.

Lethia looked up, catching Zeran’s gaze. From the way his brow arched, she knew he didn’t fully buy her answer.

Then she held his stare, trying to keep her eyes steady, trying to make him believe it.

"Fine. I just wanted to thank her for helping you. Did she volunteer herself for the video too?"

Lethia nodded firmly, even though she was lying again.

She felt a bit guilty, especially now that Zeran seemed to be slowly opening up to her.

But... this wasn’t a big deal. What happened with the oracle had nothing to do with whatever she had with Zeran.

"Have you eaten yet?" Zeran asked.

Lethia shook her head slowly, and that made Zeran smile. He reached for her hand and held it.

"Let’s eat then."

Lethia and Zeran walked down the corridor, his hand gripping hers tightly. And she didn’t hesitate to tangle her fingers into his.

When they reached the lobby of Lykon Haven, a sudden wave of people swarmed in from all directions, surrounding the couple.

Lethia’s eyes widened at the chaos that came out of nowhere, but Zeran quickly wrapped his arms around her, trying to act as a barrier for her. She curled her arms around her belly to protect it.

It didn’t take long before Zeran’s bodyguards stepped in to clear the way, helping them break through the mess.

Lethia squinted hard as the blinding flashes of camera lights fired in their direction. From a glance at the IDs hanging around their necks, she could read the word Press.

She let out a sharp sigh, already fed up with these paparazzi. Couldn’t they just let her breathe?

By the time they reached the front lobby, a limousine was already waiting for them. The moment they got inside, Lethia let out a deep breath of relief the second her bum hit the leather seat.

"Sir, should we go home?" Derreck asked his boss from the front passenger seat.

Zeran blinked at Lethia. "Do you want to eat something special?"

Lethia turned to look out the window as the car drove away from Lykon Haven, frowning when she noticed paparazzi kept tailing the limo she was in.

"Are they following us?" she asked worriedly.

"Don’t worry, they’ll lose us soon. Don’t think about them. We should get used to living in the spotlight by now."

"Then how can I freely eat what I want with all the attention?"

Zeran chuckled. "You want something special? I can book any chef from any restaurant you want."

Lethia curled her lips and thought for a moment. "It’s kind of special and not at the same time... but you can’t get it in Ashenhold."

"Ashenhold has access to everything. Since we’re basically the center of the world. What kind of food do you want?"

"Sea urchin porridge."

Zeran chuckled again. "You’ve got a taste for rare food, huh? I remember we can get that in–"

"Not the usual sea urchin. I want the purple sea urchin porridge."