CHAPTER 101: A CHANCE TO CHANGE

He touched Apple’s sleeve and murmured, "Come. We must speak, and alone."

Apple tilted his head, then followed.

Hermes frowned. "What was that about?"

No answer came. They were gone into the dark.

Left alone with Glasán, Hermes turned and asked, "How did you slip from the High King’s side? Surely he would drag you back to raise another cup in your honour."

Glasán chuckled, the sound easing the weight of the night. "I told him I would breathe the sea air awhile. He waved me off, too drunk on victory to protest. Come with me, Heimon. Let us walk the coast."

So they walked together, the sea’s breath on their cheeks, the sand soft beneath their boots. They spoke of winter gone by, of letters written and read. Hermes found himself smiling simply to hear Glasán’s voice, steady and near, no ink between them, only the same air shared.

"It is beautiful," Hermes thought aloud. "To be here, to hear you speak with my own ears again. Letters are fine, but this."

Glasán’s hand brushed his.

He stopped, gaze turned serious. "Earlier... I must thank you again, Heimon. You gave your life for mine. And I, foolishly, nearly let anger consume me."

"You are forgiven," Hermes whispered.

Glasán hesitated, then pressed on. "The High King has urged me toward his daughters. I thought once to consider it. A duty, a future. But I cannot. Not now. Not when I know in my heart that to take another would be to betray the man I love, the man who saved me."

Hermes’ eyes widened just as Glasán leaned forward and kissed him.

It was not the kiss that startled him. No, his heart had long awaited that.

It was what came after.

For out of the salt mist, as though walking across the very waves, appeared a figure he knew too well. Silver hair catching moonlight. Deep smile lines on his face.

Dante Quasar.

"Shh..."

The old man pressed a finger to his lips and winked.

Hermes: "???"

***

Aphrodite took Apple to the gardens of the fort in Ailech. It was a much different venue from the smelly stables, or the rowdy banquet hall.

It was quiet.

Much like the two of them.

Apple was the first one to break the silence, despite being the one dragged there in the first place. His directness stemmed from not being able to feel awkward after all.

"Why did you take me here, Aifric?"

Aphrodite shook his head and spoke in modern English. "There’s no one else here. You don’t need to call me that."

"Mm." Apple just nodded.

Aphrodite picked a shamrock flower. "I... I was able to read your mind for the first time."

Apple’s eyes widened. It did not even occur to him to read Aphrodite’s mind even though he and Hermes still had Mindbloom.

Recalling why he had it in the first place added to that feeling of melancholy and jealousy.

During the winter, ’Heimon’ would sometimes spend the night at ’Aifric’s’ house. His parents saw nothing wrong with it, as Heimon had been close to the family since he was young. ’Ailbe’ on the other hand...

Was stand-offish. Just like his modern counterpart.

Of course, Apple knew what happened during those nights. He could feel it. Every kiss, every touch, every...

"You could?" Aphrodite suddenly asked, turning as pink as his hair.

Apple finally looked up, and saw what Apple was thinking at those moments.

["Oh gods! He has that kind of empathetic bond with Hermes? No wonder he felt so sullen... To be able to experience love but not at the same time... Like a bird with wings, but could not fly."]

Apple narrowed his eyes. "What exactly did you read from my mind? I don’t recall thinking about anything."

"You thought that... ’I can relate to her. It really is unfair.’" Aphrodite said to him. "You could actually empathize with Muirenn."

Apple shook his head. "Being able to recognize your similarities with someone is not empathy. Had I been able to feel for her despite not being on the same boat, that’s when you could say I have empathy. But I don’t, because I am the monstrous side. The heartless side."

There was a long silence that passed after that.

Aphrodite looked down at the three-leafed shamrocks. He picked one and showed it to Apple.

"This is the symbol of Ireland, and what St. Patrick used to symbolize the Holy Trinity: God the father, Jesus the son, and the Holy Spirit. Three separate leaves but one stem, representing the same being."

He placed it on Apple’s hand.

"Just like how you and Hermes were separate, but still the same."

Apple looked at the clover in his hand, then said: "It’s also meant to represent faith, hope and love. In these times, they thought a four leaf clover was rare, and so it meant luck. Faith, hope, love and luck..."

He gave back the leaf to Aphrodite. "These are things I will never have. I do not have faith in mankind like he does. I do not have hope that things will get better. I do not feel love... And I do not have the luck to suddenly change."

"But you don’t need luck to change."

Aphrodite insisted, gripping his hand instead of just letting go.

"You are already changing. Don’t you see it? You are feeling things you have not before. You chose to save him, even when you did not have to. Even when you could just be the only on, and then take over his life... The life that you covet. That you want to steal."

Apple looked away, not saying anything even when he could have.

Aphrodite kept pushing. "You were a part of Hermes when he was my friend. You were there... I knew you. I have seen you."

Apple blinked. "You have?"

"Yes.... That time someone was making fun of me for being so thin and frail. Hermes got so mad that he threw a rock at that girl, scraping her knee. He got scolded so badly that time, and had to do the kid’s assignment and chores as punishment. That was you, wasn’t it?"

Apple thought about it. "I guess it was. I am his violent side after all."

"That’s not the only thing you are." Aphrodite said, smiling at him. "You are the side of him that would automatically protect those you care about. Who would put aside fears and morality for the ones that you love. Anger is not always a bad emotion. It’s our way of expressing that things are not right... and that they need to change."

He placed his hand on Apple’s face. "You are the one who brings that change in Hermes. If not for you, he would not be where he is now."

Apple’s eyes widened at this.

"Then... It’s only fair that I also get a little bit of what he had, right?"

He then wrapped his hands around Aphrodite’s waist. Aphrodite reddened and tried to push back. "I.... I mean you’re right but..."

"You don’t own him. And he doesn’t own you." Apple said. "So... If you would be consenting..."

He leaned close, their lips almost touching.

"Can I be given the chance to earn your love too?"