CHAPTER 210: 200 MILITARY MARRIAGE AGREEMENT (2284)

The two sheets of pale paper were held in Jiang Jinghuai’s hand.

Tian Sangsang also held the same two sheets of paper. Hearing the sound of him flipping through the pages, she glanced at him, "This is the agreement I drafted. Take a look first. If you have any objections, we can discuss them together. In any case, this agreement pertains to the harmonious life of our future marriage, so it shouldn’t be treated carelessly."

"Mm," Jiang Jinghuai murmured, lowering his long lashes as he read the neat handwriting on the paper aloud in a low voice.

"Party A: Tian Sangsang; Party B: Jiang Jinghuai."

"Party A and Party B are getting married out of necessity, solely for the sake of the child. The marriage is a responsibility and obligation toward their parents, not out of mutual affection or love."

Jiang Jinghuai took a drag of his cigarette, flicked off some ash with his fingers, and looked up at her, "You can leave out this kind of nonsense next time."

Tian Sangsang met his captivating gaze through the curling smoke and, for some inexplicable reason, found the smell of the cigarette enjoyable. The retort she was about to deliver got stuck in her throat.

Jiang Jinghuai continued reading:

"1. Neither party shall interfere with the other’s personal life under any circumstances."

"What do you think? Do you have any objections?" Tian Sangsang asked expectantly.

"Apart from being redundant, it’s fine. I have no issues."

Tian Sangsang: "..."

Jiang Jinghuai continued reading, "2. The child will be jointly raised by both parties. In the event of a divorce, decisions regarding custody must respect the child’s wishes. Addendum: Neither party may use despicable, shameless, or morally corrupt means to coerce the child into siding with them."

"This sentence is also redundant." Jiang Jinghuai’s eyes darkened. "Divorce isn’t going to happen."

"Why not?" Tian Sangsang pouted in defiance.

Jiang Jinghuai chuckled lightly, tapping the papers in his hand, "Then isn’t marriage redundant too?"

"Not necessarily," Tian Sangsang countered. "Marriage is a process. During this process, who can guarantee that no unforeseen circumstances will occur? When things truly become unbearable, divorce is the only resolution."

"You already said it—we’re in a fake marriage. So that scenario doesn’t apply. Overruled." Jiang Jinghuai glanced at her briefly before his gaze returned to the paper, "3. During the marriage, all living expenses shall be shared. Upon divorce, neither party shall demand property from the other. Both Party A and Party B retain full ownership of their personal assets."

Women are so troublesome. Even things like this require nitpicking. Jiang Jinghuai’s expression darkened. "Additionally, every month I’ll give you an extra sum of money. It’s what you’re entitled to."

"Fine. Since you’re so generous, I will uphold my duties as a wife as well," Tian Sangsang agreed cheerfully without hesitation, "For example, cleaning up, cooking meals. Think of it as hiring a nanny—not only do I cook, but I also take care of the child. Heh."

"4. This agreement is confidential. It cannot be disclosed to our son or outsiders. When necessary, we can appropriately show affection for appearance’s sake; when unnecessary, adhere to the normal modes of marital life. Let’s treat each other with respect and stay out of each other’s way."

"What does ’show affection’ mean?" Jiang Jinghuai raised an eyebrow slightly. Though he could guess the meaning, he was intrigued by the peculiar term.

"It means ’sprinkling dog food,’ obviously," Tian Sangsang replied disdainfully, shaking her head. "Sigh, this is the generational gap between us. The disconnect is serious."

"Why scatter dog food?" Jiang Jinghuai glanced at Little Milk Tea, who was loitering by the doorway.

Tian Sangsang noticed Jiang Jinghuai’s puzzled gaze at Little Milk Tea and twitched her mouth corner involuntarily. "Earlier, we said that ’showing affection’ and ’scattering dog food’ are more or less the same thing. So why..."

Jiang Jinghuai raised his hand slightly, "Drop the ’we’."

It took Tian Sangsang a good long while to realize what he meant. Embarrassed, she said, "Fine. Earlier, I said that ’showing affection’ and ’scattering dog food’ are more or less the same. But why scatter dog food specifically? Why not cat food or rat poison? It just had to be dog food? We often compare single people to dogs because they tend to come off as lonely as one. There are just too many single dogs. Especially you, Jiang Jinghuai. Most of the soldiers under your command are probably single and unmarried, right? They are the very definition of single dogs! And the army? It’s practically the biggest gathering place for single dogs! They’ve nurtured countless single dogs here!"

"Of course, I could think of it as you all dedicating your lives to the country," Tian Sangsang added fawningly.

"Oh." Jiang Jinghuai stubbed out his cigarette and spoke slowly, "Speaking of dogs, I have an additional condition."

"Go ahead."

He picked up Little Milk Tea, who had scurried over to lie by his feet, his expression half-smiling, "This single dog of yours—please keep an eye on him. Don’t let him shed hair everywhere, don’t let him jump onto the bed, and give him his own small space to sleep in. I don’t want to see the house turned into a mess by him."

"Fine, fine." This neat freak! Tian Sangsang held Little Milk Tea in her lap and stroked his fur. "I’ll add that to the agreement. Actually, Little Milk Tea is very well-behaved, usually listens well, and always stays clean..." But as she stroked, her hand came away covered in dirt. "Wow! Haha, this must be because of the earthquake. I forgot to give him a bath. Hehehe."

"5. No domestic violence."

"6. No forced X." Jiang Jinghuai frowned and asked in a low voice, "X?"

It was the first time Tian Sangsang heard such a strange pronunciation—treating the ’X’ as if it were the English letter.

No, it’s ’forced intercourse’! Forced intercourse, you fool! She suppressed a laugh, shaking her head, "It’s not ’forced X,’ it’s forced... hmm. The agreement means that Party B cannot force Party A into engaging in X relations. Physical relations must occur only under mutual consent. No forced X. Forced X is a crime. Crime does not go unpunished, and its perpetrator deserves condemnation!"

Jiang Jinghuai’s fingers tightened slightly on the paper as he struggled to comprehend her furious tone. "Isn’t that something you usually do?"

Tian Sangsang shrugged. Fine, looks like she couldn’t dodge this accusation.

Fortunately, Jiang Jinghuai didn’t press further about past events. Instead, he asked, "Why write it as ’X’?"

"Because I was afraid it would get censored." Tian Sangsang smiled sweetly. Writing it plainly could result in censorship.

"Speak normally," Jiang Jinghuai said in a low voice.

"Ahem." Tian Sangsang straightened her posture and said, "As a military officer, you must understand how much society needs decorum. Using such vulgar terms should be beneath civilized individuals like us. We are educated people and should mind our words. Since I am now a military wife, I should have the awareness and responsibility of one. Certain things should be communicated using codes. You know, I know, as long as we understand each other. Building a harmonious and civilized society is everyone’s responsibility. Born into this nation, we belong to it. And in death, our spirits will rest with it. The dream of our country is my dream. Let us..."

"That’s enough." Jiang Jinghuai’s indifferent gaze swept over her as she rambled on.

"Mmm!" Tian Sangsang immediately clammed up.

Jiang Jinghuai read through the rest of the so-called military marriage rules. There weren’t any major issues in the remaining clauses.

"Alright, sign and stamp it." Tian Sangsang scrawled her name flamboyantly across the paper, then found some pigment to leave her thumbprint. Jiang Jinghuai shook his head and leisurely followed suit.

"The agreement comes in two copies—one for you, one for me. Even if we lose them, it doesn’t matter. Memorize it." Tian Sangsang smiled as she extended her hand, "Here’s to a good partnership, Captain Jiang!"

Jiang Jinghuai didn’t respond, quietly staring at her without moving. So enthusiastic...

"For Yanyan," Tian Sangsang added.

Jiang Jinghuai hesitated for a moment before silently extending his hand to grasp her slightly tanned one, then quickly let go.