CHAPTER 130: 130 - NOT CRUEL

130

~Damon’s POV

" Do you even understand what you and your brothers did to me?"

Her words pierced me. My throat tightened, but I stayed quiet, waiting for her to go on.

"You think saying you were tortured by your father makes it okay?" she snapped, her eyes red and swollen from crying. "Do you think that’s enough reason to treat me the way you did? To break me so badly I..." Her voice broke, and tears rolled down her cheeks again.

I leaned forward, my hands twitching on my knees. "Lisa..."

"No!" she shouted, shaking her head. "You don’t get to talk. Not yet. Do you know how close I was to ending everything? How close I was to just... disappearing? Because of you. Because of Kael. Because of Rowan. All of you made me feel like I was nothing."

Her sobs filled the room, raw and sharp. My chest ached hearing her say those words. I felt something in me crack.

"Lisa, I..."

She covered her face with both hands, still crying. "The only reason I didn’t do it was because of my father. Because I thought, if I left, what would that do to him? He’s already lost too much. And at the end, I could not even stay by his side till the end. So I stayed. I endured. But you don’t know how many nights I sat here and prayed for it to stop."

I couldn’t take it anymore. Her words cut straight into me, each one sharp, heavy, and filled with pain. Watching her cry, watching her shoulders tremble, knowing that I was part of the reason for her tears—it was too much. My heart was pounding so hard it felt like it was breaking through my chest. My palms were sweaty, and my throat was tight, like I couldn’t even breathe properly.

Before I even realized what I was doing, my body moved on its own. I leaned forward, my hand brushing against hers for just a second, and then I pressed my lips against hers.

It wasn’t a kiss full of passion or hunger. No, it wasn’t like that. It was soft. Careful. Almost trembling. The gentlest kiss I had ever given anyone in my life. For that single moment, the world went quiet. There were no voices, no pain, no broken memories of the past. It was just the two of us in that tiny space, the warmth of her lips against mine, and the unspoken words I was too much of a coward to say aloud.

I wasn’t trying to take anything from her. I wasn’t trying to own her or claim her. I just wanted her to know, somehow, without words, that I was sorry. Sorry for what I did. Sorry for what we did. Sorry for all the ways we broke her when all she deserved was peace.

Her lips were soft, but I could feel the faint tremble in them, like she was caught off guard, unsure. My own heart was racing so fast I thought it would tear me apart, but still, I didn’t push deeper. I just stayed there for that breath of a second, letting the kiss carry everything I couldn’t bring myself to say.

When I pulled back, her eyes were wide, shimmering with fresh tears that clung to her lashes. She looked at me as if I had crossed a line, as if I had done something completely out of place. My stomach twisted with regret, but I couldn’t take back what had already happened.

"I’m sorry," I whispered quickly, my voice trembling so badly I almost hated the sound of it. My chest rose and fell as though I had just run miles. "I shouldn’t have kissed you. I know you didn’t ask for that. I know you didn’t expect it. I just... I didn’t know how else to stop the pain in your eyes. I’m sorry."

Her lips parted slightly, but no words came. The silence stretched between us, heavy and suffocating. My palms were sweating, and I wiped them against my jeans, my heart hammering so loudly I wondered if she could hear it.

"I mean it, Lisa," I continued, forcing myself to meet her gaze even though it burned me with guilt. "I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I don’t want to be another scar in your life, another reason you stay awake at night hating yourself or the people around you. I don’t want to be that person. Not to you." My throat tightened, and I took a shaky breath. "I want to be your friend. Your best friend, if you’ll let me."

Her brows lifted slightly, as though my words didn’t make sense to her. She looked at me like she was waiting for me to take it back, to admit it was some kind of trick.

But it wasn’t.

"I want to know you," I said, softer this time, my voice dropping to something raw. "The real you. Not the version I thought I knew when I acted like a monster. Not the image I created in my head because of the things I heard or believed. I want to understand you. I want to know what makes you laugh, what makes you cry, and what keeps you up at night. I want to know the Lisa who isn’t hiding behind the pain."

My chest ached as I said it, because I realized just how much truth was behind those words. I wasn’t just apologizing. I was asking for a chance.

Her silence was deafening, but I could see the war in her eyes. She didn’t expect this from me, and I was shocked as well. Maybe she didn’t even think I was capable of it.

She blinked at me, stunned.

"I know it sounds stupid," I went on, forcing myself to keep talking. "But when I look at you, I see someone strong. Someone who didn’t let us break her, even if we tried. And that..." I exhaled, shaking my head. "That makes me want to change. That makes me want to be better. Because if you can survive what we did and still be here, still breathing, then maybe there’s hope for me too."

Lisa’s voice was soft when she finally spoke. "You’re being serious?"

I nodded slowly. "Dead serious."

Her tears didn’t stop, but her expression softened just a little.

"Why would you even want to be my friend?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Because you’re... different," I said honestly. "Because you’re not like us. You’re not cruel. You’re not cold. You’ve been through hell, and you still care about people. You still care about your father. You still fight to hold yourself together. I want to learn how you do that. I want to learn how to be... emotional again. And maybe the only way I can do that is by being close to you."