CHAPTER 189: A BAD DREAM (1)

As Alex sat there, sunk deep into the plush velvet of the extravagant couch, Nyxara’s complaints gradually trailed off into silence.

The tigress narrowed her golden eyes, her ears twitching slightly in irritation.

She had been grumbling for a solid ten minutes about being cooped up in the pocket dimension, about the overly clean scent of the city, about how the Wind Clan’s mana "smelled too smug," but the one she was aiming all that at... wasn’t listening.

Alex’s head was bowed slightly, his eyes unfocused, the shadows of the room casting soft hollows over his features.

There was no tension in his shoulders, but no ease either. His entire expression was unreadable—a mask of quiet dissonance, like someone hearing music that didn’t sit right in their chest.

It wasn’t the Alex she knew. Not the one who wore confidence like armor. Not the one whose silence usually held sharp edges. This silence was... soft. Distant.

Nyxara’s annoyance melted into curiosity, then concern.

With a soft, deliberate huff, she padded across the rug and, with a single graceful bound, leapt up and plopped herself squarely into his lap.

The sudden shift of weight jolted Alex slightly, dragging his thoughts back into the room. He blinked, his eyes refocusing to find a pair of glowing feline irises staring up at him.

"...Nyx, what the hell?"

She gave a low, pleased rumble as he instinctively reached up and began stroking her thick, silken fur. She leaned into it immediately, purring louder, stretching her long body across his lap like she belonged there.

Alex couldn’t help but smile at the reaction, the first real smile that had reached his eyes all day.

Alex’s fingers moved gently through Nyxara’s fur, slow and thoughtful, the repetitive motion grounding him in a moment of rare peace.

The steady rhythm of her purring was the only sound in the room, like a heartbeat echoing in a vacuum of thought.

Nyxara didn’t interrupt immediately. She just watched him, golden eyes half-lidded in comfort, but entirely aware.

She had known Alex long enough to understand that when he was quiet like this, it wasn’t because he lacked something to say—it was because he was fighting something within.

Finally, she spoke, her voice softer than usual, devoid of her usual teasing tone.

"So... what’s on your mind, Alex? You’ve been like this even before we left the last hotel. You’ve gone all broody again."

He didn’t respond immediately.

His hand slowed, fingers lightly trailing behind her ears as he let out a breath, not frustrated, not tired. Just... weighed.

"I don’t know," he said at last, voice low. "Ever since I saw Lauren... I’ve been off. My mind keeps spiraling."

He paused, and Nyxara didn’t interrupt.

"I’m still going through with my revenge," he continued, "That hasn’t changed. But something about seeing her—seeing her and her friends live like normal people—laughing, joking, doing shopping, dealing with the dramas on both sides of life..."

His voice trailed off again. He looked toward the window, where the Wind Clan city glimmered quietly in the night.

"It hit me different," he murmured. "Made me think. What if all of this... what if I accomplish my revenge, then what going to happen after "

Nyxara shifted, pressing her head against his chest.

"Alex... you’re not wrong for feeling this way."

He paused for a second, his hand stilling briefly in her fur, before resuming.

"This thing you’re doing—it’s not small. It’s not something someone walks away from cleanly. And it’s not something that leaves you unchanged."

Alex didn’t reply, but she saw the tightening in his jaw.

Nyxara shifted her weight slightly, curling more fully across his lap, forcing his eyes downward to meet hers.

"But that doesn’t mean you have to forget what it feels like to yearn for something ordinary," she continued, her voice laced with warmth. "You’re allowed to wonder, to feel deeply. You’re not just a weapon, Alex. You’re a person... and even weapons need a place to rest sometimes." A soft, humorless chuckle escaped Alex’s lips, a fleeting sound that barely disrupted the tranquil atmosphere. "That’s a poetic way of saying I’m emotionally unstable." With a playful swish, Nyxara lightly swatted him with her tail, a gesture that held both mischief and fondness. "Yeah, kind of, but it means you’re human. After all the time we’ve spent together, I’ve learned this much: when you begin to feel again... when your focus shifts from vengeance to the world around you... That’s when the real threats to your mission arise. Yet, it’s also when you rediscover the purpose behind what you’re fighting for." Alex met her gaze, the intensity in his dark eyes softening as he spoke in a hushed tone. "Do you think I should stop?" Nyxara blinked slowly, her emerald eyes reflecting an understanding beyond words. She shook her head gently, her voice soothing yet firm. "No, even if I urged you to halt, you wouldn’t heed my advice, just as you didn’t listen to your mother when she asked you to. I just believe you should listen to your heart. If a part of you is whispering to take a step back, then do so. Not because it will alter your ultimate goal... but because it might reshape the journey you take to get there." A serene silence enveloped them, a blanket of tranquility that felt warm and inviting rather than oppressive. Leaning back against the plush, inviting couch, Alex let his gaze drift toward the sprawling cityscape visible through the expansive window, where shadows danced and lights flickered in the evening twilight. Nyxara resumed her soothing purring, the gentle vibrations echoing in the stillness as Alex absentmindedly stroked her soft, luxurious fur, feeling an unexpected comfort in this simple, shared moment. No more words were spoken. There was nothing left to say. Only the sound of a wind-blown city humming outside, and the warmth of a trusted companion resting against a boy burdened by too many choices. And so they stayed—still, quiet, uncertain, together.