chapter 34

The silence inside the car grew heavier with every passing second. Only the engine’s roar and the rushing wind outside filled the space between us. Sera’s hands tightened on the steering wheel, her knuckles turning pale, and the speedometer kept climbing. The road lights flashed past too quickly, like we were being chased.

I sat stiffly in my seat, shoulders tense, my palms damp with sweat. My eyes darted to the speedometer, then to her profile. Her face was calm at first glance, but her lips were pressed tightly, and her jaw flexed as if she was holding something in.

“Sera-ssi,” I said carefully, my voice almost shaking, “you’re driving too fast… Can you slow down a little?”

No answer.

She kept her eyes fixed on the road, her breathing sharp and uneven, like each inhale was heavier than the last.

My throat dried. I leaned forward slightly. “Please. You’ll get us in trouble if—”

Suddenly, she slammed the brakes.

The car screeched violently, throwing my body forward before the seatbelt snapped me back. My chest tightened from the force. My heart leapt into my throat as the tires skidded against the asphalt.

“Sera—!” My voice cracked in panic.

The car jolted to a stop in the middle of the road, the engine humming low as the sudden silence swallowed us.

“What—what are you doing?”

She didn’t look at me right away. Both hands clutched the wheel, knuckles white. Her shoulders rose and fell sharply, as if she was trying to calm herself—but the tension in her posture said otherwise. Sera was clearly annoyed, but she said nothing.

Then, in a low, controlled voice, she finally spoke.

“Haemin.”

My chest tightened at the sound of my name. “…Yes?” I answered, voice unsteady.

A slow, sharp breath escaped her. “You must be proud of yourself, making me like this, huh?”

“What… what are you talking about, Sera-ssi?” I asked, already regretting opening my mouth.

“You really want to act clueless… even now?” Her tone rose slightly, sharp enough to cut through the air between us.

“That’s not what I mean—” I tried to explain, my voice breaking a little.

Sera finally turned her head, her cold eyes locking on me. “You already realize I like you, right?”

Her words hit me like a punch. My mouth opened, but no sound came out. “…Sera-ssi, I—I don’t think that’s a good idea to say.”

“Not a good idea?” She gave a short, humorless laugh, shaking her head. “You’re not that clueless, Haemin. Don’t pretend you never noticed. You knew.”

“I never thought of it like that. I…” I said quickly, my hands tightening in my lap, my voice almost pleading.

Her smile twisted faintly, more irritation than warmth. “Then what is it? You’d rather act blind? Or…”

Her voice lowered, colder now. “are you the type who enjoys being chased?”

“W-what?” her presumption catching me off guard. “You’re misunderstanding, Sera-ssi—”

“If you say so,” Her voice dropping, heavy with something unspoken.

Before I could react further, she leaned closer, her hand moving swiftly to my waist. Her touch was firm, deliberate. “If that’s what you wish…”

“S-Sera-ssi… wait—”

And just like that, she pinned both my hands against the leather seat, her fingers pressing down hard around my wrists. Her body leaned over mine, casting a shadow. She was taller, her frame pressing close, leaving me nowhere to escape.

My breath caught in my throat. The faint trace of her perfume pressed close, making it hard to ignore. Her face was so close I could see the faint shimmer of her lipstick under the dim light.

“Sera-ssi, please… calm down…” I stammered, trying to pull free, but her grip only tightened. She pressed down more firmly, her long hair falling forward, brushing against my cheek.

Her eyes met mine, dark and steady, and a slow, almost predatory smile curved her lips. For a heartbeat, I felt the deliberate tension of her desire, the silent promise of her power over me.

She leaned in closer, and I could feel her breath brushing my skin. My heart raced, every nerve on edge. And then… she stopped.

_________

Her face hovered just above mine, her breath brushing against my skin, but she didn’t move closer. The tension in her grip faltered, not by much, but enough for me to notice. Her body was still pressed over mine, trapping me in place, yet something in her eyes flickered.

Her chest rose and fell unevenly, and I felt the faint tremor in her hands as she held me there. Her lips parted, as if she wanted to speak, but no words came out. Instead, silence thickened between us, heavy with the weight of what almost happened.

Slowly, she closed her eyes, exhaling sharply, as if forcing herself back from the edge. Her grip loosened, and with a reluctant slowness, she pulled her hands away from mine. She straightened, shifting back into her seat.

I remained frozen, unsure if I should move or speak. My pulse was still racing, my body tense, but all I could do was watch as she pressed a hand to her forehead, dragging her fingers back through her hair.

“…Damn it,” she muttered under her breath. Her voice wasn’t sharp anymore.

“I… I almost…” She stopped herself, biting down on her lip, shaking her head as though the thought itself sickened her.

The silence stretched again, broken only by the sound of her breathing. When she finally turned to me, her eyes were shadowed, her expression tight.

“…I’m sorry, Haemin,” she said at last. Her voice carried none of her usual confidence—only the weight of sincerity, thick and heavy. “I shouldn’t have… I almost did something unforgivable.”

My throat felt dry. “…Sera-ssi…”

She looked away quickly, her gaze fixed on the windshield. “I lost myself. That’s not who I am… or at least, not who I want to be. But…” Her fingers clenched briefly into fists on her lap. “I… I forget myself sometimes.”

The irritation from before was gone. What remained was a tense, restless honesty. She wasn’t crying—Sera didn’t seem like someone who would allow herself tears—but I could feel the storm inside her.

She drew in a shaky breath and added, quieter this time, “You didn’t deserve that. I crossed a line.”

For a long moment, I didn’t know what to say.

“…It’s okay,” I managed, even though my heart was still pounding. “You stopped. That’s what matters.”

Her eyes finally met mine again, holding the gaze longer than expected before she turned away, leaning back in her seat with a long exhale.

“…Still. I’m sorry,” she whispered.

___________

The rest of the drive was painfully quiet. The earlier storm between us lingered, heavy and suffocating, but neither of us spoke. The car rolled forward, headlights cutting through the night, the city growing thinner as we neared the quieter streets.

Sera’s grip on the wheel was steady now, but I could see the faint tremble in her fingers when the traffic light cast red over her skin. She was holding herself together, masking the weight of what had just happened, and I… I didn’t know what to do except sit there, staring out the window, pretending I wasn’t unraveling inside.

Finally, the car slowed and turned into the narrow street leading to aunt’s restaurant. The familiar dim porch light flickered in the distance. My chest tightened—relief mixed with dread.

When the car stopped in front of the gate, I unbuckled my seatbelt, ready to step out. But the words in my chest refused to stay buried. I paused, fingers hovering over the door handle.

“…Sera-ssi,” I said quietly.

“Haemin—”

Our voices collided in the same instant. We both stopped, startled, then glanced at each other. Sera was the first to break into a small smile.

Her eyes flicked to me. “What is it?”

I swallowed, forcing the words out. “…I’m sorry.”

Her brows furrowed. “Sorry? For what?”

“For… acting clueless. For pretending not to notice how you felt.” My voice dropped, heavy with guilt. “I thought ignoring it would be the safest choice. But instead, it just… made things worse. It made you feel like this.”

Sera’s lips parted slightly, but no sound came. Her gaze softened, but it carried a weight I couldn’t meet.

I pressed on, before hesitation could kill my courage. “…I’ve been thinking about this for a while, trying to find the right moment to say it. But… I can’t accept your feelings. Not now. Not in the future, either.”

Her expression froze, her pupils tightening.

I forced the words out. “…This… will be the last time we meet.”

The silence shattered like glass. Sera turned sharply toward me, eyes wide with disbelief. “What…?”

I lowered my gaze. “I’m sorry. But I can’t keep seeing you. It’s better this way.”

Her voice rose, raw and sharp. “Better? You think this is better? After everything—you’re saying this is the last time?”

“…Yes.”

Her breath heavy, and I could see the storm rising behind her eyes. “So you resent me for earlier.”

I shook my head immediately. “No. That’s not it. Even if tonight didn’t happen… I would’ve told you the same thing.”

“Then why?” Her voice cracked, breaking through her composure. She leaned closer, her stare burning into me. “Why, Haemin? Give me one reason.”

My throat tightened. I wanted to tell her the truth—that I was already married. But the words refused to leave my mouth. If Sera found out now, she would certainly dig deeper.

And if she discovered that Yuna was my wife… and worse, if she happened to be one of Yuna’s competitor… what guarantee did I have that she wouldn’t use it as leverage against her?

“…It’s complicated,” I muttered, looking away. “But I mean it. This is the last time.”

Her hands balled into fists, nails digging into her palms. “No. I won’t accept that.”

I flinched at the sharpness of her tone.

Her voice dropped, trembling but fierce. “You think you can just say it’s the last time and disappear from my life? Do you think I’ll just nod and accept it quietly?”

“…Sera-ssi—”

“I won’t,” she cut in, her eyes burning with anger. “You can’t decide that on your own. Not after what you’ve done to me. Not after you made me feel this way.”

I froze, unable to respond. My chest ached, my breath unsteady.

She leaned back against the seat, eyes closing briefly, before snapping them open again. “No matter what excuse you give… I won’t accept it.”

Her words struck deep, and I just sat there in silence.

Noticing my discomfort, Sera let out a quiet sigh before continuing, her voice softer than before.

‘…You’re tired, Haemin. You’ve had too much to process tonight. I won’t press you anymore.

I blinked at her, startled by the sudden shift in tone.

“Go inside,” she said, nodding toward the gate. “Rest. Clear your head. We’ll talk another time.”

“…Sera-ssi…”

“Not another word,” she interrupted gently but firmly. “I don’t want to hear about it anymore tonight.”

The finality in her tone left no room for argument. I hesitated, then slowly reached for the door handle.

But just as I pushed it open, her voice stopped me again.

“Wait.”

I turned back.

“Your phone,” she said, holding out her hand.

“…My phone?” I asked cautiously.

Her eyes stayed on me, calm but unyielding. “Give it to me.”

I froze. “…Why?”

“If you don’t, I won’t let you out of this car.” She said plainly.

My heart skipped. “Sera-ssi…”

“Haemin.” Her voice was low, steady, immovable. “Phone. Now.”

My palms dampened as I fumbled in my pocket. Reluctantly, I handed it over.

She took it without a word, her fingers moving swiftly across the screen. The glow reflected against her face as she typed, her expression composed. Then she handed it back to me.

“There.”

I stared at the screen, confused. “…What did you do?”

“I’ve saved my number on your phone,” Sera said evenly.

She… she what?

“And I took yours too,” she added, her voice soft but firm.

Hey—hey.. What is this?

I glanced down at my screen, her contact glowing back at me.

This has to be a joke… right?

Panic began to creep in, tightening around my chest.

My breath hitched. I looked up at her, the words spilling out before I could stop them. “Sera-ssi… this… this isn’t something you should do.”

This is a death sentence. If she finds out… if Yuna even sees this for a second—

Sera tilted her head, her eyes steady on mine. “Don’t make it sound so dangerous. It’s just a number.”

I clenched the phone, my pulse hammering against my temples. Just a number? No… no, it’s not just that. She doesn’t understand.

Her lips curved into a small smile, almost kind. “Go on. You should rest. You’ve had a long day.”

“…Sera-ssi…” My voice came out tight, caught between pleading and panic.

Her smile didn’t waver. “Goodnight, Haemin.”