16 - Broken Memory, Pt. 2

The room was quiet. The cold night wind blew against the window panes, but that sound couldn’t break through. The silence between the two soulfuls decimated every force that tried to impeach it.

“I get it.” Otto said. “Is it because you think I’ll claim his powers for myself and follow my own intrusive thoughts? Hayk, I swear on my father’s gravestone that I would never stoop so low.”

“I did it again... no, I can’t. I can’t keep going like this.” Hayk said, holding his own head. “I just can’t.”

“What are you on about?” Otto asked. “Why are you refusing my offer?”

“I’m sorry, I can’t do it.” Hayk said. “The same will end up happening.”

“Hayk, I will repeat myself. There is an unknown divine power in the possession of-”

“Have I ever told you about my story in the military?” Hayk asked, with a small smile of disbelief emerging on his face. “I’ve told you about the wars, but I’ve never told you a little detail, have I?”

“Hm?”

“Back there, in the frontlines...none of us expected that there would be a war. It was right after the global governments emerged and subjugated the world. But hey, if the owner has a phone in his hands, he’ll be sure to record two of his pets fighting before stopping them. But we were all willing to fight. It was me and a few other boys in my squad. They were young, I think both of them were 19 years old. They were from the same village too.” Hayk began to tell.

“I was obviously a bit older than them. I had more experience, more wisdom. But they had the strength and courage that the young do. I remember, I was so fascinated with their strength of will. One day our outpost was under attack. I remember, at first, they tried to wipe us out with heavy artillery fire. Then, we heard the sounds of a few tanks approaching. The squad a bit further away from us took them out, but they sustained casualties too. And there, in the trench, it was the three of us. Just me and two boys who I never knew before the occasion arose. And I never saw them display cowardice.”

“They were really good men. I call them boys because of their age, but they were men. No one their age deserves to be stuck in a trench, barely surviving under artillery fire and feeding off of rations. I remember, we talked a lot. They told me about their lives and how different and fun they were. I told them about mine, and they were so damn curious about every detail. My experiences, my feelings, my ambitions...they were such good people to talk to. They were simple people too. Just an average pair of guys from a humble village home. No ulterior motives like some of the city folk possessed, no greed or pride in their eyes. They only felt pride for their home, which they deemed necessary to protect.”

“Our outpost was being taken over. Rather fast, actually. I remember when they asked me if we should attack, or wait out and hit them from behind. Since I was the oldest one, the burden of making the decisions was on me. At that point, I remember, I was so heavily devoured by their courage. I assumed everything would be fine because we would be heroes. And I told them that we should attack.”

“They looked at me, looked at each other, and nodded. Those two guys who I’ve never met before decided to trust me with their lives. Mind you, they both had families waiting for them, mothers, fathers, sisters...and their brothers were trying their hardest to fight for them. With all that in mind, they chose to trust my call. I wasn’t a sarge, or a major, or any type of officer, in fact. I was an infantryman like them, we had the same clothes, same weapon and the same rank.”

“So I decided to attack. I thought that I’d be the hero. That the three of us would be remembered as great soldiers who risked their lives. We left the trenches and advanced, making the best out of the terrain around us. The area was mostly filled with plains, we had no concrete cover to rely on or to retreat to. In front of us, a few hundred metres away, we could see their infantrymen. Once again, instead of waiting, I chose to open fire. I killed one of their soldiers on the spot, and injured the other one. My two comrades caught on, and they managed to neutralize some of them as well.”

“But I remember, I didn’t account for the fact that their reinforcements had already partially overtaken our positions. We were attacked from the side while focusing on what was in front of us. I was in the middle. Narek, who was on my left, was shot first. I quickly fired back and tried to retreat, but Gevorg, who was on my right, was already too far ahead. He was the next target. When I called out, he just looked at me, and at his friend’s lifeless body. I believe he also saw the enemy taking aim at him. He didn’t feel glory, or valor, or anything a typical soldier portrayed in the movies would feel whilst performing a stunt like this. He was scared. He didn’t want to die. Neither did Narek, and neither did I.”

“I didn’t react or scream or do anything rash. I just retreated to the trenches, being lucky enough not to get intercepted midway. From there, I regrouped with the remnants of the outposts’ defensive unit and we made our escape. So how do you think I felt, Otto? How do you think I reacted when I realized that because I tried to play the hero, their mothers would never get to see their sons return? Their sisters, who prayed in church all day hoping that their family would be safe, would instead be seeing their coffins? Would their friends be happy that they sacrificed themselves to protect them from the war? No, they’d be engulfed in grief because they’ll never get to see them again.”

“Those kids didn’t want to die, Otto. I killed them. I tried to be the hero, and I killed them.” Hayk finished. “And this happened again. I got someone killed because of a call I made, because I thought it’d be fine, because I thought we’d get to be the heroes and everything will be alright.”

“I’m sorry that you had to experience that.” Otto said, after a long pause. “If you wish to redeem yourself-”

“Redeem myself with what? By eating the same pile of garbage for the third time?” Hayk asked. “After that happened, I started punishing myself. I despised my very own existence. Every single time, when the occasion rose...I promised myself that I would be the one putting myself in danger for others’ sake. I would make sure that I alone play the role of the man sacrificing himself. I wouldn’t bring anybody down with me, and if I had the choice, I would choose to die instead of someone else. I couldn’t bear losing someone like that ever again.”

“Hayk, Victor was a soldier and he was aware of the duty bestowed upon him.” Otto said. “He might have revealed a world-altering threat to us. That is a worthy sacrifice.”

“Oh, you don’t get to decide what is a worthy sacrifice and what isn’t.” Hayk replied, sounding offended. “Go ask his family what they think about him. Go ask a friend of his whose life he might have saved.”

“And in that case, what are you going to do?” Otto asked.

“I’m going to sit it out.” Hayk sighed. “Me, Tsunehiro, and anyone who else wants to be alive and in their own corner.”

“Is that not the definition of cowardice?” Otto grunted.

“You told me yourself that you’re dealing with a divine power.” Hayk said. “I can’t bear it any more. I’m not going to get Tsunehiro killed. Who do you think picked me up from the shithole I was trapped in after realizing that I killed two people?! I owe that man my life.”

“There isn’t another Hayk Nakama.” Otto said. “I need your power to salvage the world.”

“I need my peace to salvage myself. I’m not going to let Tsunehiro and anyone else come across something that may get them killed. Otto, I am not a justice-seeking man like you. I want peace.” Hayk explained. “I want to protect people.”

“You cannot protect everyone.” Otto said. “If you exchange freedom for security, you’ll end up losing both. Perhaps, in this context, it isn’t freedom, but more so the fact that a psychopathic false God won’t get to turn the world into his plaything.”

“I cannot go.” Hayk said. “If I do, he will follow me out of his stubbornness. He will get himself killed. And everyone else who for some reason decides to get close to me will die as well.”

“One man cannot win a war.” Otto said. “There are casualties. There are sacrifices.”

“They deserve to live!” Hayk lashed out, his voice almost waking up the entire apartment block. “And I don’t! That’s the whole thing!”

Otto didn’t say anything back. After a deep breath, he simply walked out of the apartment.

“Such a shame.” Otto said. “I trusted you to make the right choice.”

The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

Otto left.

“That night...”

“After that we never really spoke or cooperated. He did his own thing, and I did my own. I moved to Tokyo and reunited with Tsunehiro.”

“I bet he laughed his heart out when he found out I’m entangled in a war against Diego’s crew.”

“...”

“I decided to use my strength for good.”

“I decided to help the soulfuls that didn’t want to be involved in the unstable shitshow of the GSC. I decided to forge a home for those who were forsaken by whomever else. I wanted someone who I could protect, even if it would cost me my life.”

“And it became reality. One after one, we found soulfuls that needed a home like ours.”

“I didn’t trust their strength, because I believed it to be blind confidence, something that could get them killed. I assumed I’d be able to take the burden all by myself.”

”I assumed I’ll be able to protect all of them, while none of them would have to do anything that risked their lives. In the end...”

[SEPTEMBER 25TH, 2024]

“I was horrendously wrong.”

The morning sun slowly creeped into the gym. Hayk got up, drenched in sweat. What woke him up wasn’t his own dream finally ending, but the entrance of two people. He looked over, only to see Ichika and Ausra.

“Hayk...” Ausra said with a shaky voice. “Is it true...?”

“Yeah.” Hayk replied. “I’m going to settle some business with Otto Richter. You’ve already seen him, haven’t you? You know that I can take him on with ease.”

“Hah, I hope so...” Ausra said. “What are those?” She said, pointing at the box of pills. Ichika approached it with curiosity, picking one and feeling it with her fingers.

“Sugar pills.” Hayk lied.

“Whatever this is, it’s not a sugar pill.” Ichika said. “Looks like it’s been tampered with.”

“You girls better go wherever you stay and spend the day there.” Hayk said. “I think I don’t need to say this, but none of you will intervene.”

“Look at yourself, Hayk.”

“How ironic is it?”

“You’re the one who is playing the hero.”

“What will they feel if you fall?”

“Hayk, are you going now?” Ausra asked.

“Yeah. I’ll spend some time outside, get used to the air, warm up a little...everything will go down in a few hours anyways.” Hayk replied.

“Rin told me...that she couldn’t bring herself to see you right now. She has a pretty bad fever.” Ausra said. “She told us to wish you good luck on her behalf.”

“Rin only said to do so if she couldn’t make it herself.” Rin said, entering the gym alongside Dima. Her movements were somewhat slower than usual.

“Hayk, please be safe.” Dima said. “I sincerely hope that everything works out.”

“You’re quite the handful.” Rin said to Hayk. “But I can’t imagine this gym without you.”

“Whatever it is, Hayk, I’m sure you’ll be fine.” Ausra said, slightly tearing up. “You’re the strongest soulful I know!”

“Hah, you’re right.” Hayk smiled.

“Just how much will their hearts break?”

He was taken by surprise. Ichika rushed towards him and hugged him as tight as possible, almost tight enough to cause pain.

“There, there.” Hayk said, patting her head.

“Hayk...please come back...” She said, trying to contain her tears.

“Hayk, over here!” Ausra said, showing her phone to Hayk. On it was a video call, connected all the way to America. It was Oskar and Sakuto waving and wishing good luck.

“Good luck, Hayk!” Oskar waved with a smile.

“Stay safe, Hayk.” Sakuto said. “And...you were right about what you told me the other day about...you know...well, thank you.”

“I’m glad you accepted it. Just don’t let go of those feelings, alright? That stuff is rare to find.” Hayk replied.

Hayk turned away from the phone and hugged Ichika tighter, trying to calm her down. Eventually, he let go, and got on one knee.

“Ichika, I’ll be fine.” He said with a smile, holding back his own tears. “I’ll come back. I promise.”

“They truly do appreciate me, don’t they?”

“Especially Ichika, who views me as much more than just a nagging supervisor.”

“Is this how their mothers felt...when they went to war?”

He slowly got up and headed for the exit. Taking one final look, he didn’t feel happiness from seeing that crowd. He felt broken. Tsunehiro and Kouta weren’t there to wish him good luck. He stepped out...

For anyone else, it was a rather scary day. Evacuation orders were already scattered all over the area, making sure that collateral damage is reduced to the minimum. He walked in the relatively empty streets, lost in his own mind. He felt both determined and desperate. He took a deep breath.

“It finally is like it was always supposed to be. I’m the one taking the deadly risk. I’m the one playing the hero.”

“As for Ichika...I’m sure she’ll be fine.”

“She’s a brave girl.”

He reached for the small waist bag with a red cross on it that he somehow snatched.

“I almost forgot. I even had to stop time to get it in time...”

“It’s the strong morphine solution that Rin used to treat Tsunehiro. It’ll be nice going into the fight with numbed pain, shit, I might even get high off of this.”

“No matter what fancy garbage Otto replicated, Time Stop will instantly finish him off.”

“I’ll keep my promise to return, for their sake.”

...

“Are you leaving this early, Sir Otto?” Reina asked, approaching Otto who was standing alone in his hotel room's living room.

“I will need to acclimatize myself with the conditions outside first.” Otto said. “I’ll need to be perfectly capable of combat. No matter the preparations, he is a tricky and dangerous opponent.”

“Understandable.” Reina sighed. She took out her phone. “Your comrades want to speak to you.”

“Sir Otto!!!” A group yelled from the other side of the phone. They shoved each other, each trying to get the phone for himself.

“Ah, it’s you.” Otto smiled.

“Sir Otto, you got this! I talked with Mukawa for the last two hours and he assured me how you would beat him!” Another voice said, excited.

“Looks like you two are getting along. That’s good to hear.”

“I assume you perfected your battle plan already.” Mukawa said, though he was outside of the camera’s view. “Don’t fuck everything up. Good luck.”

“Sir Otto, please...” Erwin said, barging into the room and trying to hold his tears back. “Please be safe.”

“There was no way I would convince him not to intervene in the fight.” Reina smiled. “While you’re busy, Otto, I’ll do a little culling here. Too many of Kaito’s dogs running around.” Reina said.

“Sir Otto, for the sake of everyone, please do what you need to do.” A lower voice said, trying to fit in the frame. Another man joined him with his own wishes.

“Thank you, everyone.” Otto said. “I promise, everything will go according to plan.”

Reina left. It was just Otto and Erwin left in the room.

“Sir Otto...” Erwin said, approaching and embracing him. “Please be safe. I wouldn’t forgive myself if something happened to you.”

“It will be okay, Erwin.” Otto replied, embracing him back. It was emotional even for him.

And soon, he left.

“Even with a fully fledged plan, I am still taking a tremendous risk.”

“There is no telling how all of these variables will play out.”

“But nevertheless, I have to focus.”

Otto went outside. He walked in the streets, feeling absolutely determined. It pained him that he had to confront someone he once considered his friend and a trustworthy ally. But it all had to be done.

“All of these preparations...I am sure that there will be a great reward.”

“Since you refuse to fight alongside me, I will take your power by force.”

“Since you have fallen too deep into Kaito’s bloodied palms, you will have to be liberated by force.”

“You will have to be sacrificed...”

“For the sake of everything that lives and breathes.”