CHAPTER 184: LENA’S ADVICE [2]

Professor Lena waited for the waiter to set down our trays—some light pasta for her, a rice bowl for me—and didn’t say anything until he walked away.

The silence wasn’t awkward. Just... thoughtful.

She picked up her fork, twirled some noodles, then looked at me again.

"You know, Rin. Fear isn’t weakness. It’s a reminder that you’re human."

She paused, then added with a small, almost sad smile, "That you still have something to lose."

I didn’t reply right away. I poked at my food, not really hungry anymore. Her words sank deeper than I expected.

Was that it?

Did I stop feeling afraid... or did I just forget what it felt like?

I wasn’t sure anymore.

"I get it," I finally said. "It’s just... in the moment, I couldn’t afford to be scared. Not when everyone else was panicking. Someone had to act."

Lena nodded slowly. "That’s admirable. But even the strongest heroes need time to process what they’ve been through."

She set her fork down and leaned forward slightly, resting her arms on the table.

"Rin, I’ve seen cadets burn out from that kind of thinking. Always pushing themselves, thinking they have to be the calmest, the smartest, the strongest... just to keep everyone else from falling apart."

Her gaze locked with mine.

"They become brilliant soldiers... and broken people."

That hit harder than I expected.

I swallowed, my throat a little dry. "Are you saying I’m on that path?"

"I’m saying you’re already halfway down it if you don’t slow down," she said gently. "And I know that’s rich, coming from me, considering the rumors about how I used to be. But that’s why I’m telling you this."

Her tone softened even more.

"You’re capable, Rin. Scarily so, for your age. But you’re still a student. You’re allowed to lean on others. You’re allowed to be scared. That’s not failure—that’s growth."

I didn’t know what to say to that.

Because I hadn’t leaned on anyone in a long time. Not really. Not since I arrived in this world.

Not since I became the protagonist.

"...So what do I do then?" I asked. "If I start being scared again, won’t that just slow me down?"

"No," Lena said, smiling just a bit. "It’ll keep you alive."

There was a beat of silence between us again. The restaurant noise faded into the background. She wasn’t just lecturing me. This wasn’t about duty or policy.

She was genuinely worried.

"You know," she added, stirring her pasta absently, "when I first read Leo’s report, I thought he was exaggerating. I thought, ’There’s no way Rin would dive into a dungeon like that, not without clearance.’ But then I saw the footage..."

I stiffened. "There’s footage?"

"Leo had his cam active. Only for a few minutes, but it was enough. I saw what you did."

Oh.

Crap.

"You were reckless," she said, not in an angry tone—just honest. "But you also saved them. I understand why Leo submitted it. Not to get you in trouble. But because... he was proud of you."

That surprised me.

Leo? Proud?

That idiot?

"He could’ve kept it quiet," Lena continued. "He chose not to. I think he’s starting to trust you more than he lets on."

I scoffed, trying not to smile. "Could’ve told me that before he got me in trouble."

Lena laughed. "He’s got a strange way of showing it. But you all do, don’t you?"

Yeah.

We really did.

Ryen teased like a menace. Leona mother-hen’d with death glares. Kiera... well, Kiera was a mystery even to herself.

And Leo? Apparently, he reported me to my sister and teacher as a form of affection.

Great.

"I’m not trying to stop you from growing, Rin," Lena said, picking up her fork again. "But I am asking you to pace yourself. There’s a long road ahead."

I looked at her for a long moment before nodding slowly.

"I’ll try," I said again, quieter this time. "Not just to keep going... but to stay human while I do."

She smiled softly and placed her hand gently over mine.

"Now... is there anything else you want to talk about?"

I hesitated.

Was there?

I wasn’t sure. But seeing how genuinely concerned she was for me, maybe this was the right time to ask for advice. Real advice—the kind I’d been avoiding because I didn’t want to deal with the emotions that came with it.

"Actually," I began slowly, "there is one thing that’s been on my mind lately."

"Oh?" she said, her tone light and inviting. "Go on. I’m listening."

I took a breath.

’Well... here goes nothing.’

"My older sister said she’s coming to visit me soon..."

Crack.

...Huh?

What was that sound?

I didn’t feel any pain, but the moment I heard it, I instinctively looked down.

Her hand was still resting on mine—warm and gentle on the surface—but for some reason, it suddenly felt... tight. Too tight.

Hostage-level tight.

And yet, her smile didn’t waver.

"Yes?" she said sweetly. "Why did you stop? Keep going."

I gulped.

This... this was a trap, wasn’t it?

She looked exactly the same. Calm. Composed. Pleasant. But something about the way she was staring made the air feel thinner.

Still, I was too far in now.

No turning back.

"She said she was worried about the dungeon incident, so she’s filing a request to visit soon..."

Yeah, I wasn’t imagining it.

The moment I said "older sister," there was a definite increase in pressure around my fingers.

Just a second, then back to normal. Like nothing happened.

"She just wants to make sure I’m okay," I added, trying to keep things casual, even though I suddenly felt like a mouse trying to casually explain itself to a smiling cat.

Lena lowered her gaze for a moment.

I couldn’t see her expression anymore.

And that made it worse.

The silence was too long. I was about to stammer an apology—even though I had no idea what I was supposed to be apologizing for—when she finally spoke.

"...I see," she said softly.

Then she looked up again.

Her smile hadn’t changed. Not a single millimeter. Her expression was as warm and composed as ever.

"I was actually hoping to meet someone from your family," she said, her voice calm and pleasant. "So if your sister does visit, I’d be happy to sit down and speak with her."

She even chuckled lightly, like we were just two normal people having lunch, talking about normal things.

But I knew better.

I knew better.

This was no longer a peaceful lunch meeting.

This was a diplomatic negotiation.

Between a student... and an apex predator pretending to be a professor.

My instincts screamed at me to choose my next words very carefully.

"That... sounds good," I said with the most neutral tone I could muster. "She’s... really looking forward to meeting people from the academy."

"Oh?" Lena tilted her head slightly, amused. "I’m sure we’ll get along very well."

The very lingered.

I smiled awkwardly and went back to poking my rice bowl.

This was fine.

Totally fine.

I was not being held hostage over a plate of carbs.

Absolutely not.

And I definitely didn’t just make a mental note to text my sister and tell her to tread carefully—very, very carefully—when she got here.