Amusement Park Rides - The Accidental Necromancer - NovelsTime

The Accidental Necromancer

Amusement Park Rides

Author: TheAmaraine
updatedAt: 2025-08-30

Biking hard the whole way, I got back to the crypt a few minutes before midnight.

Xyla had Valeria trapped in a spider-like web of vines, suspended between two trees. Valeria’s panties were visibly wet, and she was writhing in ecstasy. Her eyes were closed.

“Oh, hi Abby,” Xyla said, as if she couldn’t detect me the moment I entered the forest. She knew I was coming, alright, and her exaggerated casualness and expression of surprise didn’t fool me. “Abby’s here,” she said to Valeria. “Play time is over!”

The vines suddenly whipped through the air, and I had to duck one. Valeria dropped, and screamed, only for her fall to be arrested by some vines around her chest while she was still a half foot from the ground.

“You –” she started, glaring at Xyla.

“Now, you’re safe and sound. I would never let any harm come to you.” The sentiment probably would have been more appreciated had it not been punctuated by giggles.

“You scared me!”

She’d scared me a bit, too, although Valeria hadn’t been up that high.

“You were perfectly safe,” Xyla said, smugly, her vines slowly lowering Valeria to the ground before unwrapping. “That was fun!”

“I was just about to, um, you know, when you dropped me!” Valeria said.

“Did you have a good time?” Xyla demanded.

“Well, yes, or I wouldn’t have been so close.”

“And did I do all the work?” Xyla asked.

“Yes.”

“Well, dropping you was my fun.” And Xyla started laughing all over again.

“You were enjoying yourself the whole –” Valeria said, but then she got a better look at me. “You’re hurt!”

“Just some scratches and bites,” I said. “Nothing that needs immediate – uh, thank you.”

Valeria had ran and had already healed me before I could finish the sentence. “Anywhere else?” she asked.

“I’m fine,” I told her. “You need to finish wrapping up your scene with Xyla.”

Valeria nodded, and walked back to the sexy dryad. “Thank you Xyla, for tying me up.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Next time without the drop?”

Xyla shrugged. “You never know!” she said, with another giggle.

“Consent requires that both parties be fully informed,” I said.

Xyla grinned. “And she is fully informed that anything might happen.”

Valeria sighed. “Which is fun, until –” She patted her chest. “Goodness gracious, my heart is still racing!”

Xyla giggled.

They had to work it out for themselves. Valeria picked up her dress from one of the chairs, a simple polka-dot thing with a bit of a rock-a-billy vibe, and put it on. Then she hugged Xyla. I settled down in one of the zero gravity chairs. I was beat enough that I was tempted to cast an Endurance on myself, but that would be like drinking coffee just before bedtime. Still, I’d done a lot of cycling, and that hadn’t been the only physical activity tiring me out.

“So,” Xyla said. “Did you bang her?”

Valeria looked at Xyla. “Xyla!” she said, as if scolding her for her directness. Then she turned to me. “Well? Did you?”

“Yes. That’s why I’m all scratched up.”

Val’s eyes widened.

“It’s her thing,” I explained. “Like you with rope. She likes it rough. I think it may have something to do with orcish psychology, too – sex and dominance are linked for them.”

“Rough?” Xyla asked. “Details! Details!”

“No,” I said. “You wouldn’t like it if I told her all the details of what we did.”

She pouted. “Sure I would!”

Valeria said, “You make a good point, Abby, and of course we will respect the privacy of what you and Zargaza did. But I think the political implications are not so private.”

“The trolls and orcs are officially part of Abbyland,” I said. “And I really wish I’d come up with a better name, first. But we’re stuck with it now.”

“I like Abbyland,” Xyla said.

“It sounds like an amusement park,” I objected.

“What’s an amusement park?” Xyla asked.

I explained.

“Can we go?” she asked next.

“I don’t know of any good way to disguise just how green you are, Xyla. And it would mean leaving your forest, and a long drive.”

Xyla glanced at Valeria. “I suppose you’d take her.”

“I am not afraid to die for a just cause,” Valeria said, “But I would prefer not to die on, what did you call it? A Color Roaster?”

“Roller coaster,” I told her.

“It doesn’t sound like it coasts at all.”

“Well, it does. Just at very high speeds because of the drop. The worst of it is actually the cranking beforehand. The way down is fun.”

Valeria shuddered. “I’ll take your word for it. And I don’t see the point of giant spinning teacups.”

“I bet you’d see the point of the water rides,” Xyla said. “Especially if you wore something thin and white.” She paused, and grinned. “I think everyone would see the points.”

“And we’d get kicked out of the park,” I said. In a way, I’d love to go to an amusement park, for what might be one last time. But in my imagination, I was doing it as Abby – and that was impossible.

The body I had been born with now felt like a disguise I put on for purely practical reasons.

“Oh, also, Inka and I had sex, too.” I felt that even if they weren’t entitled to details, they did have a right to know who was in the mix.

“Yay!” Xyla said.

Valeria asked, “Does that mean she’ll be coming back here to cook for us? For that matter, is Zargaza going to move in?”

I shook my head. “No. Inka is happy, and useful, where she is. Zargaza needs to be an orc chief first and foremost. We’re not – we won’t be getting married, or anything like that. Just friends with benefits.”

Valeria rolled her eyes, and then said, “Royalty always does this sort of thing, I suppose.”

“If you have feelings,” I said, “Let’s talk about them.”

She shook her head. “No, I don’t think we need to. I think you’re being you, and I, well, I love you. So what more could I ask for? I’m not jealous – well, maybe a littie, but I can deal with that.”

“You want me to marry them?”

She shrugged. “Yes. But not against your will.”

My phone buzzed, so I pulled it out.

“Well, I think it’s pretty hot,” Xyla said. “Is that all? I mean, you’re on a roll with rolling the orcs. Were there any others? Two at once, maybe?”

“No,” I said. “Just the two.”

“Awww,” Xyla said.

Xyla and Valeria seemed fine, so I looked at my phone quickly. I had a message from Jill, saying that she needed some information Kathy had left on the computer, and that Kathy was asleep but she wanted it ASAP. There was an earlier message, too, a selfie of her taken during a traffic jam, apparently, on some freeway. She had her blouse open, and a white lacy bra. I wondered if the other drivers had gotten an eyeful. Well, as long as traffic was stopped. It was from about five hours ago, but I couldn’t tell what freeway it was on. Something pretty wide.

Valeria looked over my shoulder. “Ah. More unmarried but nonetheless available flesh.”

“Val?” I asked. “This is eating at you.”

“No. It doesn’t eat at me. That’s what eats at me.”

“Huh?”

“I ought to be offended, and I’m not.”

“Because I’m breaking the rules.”

“Yes.”

“But they are rules for you, that you’ve chosen to accept. And you follow your own rules.”

Valerie nodded. “And a queen makes her own rules.”

“Every person gets to choose their own rules. As long as they don’t hurt anyone else.”

“Or,” said Xyla, “If they only hurt people who hurt my forest!”

Valeria shrugged. “Enjoy. She does have nice breasts, doesn’t she?”

“Show me,” Xyla said.

I showed her the selfie, briefly, and then texted back, “Beautiful! Thanks! 3”

“Abby, why did you tell us about Inka?” Valeria asked.

“Well, you’re my wife. You have a right to know. I have rules that I follow, too, and that’s one of them.”

Valeria asked, “Why does our relationship give me a right to know?”

“Well, because –” I hesitated. Because kids? Well, that was solved with birth control. Because anyone I slept with I could get an infection from, and so everyone else I slept with had to be informed. But Valeria could cure anything, assuming that there were even STI’s on this world – and if there were, troll villages would be full of them after every orgy. Of course, they could just be very rare. “Because I think it’s right,” I said.

“There is nothing in the book of L’shan that covers it. Like so many situations we seem to find ourselves in.”

I shrugged.

“Well,” Xyla said, her hands on her hips. “I think it’s right for us to get all the details.”

I chuckled. “Jill says she needs me to send something from the computer, ASAP. I better go look to see what’s up.”

I went through the annex I’d built, and into the crypt itself. Suddenly, one hand wrapped around my waist from behind, and the other covered my eyes.

Dimension Step. I teleported across the crypt, and reached into my bag as I whirled to face my assailant, ready to pull out a wand or a katana as appropriate.

“You’re no fun,” Jill said. “I didn’t even get to say, ‘Guess who?’”

Her long dark hair was a little longer than last time, and her red dress showed plenty of cleavage, which I was used to with her. She had on red lipstick, which was a thing she only bothered with for special dates, usually.

“When did you get here?”

“A half-hour ago. I’ve been watching you on the security cameras.” She shrugged.

“It’s nice to see you,” I told her, sincerely, walking to close the distance I’d created.

“It’s nice to see you, too.” She took one step forward, and we hugged each other. “Oh, the squish. Gotta get used to that.”

I smiled. “You and me both.” Although I was pretty used to it by now.

“You like being her,” Jill said.

I nodded.

“It suits you. Which is weird, because being a man suited you too.” She shook her head. “It’s not my call, obviously. Anyway, I came by to pick up some gold, but I had to at least drop in.”

“Staying the night?”

“If there’s room in a certain futa’s bed,” she said.

“There is.”

“Good. Otherwise, I’d sleep in Abel’s. Although you’d be welcome to join me there, too.” She smiled. “Your preference.”

“Here,” I said.

“Thought so.”

Valeria came in, and yelled, “Jill!”

“Val!”

The two of them hugged. “You can have Abby tonight, of course,” Valeria said. I wasn’t married to Jill, either, and Valeria didn’t seem to hold it against her. And in a way she’d encouraged me to hook up with Zargaza. People are complicated – or at least, the ones worth knowing are. She turned to me. “I’ll let you two catch up, and I’ll take the side room. It’s late, and I better get some sleep.”

I kissed Valeria goodnight.

“So,” Jill said, once she’d gone. “Catch me up on the latest?”

So I told her about Abbyland, and she, too, thought it sounded like an amusement park.

“But without any rides,” I said.

“I wouldn’t say that,” she leered. “I expect I’ll have a pretty good ride here myself.”

“Um, yeah. Fifty percent better.”

“Hmm?”

So I explained that. And then I needed to explain how I’d leveled up, and that I was now the Uber Archfiend, which meant talking about Lysandra.

“You um, get around, don’t you?”

So I told her about the three orcs, too.

“Sure you have anything left in the tank for me?” she teased.

“I have a restorative spell.”

“Ah. Of course you do. C’mon, Abby. I’ve been driving all day, and I’m tired. Let’s go to bed while I still have something left in the tank for you.”

I think that was just an excuse, because it was a few hours later before either of us actually got any sleep.

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