Lysandra might not have approved of our late night carouse, but she did give me some tasty elvish bread that seemed to be a pretty good hangover cure. I managed to make myself presentable, and Lysandra took me to the Queen’s boudoir.

Maeve was waiting for me, but she was not reclined on the bed, and she was not naked. She was standing, her crown perched on her royal head. “You did not tell me, Queen Abby, that you had a male appendage.”

“Good morning to you too, your majesty.”

“Well? Why did you not tell me?”

“It didn’t come up,” I said.

“In my royal presence? You conceal, and then you insult me?”

It took me a second. “No, I didn’t mean that. I, um, well of course it was twitching. I meant that you didn’t ask.”

“Why would I ask about something like that? How could I know to ask? Here I am, about to be naked in front of someone, alone, and they have a –”

“All the previous painters were women?” I asked.

“I’m not used to being interrupted.”

Oops. I shrugged. “Were they?”

“Well, um, no.”

I didn’t address that. “And how was that handled?”

“There were attendants present, I imagine.”

“Great,” I said. I turned to Lysandra. “Don’t go anywhere.”

“They call it her royal scepter,” Lysandra told Queen Maeve. “I tried to tell your majesty, but your majesty forbade me to speak.”

The queen frowned. “You didn’t tell me,” she repeated, fixing me with a stare. “And then you went around showing it off to a crowd of commoners, and not just elves, but orcs, trolls, and … cow girls!”

“I don’t remember that,” I said honestly.

“You what?”

“In my defense, your majesty, I was drunk.”

“Well,” Queen Maeve said. “We want to see it now. And it better be at attention.”

“Nope,” I said.

“Excuse me?”

I repeated. “No.”

“Look, if you have no problems showing it off to just anyone in a tavern, it shouldn’t be a problem to show it off to Us. And surely Our beauty will inspire it. But We shall compromise. It is only required to be at attention when you can see Our unclothed form.”

“I’m not compromising,” I said. “I don’t like being ordered around. I’m here as an artist, not as someone for you to gawk at.”

Maeve smirked. “You have trouble getting it up?”

 “It’s quite large, your majesty,” Lysandra interjected. “I imagine the amount of blood necessary to fully engorge something of that size must be quite significant.”

Maeve’s eyes blazed. “Even she has seen it?” she screeched. “I can’t even imagine what it would look like!”

She had dropped the royal we, for a moment. I didn’t, on one level, mind stripping for her. If she had asked that I be naked because she was going to be naked, I’d probably have gone for that, but the idea of wanting just to see one body part didn’t feel quite like that. Also, she demanded, rather than asked. “Let’s start again,” I said. “I think this is a teachable moment.”

“A what what?” asked Maeve.

“I’m not your subject, I’m a visiting guest. When you want something from me, you ask, you don’t demand. And when you ask anything of anyone that might be sexual, you accept that they might say no, and you honor that no.”

Maeve frowned. I awaited another storm. Was I going to have to Charm her? That struck me as a very bad idea. The Elves had wizards who could probably detect that kind of thing, if she wasn’t already shielded against it.

To my surprise, Lysandra spoke up, “She is right, your majesty. Remember your proclamation, just last Spring?”

“That,” Maeve said, “Was because women were trading a bunch of men like – oh, I see your point.” She sighed. “Please allow us to gather ourselves.”

“Of course,” I said.

She took a deep breath.

“Abby, would you please show us your penis?” she said.

“Your majesty, if you wish to request me to be naked while you are naked, I would be happy to comply.”

Maeve blinked. “When you put it that way, it sounds like I’m trying to seduce you. When in fact Lysandra is here for the express purpose of stopping anything of the sort.” Another gear seemed to turn over in her mind. “But you brought two wives, I suppose …”

“She was cavorting with both of them at once when I walked in on her the first time, and saw it, your Majesty,” Lysandra said.

“Oh dear,” Maeve said, blushing.

I shook my head. “Remember what I said about consent? I won’t do anything to you that you don’t want. And really, I’m here to paint your picture, remember? That’s all that’s going on.”

“You surely don’t mean that you would refuse –”

“At some future date, I might say all sorts of things. But right now, I’m doing your portrait. And that’s it.”

I couldn’t tell for sure whether she was pleased or disappointed. Possibly both at once. “Very well,” she said. “You shall do my portrait, and we shall all take our clothes off.”

“Me, too, your majesty?” Lysandra asked.

“You, too,” Maeve said.

“Only if you’re okay with it,” I said.

Lysandra flashed me a quick smile, but she started stripping. Maeve started undoing the buttons on her gown.

I’d been to a nudist camp, and this was just like that, right? I undid the zipper at the back of my dress and let it fall to the floor.

Maeve’s eyes almost bulged out of her head as she stared at my tits. She reached out, and then stopped herself. She smiled at me, apologetically I thought. Then she took a step back, and kept unbuttoning. “Lysandra, if you could help unlace the back. When you’re done, of course.”

“Of course, your majesty.”

Lysandra walked forward. She was stark naked, and it was a very nice sight. She wasn’t especially curvy, but she had a delicate beauty that reminded me a little of Sandra – except Lysandra was somehow more perfect, with absolutely flawless pale skin that made me give it a once over for some kind of blemish. I didn’t find one.

She moved past me and then had to turn to unlace Maeve’s dress from the back. Small, perfect breasts, with the pinkest nipples I’d ever seen. All the while, Maeve was giving me the once over, and she was too preoccupied to notice that my attention was distracted by the princess, and not her.

I unclipped the bra, and slid it off.

“May I see that?” Maeve asked.

“Sure,” I said, handing it to her.

“Such delicate lace! This is amazing! Oh, if only this fit me, I’d give you a thousand florins for it!”

“I can get them in your size,” I said.

“Can you? Oh my. And why you wear a dress over this is beyond me, it’s amazing!”

“I’d like one too,” Lysandra said.

“They shall be all the rage. How do you… what artisan…?”

I didn’t want to tell, so I just said, “Secret.” And I knew that wouldn’t do, so I stripped off my panties.

My cock sprang out, fully hard, not because of Maeve, but because of Lysandra. Not that Maeve was bad looking. Okay, maybe it was a little of both.

Maeve stared, distracted as I’d hoped she would be. Then Lysandra got her dress undone finally and slid it to the floor.

Maeve definitely wasn’t bad looking. Two hot, naked elves, and me. I was starting to regret saying nothing was going to happen.

“It’s huge,” Maeve said.

“Let’s get your portrait done,” I said.

“Oh. Yes, of course.” She moved to the bed. Lysandra moved back, out of the way. I took my phone out of my bag.

She lounged on it, her head propped up by one arm, her red hair flowing over her breasts, covering one. She brushed it out of the way. Her legs were together, one knee just in front of the other; her bush was so red it might have been on fire.

I started taking pictures.

“What are you doing?”

“All part of the process, your majesty,” I said. “It, um, helps me imagine the edge of my canvas.”

“Ah, for your preliminary sketch.”

“No need for a sketch,” I said. “I have a photographic memory.” It was, in some sense, literally true.

“A what?”

Oh, yeah, I supposed that didn’t translate. “Eidetic memory.”

“Oh,” she said. “Why didn’t you say so? Still, shouldn’t you sketch, some?”

I shook my head. “No. It would interfere with my memory.”

Lysandra had moved closer to me, and I realized she could see the screen of my phone. Well, it couldn’t be helped. I took a few pictures. “Move around a little,” I said. “So we can see what pose looks best.”

“How would you like me?” Maeve asked, her voice dropping a few notes. She was keeping her eyes on my cock.

“Don’t ask,” I said. “Um, try the other leg in front. And maybe put it a little more forward.” I wasn’t an expert.

She obeyed, and in the transition I caught a glimpse of dewy wetness. “How long will it take you for the portrait?” she asked.

“Well, I should have a few preliminaries for you to look at in an hour,” I said.

“You work very fast,” Maeve said.

Jill had said something like that about how quickly I’d acquired four wives.

Lysandra leaned so close I could feel her breath. It was distracting, and if I had to use a pencil and paper I don’t know that I’d have been able to concentrate well enough. I took a few more pictures, and then said, “Okay, that’s all I need.”

“That’s all?” Maeve asked.

“That’s it,” I said cheerfully, reaching for my clothes.

“But you didn’t last ten minutes!”

“That’s all I need.”

“But I blocked off hours to spend with you, Abby.”

“Well,” I said. “I’ll be back in less than an hour, I expect. With some, uh, preliminary sketches, if you will.”

“Oh,” Maeve said. “I’ll be waiting.”

“I shall guide you to your room,” Lysandra said.

“First, get me dressed again, Lysandra,” Maeve commanded.

“Of course.”

So Maeve got dressed, and I got dressed, and only after that did Lysandra cover up her beautiful naked body.

In the hall, outside the royal chambers, Lysandra said, “It’s even bigger than I remember. You must have been really turned on by her majesty.”

“Not Maeve,” I said. “You.”

“Flatterer,” she said. And then, a few steps later, “Really?”

“Really.”

“If only I wasn’t promised to the Archfiend. But then, I suppose it would never fit inside me anyway. Still, what a way to go! I would die happy, if it was your rod that slayed me!”

“We’d make it fit,” I said. “I mean, babies come out of that, right?”

She blinked at me. “You’re thinking of human women. Elves lay eggs.”

“They, um, do?”

“You don’t know anything, do you?”

“I know lots of things. But they are different things than the things you know.”

She nodded. “Well,” she said. “A word of advice. If you try to put that thing in the queen, and she gets injured, it won’t go well with you.”

“I wasn’t planning on it.”

“Good.”

“May I watch you work, when we get back to your suite?” Lysandra asked. “It seems fascinating so far.”

“No,” I said firmly.

She pouted at me.

“I’m going to figure out a way to free you from the Archfiend, you know,” I told her. “Until then… I have secrets.”

She made a face, and then nodded. “Very well, Queen Abby. I’ll be waiting just outside.”

I made sure the door was closed, and then got the printer out of my bag of holding, along with the marine battery that was going to power it. I wished I had been able to get a super-size one, but it would have to do.

Connecting my phone to it using Bluetooth, I printed out each of the photos. Then, after I put the printer away, I knocked on the door.

Lysandra came in immediately.

“So,” I said. “What do you think?”

“That’s amazing?” she said, scanning over them. “So fast! But they are so small.”

“I can make a big one. But I have to do it back at home.”

“She won’t like that.”

“It’s the only way it’s going to happen. I can’t make it happen any other way. Given that, will she refuse?”

Lysandra shook her head. “No. She’s unpredictable, but I don’t think she’ll say no. Especially if you can also get her that, what do you call it?”

“My bra?” I indicated my chest.

“Yes. That. I can tell you right now they are going to be all the rage.”

“In that case.” I stripped off my dress, and put on a skirt instead. A black skirt, to match the black bra.

“Oh my,” Lysandra said, fanning herself. “Do you really think you can save me from the Archfiend?”

“I’ve got an idea. It should work.”

Lysandra smiled. “You’re very different, Abby. I think I might actually believe you.”