CHAPTER 142: CHAPTER 142: IT’S NOT THAT I DON’T WANT IT, I JUST DON’T DARE TO HAVE IT.

"Sienna!"

Mother Johnson roared her name, her voice so loud it was clear she was furious. Is Madam Johnson genuinely concerned about me, or is she just livid because her plans for her adopted daughter have been thwarted? Sienna wondered cynically.

"Sienna, why must you be so stubborn? Can’t you listen to anyone else’s opinion? I am your mother; you are my own flesh and blood. Would I ever do anything to harm you? The most important thing for a woman is to marry a good man. What kind of good man would agree to marry into a family?"

Sienna Johnson looked at Mother Johnson. Mother Johnson’s expression was earnest; if not for all the past hurt and neglect, Sienna might have truly believed her words and been moved. Unfortunately, all these empty words were merely for the sake of her adopted daughter.

"I will not let Father’s lifetime of hard work fall into the hands of an outsider!" Sienna replied resolutely.

"Sienna, Sabrina is your sister too. How can she be considered an outsider? Why can’t you two sisters get along peacefully?" Mother Johnson looked at her reproachfully, as if the discord between Sienna and Sabrina Johnson was entirely Sienna’s fault.

"Grandma, I’ve rested enough. I’ll go to the mourning hall to be with Father." She didn’t want to say another word to Mother Johnson, so she threw back the covers and tried to get out of bed.

Grandma held her hand, stopping her. "Your father will be buried tomorrow. You need to rest well today. You’re his eldest daughter; tomorrow, you must also shatter the basin for him."

"Shattering the basin" refers to the ritual of breaking the earthenware basin used for burning paper offerings before the deceased. This basin is called the "Yin Yang Basin," commonly known as the "Mourning Basin," but also the "Auspicious Basin." This ceremony is very important. The one who shatters the basin is usually the deceased’s eldest son or grandson—someone very close. If there are no sons or grandsons and another relative must perform the ceremony, this ritual can bring that person closer to the deceased, even establishing inheritance rights. The basin should ideally be shattered in one go; the more pieces, the better. According to custom, this basin is the deceased’s pot, and the more shattered it is, the easier it is for the deceased to carry. The moment the earthenware basin shatters, the coffin bearers lift the coffin, and the formal funeral procession begins.

By asking Sienna Johnson to shatter the basin, Grandma was also declaring Sienna’s status in the Johnson family to outsiders. After all, Sienna was still young, and a girl; Grandma had to support her.

"Grandma, I understand."

Yes, I can’t break down. I must hold on until the very end, she resolved.

"Good girl, you’ve been wronged." Grandma wiped a tear from the corner of her eye, gently patted Sienna Johnson’s hand, and felt a deep sense of guilt towards her eldest granddaughter.

Sienna Johnson offered a faint smile, as tranquil as a landscape painting. "I’m doing this willingly. I don’t feel wronged!"

"Sienna, don’t you dare regret this!"

Mother Johnson looked at her daughter, her eyes filled with disappointment. So this is what happens when a child isn’t raised by your side. Even her own flesh and blood feels distant. In contrast, my adopted daughter, with whom I share no blood ties but raised from a young age, is much closer to my heart.

"I won’t regret it!" Sienna stated firmly.

Mother Johnson spun around angrily and stormed off, while Sienna Johnson remained expressionless.

The strained, distant relationship between mother and daughter was not what Grandma wished to see. Looking at Sienna Johnson’s overly stubborn face, she sighed softly and gently advised, "Sienna, she is your mother, after all!..."

"Grandma, I’m tired..."

Sienna Johnson lay down, turning her back to Grandma and pulling the covers up over half her face. She didn’t want to discuss the matter any further.

Sigh... Another weary sigh from Grandma. When did strong Grandma start sighing so easily? Sienna wondered.

With the soft click of the door closing, tears welled up in Sienna Johnson’s dry eyes again. In a voice barely audible even to herself, she whispered, It’s not that I don’t want it; it’s that I’ve been denied so many times, I no longer dare to ask.

「...」

"Sienna, wake up. It’s time to get up..."

Kiki entered Sienna Johnson’s room to wake her. After calling her name for quite some time, Sienna finally stirred, opened her eyes, and stared blankly at the dark, gloomy sky outside.

"What time is it now?" she asked, her voice hoarse.

CRACK! RUMBLE... A clap of thunder tore through the sky, and then rain began to pour down heavily. SPLASH! Sienna Johnson could hear shouts and bustling sounds from the courtyard. To think it would rain so hard on the day of Father’s burial.

"It’s already seven o’clock in the morning."

"What? Seven o’clock? It’s that late already?"

Sienna Johnson felt as if she had only dozed off for a moment; she hadn’t expected to sleep for so long. Outside, a fierce wind suddenly began to howl. The sky was so dark and overcast, it resembled the dead of night, blurring the boundary between day and night.

"Isn’t the burial today? This weather is so awful; this can’t be good," Kiki said worriedly.

In Sileria City, weddings and funerals were conducted with great care and adherence to tradition. It didn’t matter if there were strong winds and heavy rain; even if it were hailing, once the appointed time for the burial arrived, the deceased had to be laid to rest. Missing the auspicious hour was considered unlucky.

"How’s Curly Baby doing?"

"She’s been a bit under the weather lately and eating less."

Kiki wasn’t sure if it was due to not being acclimatized, but ever since Curly Baby arrived in Sileria City, she had been under the weather. Her appetite had diminished, and her chubby little face had thinned down, making Kiki so distressed she often cried.

"I haven’t been able to look after her much recently. Please take good care of her for me. The house is crowded and chaotic with so many people around right now. You and Curly Baby should stay in your room and try not to go out," Sienna Johnson instructed worriedly.

"Yes, alright."

Sienna Johnson longed to go see her daughter, but she had woken up late and truly had no time.

Today was the important day of the burial, and Sienna Johnson had to wear mourning attire. According to the customs of Sileria City, she needed to be dressed in white from head to toe, her clothes unhemmed, with a hemp rope tied around her waist.

Kiki took Sienna Johnson’s white mourning cap, helped her put it on, and then adjusted her clothes. As Kiki accidentally touched Sienna’s hand, she found it very cold, and Sienna’s complexion looked alarmingly pale and unwell.

"Sienna, you must take care of yourself."

Everyone attending the funeral offered her condolences, telling her to mourn appropriately and accept her loss. But unless one experiences it personally, how can they truly understand the pain of losing a loved one?

Father Johnson had been Sienna Johnson’s only source of warmth in the Johnson family. Now that warmth was gone. Sienna felt an icy chill, a cold that permeated her from head to toe.

Stepping out of the room, a fierce gust of wind hit her squarely in the face. Sienna Johnson’s mourning cap was nearly blown off; she quickly pressed it down, bracing against the wind.

The Johnson family’s house was an old residence, hundreds of years old. At this moment, white funeral banners fluttered everywhere, and people dressed in white bustled about. The sky was dark and gloomy, casting an eerie and somber pall over the entire Johnson estate.

"Miss, can you please try to persuade Grandma? The weather is terrible today, and she’s insisting on joining the funeral procession."

Kathryn hadn’t been able to persuade Grandma herself and had been waiting for Sienna Johnson. Now, perhaps only Sienna could change Grandma’s mind.

"If Grandma wants to go, let her go."