CHAPTER 69: SHOULD I STOP?

The evening air was cool, and the streets glowed with streetlights, their yellow warmth flickering across the windshield as Jake drove Bella and little Timothy home.

The hum of the engine was steady, rhythmic, and inside the car it was peaceful, so peaceful that little Timothy had dozed off, his head lolling to the side, his lashes dark crescents against his cheeks.

Bella sat next to Jake, though her gaze kept flickering to her son’s sleeping face. Every time she looked at him, her heart softened with contentment.

Timothy looked so peaceful, and after a day of laughter, ice cream, running around the park, and dinner, he deserved to rest.

She took a quick glance at Jake, thinking he was probably focused on driving but then Jake’s eyes, sharp yet oddly gentle in the dim glow, caught hers.

Immediately, a familiar jolt rushed through her veins. She quickly looked away, her stomach tightening. Why did being in the same car with him feel so dangerously intimate? Was it because of the fun they had being in each other’s company or was it because they’d spent too much time together?

They drove in silence for the rest of the way, until Jake finally pulled up in front of Bella’s house. He shifted the gear into park and turned off the engine. The sudden quiet was deafening.

Bella exhaled softly, careful not to wake Timothy, and turned her head toward Jake. "Thank you," she said quietly, her voice carrying sincerity she couldn’t hide. "For today. I... even though I didn’t want to go out, I have to admit I really enjoyed myself."

Jake’s lips curved into a slow smile, his eyes searching hers. "I enjoyed myself too," he said, his tone low and steady. His gaze lingered longer than it should, and then he added, almost under his breath, "Being out with you today... with Timothy... it just sort of made me think."

Bella’s brows furrowed, her pulse kicking up. "Think? Think about what?" she asked, though her chest already tightened with unease.

Jake shrugged, though his eyes didn’t waver. "Well, about how nice it would’ve been if we’d been a family. Even though Timothy’s not mine, I just couldn’t help it."

The air shifted instantly. Bella felt the words like a blow, like something she had been running from for years finally catching up to her. He wished Timothy was his? He considered and thought of him as his family?

Her fingers clenched around her thighs as though grounding herself. "Jake..."

He leaned slightly closer, his expression unreadable yet intense. "I know it sounds weird but Timothy just makes me wish I didn’t do what I did.... maybe then I could someday have a son like him. I just...." he let his words trail off.

Bella swallowed, not knowing what to say. "What did you do and why are you regretting it now? Is this the first time you’ve thought of having a family? You didn’t like it?" she asked, her voice barely audible.

"Yes," Jake said without hesitation, his gaze still holding hers captive. "I’m just starting to consider having a family and it’s all because of you."

Her breath caught. It was her? Did he like her? Did he wish she was his family? What did this even mean?

"When I first saw you, five years ago... I mean after that day you were crying, I knew I wanted you," he went on, his voice quiet but filled with conviction. "That’s why I tried to find you after you disappeared. But today, with little Timothy running around, with the three of us laughing, playing and eating together... Bella, it made me want more. It made me want... all of this. I want you not just as my assistant but in every aspect of my life. I want you. All of you, Bella."

Her chest constricted painfully. She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t think. What he said was making her head too heavy to even process anything.

She opened her mouth to speak but no words came out. She tried again but before she could say anything, Jake reached across the small space between them. His hand brushed her cheek, his thumb gliding softly along her lips.

The touch was electric, just like five years ago. Bella’s knees went weak even though she was sitting, her heart pounding so hard she thought he might hear it.

Heat flooded her, memories of that night flashing unbidden before her eyes—the way his hands had claimed her, the way his kiss had left her trembling despite the circumstances surrounding why she’d went to him. She had thought she no longer felt moved by those memories, but now, with just the press of his thumb on her lips, they roared back to life and they made her body heat up from within her.

Her head felt heavy and all she could think of was relive that night. At least, this time, it wasn’t tied to a life or death situation. It would be just pleasure.

As though reading her mind, he raised her face so their eyes were at the same level. "Tell me something," Jake murmured, his voice a husky whisper. "Do you think you like me? Did you ever miss my touch? Did you ever think of that night? Was that why you didn’t forget my face, just like I didn’t forget yours? Don’t you want to feel me in you, again?"

Bella’s throat went dry. Every nerve in her body screamed yes, that she wanted him so badly and had dreamt of him every night, but her mind fought desperately to hold the line she had built for herself.

"Jake... you should stop," she whispered, but her voice was far too weak, trembling like fragile glass. Her voice betrayed her words and saw it.

Jake’s lips curved faintly, not in mockery, but in knowing. His hand slid down, brushing the side of her neck, his thumb tracing her skin there. Then, slowly, he leaned in, his breath ghosting against her ear, then lower—his lips brushing against the sensitive curve of her neck.

Bella’s breath hitched, her entire body prickling, her hairs standing on end. She tried to get a hold of herself but it seemed her body had a brain of its own.

"Are you sure you want me to stop?" he asked, his voice low and dangerous, vibrating against her skin. "Because if you say yes now, Bella... I’ll let you be. So, tell me, Bella. Should I stop?"