My breath catches in my throat. Aya said it without the slightest hint of doubt.

“If I feel anything in conflict with my mission, I’ll ignore it. I am not so weak-minded as that. Nothing within me can shake my own resolve.”

I know when I see how distant she is. I know when I see that she is so detached from her own emotions that they hardly seem to be her own.

She’s telling the truth.

“I’m not human. I exist solely to grant the wishes of others—I am a Box.”

She’s speaking figuratively, of course. Aya is a human with a body—but this is the level of her resolve to live the life she does.

And that’s exactly what she’s doing.

Aya will not accept any other meaning to her life aside from fulfilling her purpose. She will never allow herself to get in the way of her goal. The same goes for those important to her, and even her own death.

She’s a machine. An effigy. An aberration. A Box.

I strive to be the same.

That’s how I’ve tried to create my ideal world.

But seeing how successfully she’s removed herself from humanity, can I really say I would be capable of the same?

“… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … ”

—No way.

I could understand if she had said yes, forgetting Kazu wouldn’t bother her. If numbing my heart was all it took, then I think I might still have it in me, too.

This is different, though. Aya Otonashi is capable of achieving her ends without forsaking her normal emotions.

I can’t do that.

It’s impossible.

When it comes down to it, I’m human.

In fact, I—

“Ngh.”

The instant I think this, the shadows of crime within me go berserk.

Yes. In fact, the pain of these shadows of crime, which I myself created, may already be too much for me.

The shadows of crime I brought into myself in order to Rule will rage within me if I give them an opening. It’s gradually growing worse.

I clench my teeth. Agh, dammit, it’s like cannonballs shooting through my veins. Why is so much pain bubbling up within me? And this is just the suffering I’ve created for myself.

Why am I so mediocre?

Why am I just some nobody who can’t even cause a miracle?

I touch my earrings. I want to change. I don’t want to be that stupid, naive boy again. I want to continue struggling against this horrible world.

But…

But…

But the truth is—

Light. Darkness. The sea. The world. A business hotel. The womb. Hands clasped together. A crying face. A shutout victory. The world. Body heat. Cold. Cold. The tingling of a left hand through a catcher’s mitt. Differences in ability. Envy. Dreams. Confessions. Checking someone’s mood. Cigarettes. Bruises. Trembling hands. Fear. Hatred. Hatred. Hatred. Hatred. Hatred. Hatred. Crime. Punishment. Justice. Crime for the sake of justice. Earrings.

My breath still ragged, I touch my earrings one more time.

When did I get these piercings again?

As I ponder this, the one I hate more than anyone else forces their way into my head. Miyuki Karino.

Rino was incapable of reflecting on her actions. She had no sense that she had done anything wrong. I had no choice but to make her understand; I wouldn’t feel right until I made sure she knew the full weight of what she’d done to Kiri. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have been able to stand the injustice of the world. So I gave her what she deserved. I refused to forgive Rino until I heard her express her sincere regret. All she could do was offer an empty “I’m sorry.” That’s why I never forgave her, nor had any reason to do so. “Please tell me what I need to do,”

she had said. Why can’t you think of that on your own? “I love you. I did it because I’ve always loved you,” she’d said. Shut the hell up. Are you trying to flatter me or something? No, that’s not it. She’s saying it’s all my fault. You’re letting me know that it was my existence that hurt Kiri, aren’t you, you piece of shit? Before I knew it, I was hitting Rino. I couldn’t believe what I was doing. It didn’t seem real, turning violent toward someone I’d known since childhood. It distanced me from my reality. While my body registered the physical impact, the sensation was removed from me, as if it were happening to someone else. The person battering Rino wasn’t me. It was someone else within me, whom I could no longer control. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Don’t be stupid. That’s not how you beg forgiveness from someone who’s hurting you!

It didn’t resolve anything.

It didn’t resolve anything.

There was no way to resolve it.

Without a Box, I was truly powerless.

I knew. I knew what had happened to Rino in the hotel. I knew she had feelings for me. I even knew all the best things about her, like how she was cheerful and easy to talk to, how she was so openhearted with others, how she could be happy when it was time to be happy and sad when it was time to be sad. I knew she wasn’t a bad person. But I couldn’t forgive her. I couldn’t. I just couldn’t.

That created the discord inside me. I shouldn’t have hit Rino, but I also had no other choice. So I split up my image of Rino and erased the part of her that caused me trouble. I forgot she was my old friend.

That was how I condemned her.

I dyed my hair. I pierced my ears. I longed to forsake the “Daiya Oomine” I once was and become someone else. If my affable nature was what had led Kiri to such a fate, then I would do away with that version of me.

I know; you don’t need to tell me.

I’m no superhuman.

I can never be an “Aya Otonashi.”

The only difference between me and everyone else is that I can look at myself from a distance. That’s enough for me.

—That’s enough for me.

I finally fight down the shadows of crime and regain control of myself.

“Is something wrong, Oomine?”

“A-are you all right?”

Aya and Yanagi are talking to me.

“……It’s nothing.”

…What the hell am I getting so upset about?

Yeah, some parts of me are still weak. No need to dwell on it.

If my emotions are going to sway me, then I’ll just have to avert my eyes and ignore them. I don’t have to take them head-on like Aya. I pieced that together long ago, which is why I’ve been doing it all along. It’s why I’ve been able to cut off my emotions in favor of logic. That’s my weapon. I should be proud of my abilities.

“Aya,” I say, now that I’ve collected myself, “going back to what we were talking about earlier. I agree that we should use your Misbegotten Happiness to take down Kazu. Have you already worked out the details?”

“No, not yet. I only just came up with the idea now, after all.”

That makes sense. Scheming is surprisingly difficult for Aya Otonashi. Those squeaky-clean values of hers prevent her from adopting an underhanded approach. Yep, even Aya has weaknesses. There’s no use comparing my abilities with hers.

“Oomine, what do you think?”

“Losing your memories is pretty much guaranteed to get good results. But even if you do erase your memory, it’ll be pointless if we don’t let Kazu know about it, right?”

“Won’t he find out on his own, even if we don’t go to the trouble of telling him?”

“That may work for you, but I don’t have time. I have to show Kazu that you don’t even remember him.”

“Hmm, I suppose you’re right. And that means—”

“Yeah. I need you to use the Misbegotten Happiness right in front of him.”

“I can enter Boxes, but I can’t escape them. If I’m here, then Kazuki Hoshino—”

“I’ll call him into the Silver Screen of Broken Wishes.”

That is the first prerequisite for breaking his spirit.

“What will it take to get him to come here, though?” she asks. “From where he stands, it’s better to destroy your Box from a safe distance. All he has to do is wait for barely two hours. I can’t imagine him taking the risk of coming here, you know?”

“I can take care of that if I use Crime, Punishment, and the Shadow of Crime.”

“Then who should I use the Misbegotten Happiness on?”

“That depends on what Kazu does, but as of right now, there are three of us in here. Which means the best candidate has already been decided.” I shift my gaze to Yanagi.

“Huh?”

“Lucky you, Yuri Yanagi. There was a brief period when you had no reason to be here, but now you get a new role.”

“Um? Um? Oh…”

Yanagi’s face goes pale as she catches my drift.

Seeing this, Aya steps in front of Yanagi as if to protect her.

“…Sorry, but I have no intention of using my Misbegotten Happiness on anyone who doesn’t want help. Not even to defeat Kazuki Hoshino.”

So that’s how it is. I guess that part of her won’t change even when her resolve is this strong. She’s still unable to sacrifice another, no matter how inefficient it makes her plans.

…No, that isn’t surprising, in a sense. If she weren’t like that, it would go against her personal mission of making others happy.

“I see. Well then, I guess we’ll have to find someone else for the job.” I immediately realize I won’t break her on this, so I offer a perfunctory comment to bring us to a temporary resolution.

Aya gives a small nod of understanding.

Truthfully, I hold Yanagi’s shadow of a crime within me, so I can make her beg for salvation just like that. She was hurt badly by the Game of Indolence; if I dig at those wounds, Yanagi will probably be quick to ask for deliverance. Her sins are weightier than the average person’s, after all.

Of course, there’s no need to fixate solely on Yanagi. If all we’re doing is erasing Aya’s memories of Kazu, then we can use anyone who knows him, no problem.

However, I can’t place my hopes on an uncertain third party when I don’t know if they will come or not. If I want a guaranteed sacrifice, it would seem I really do need Yanagi.

Once I’ve thought about this, I return to the conversation.

“I’ll summon Kazu into the Silver Screen of Broken Wishes by the end of the fourth movie, 15 Years Old and Earrings. Then we’ll use your Misbegotten Happiness on someone he knows, right in front of him. If that part’s set in stone, then I guess the issue is how.”

“Right. You say it’s going to work out somehow, but how do you plan to pull it off?”

“Let’s see…”

How about I threaten to kill Aya if he doesn’t call off the Silver Screen of Broken Wishes? The question is whether that would actually persuade him, but chances are high that Kazu would play along for Aya’s sake even if he doubted the threat itself.

So should I relay the message to him using Crime, Punishment, and the Shadow of Crime? I’d love it if I could tell him without any trouble, but it could prove surprisingly difficult to convey it to him reliably in the short time I have left. Damn, if only O would help me, I could be sure he would know—

Do you have a wish?

—No, hold on. I’m forgetting something huge, aren’t I? How did Kazu get ahold of the Silver Screen of Broken Wishes in the first place?

It goes without saying. He got O to give it to him. Kazu went to O for help in order to defeat me.

O is on his side, not mine.

So we know O has already given Kazu a Box. As long as the two of them aren’t at odds in some way I don’t know about, I have to keep in mind that O might come to Kazu’s aid.

Just now, I considered threatening to kill Aya, so let’s say I go through with it. Even if I do succeed in delivering the message to Kazu, can I be sure O won’t screw me over by giving him more information—telling him the threat is a bluff, perhaps? Can I rule that out?

Of course not. It’s more than possible. In that case, I have no choice but to outwit O as well.

O isn’t perfect, but it seems she can see what goes on in the world. There’s a chance she might overhear if I go blabbing my strategy to Aya. However, O can’t read minds. If I keep quiet, I should be able to keep my intentions hidden from her. Just like with a human.

In short, I’ll conceal my real plans from Aya, trick O into thinking the plot puts Kazu at an advantage, and then get Kazu to come to the Silver Screen of Broken Wishes of his own volition. That’s what it comes down to.

…What the hell? That’s way too hard.

“Oomine, you’ve gone quiet. Does that mean you can’t come up with anything?”

I peer into Aya’s face.

It’s blank.

Her emotions are perfectly repressed.

I suddenly recall a few lines from Repeat, Reset, Reset.

“I know what results from asking a Box for such a wish. The outcome is—

“—ruin.

“But then what will I do if you learn of the Boxes anyway and obtain one? I won’t feel inspired to steal it from you. I may not stand against you, like I would against other owners.

“We will be partners again—No, we won’t. I won’t work with you. I don’t want to interfere with your affairs, either. I guess we’ll both just be moving in the same direction. We were never meant to be partners. Our original relationship—

“—was as kindred spirits.”

“……I almost miss it,” I whisper without thinking.

What’s that supposed to mean? I wonder a second later.

What she said to me in the movie—in that reset—pops into my head and then really sticks with me.

—Just what is “Aya Otonashi” to me?

For Kazu, “Aya Otonashi” is the enemy. Kazu wants to make Aya—no, in this situation it’s more correct to say “Maria”—a part of his normal life. That’s why “Aya Otonashi,” the self-proclaimed Box trying to relinquish her humanity, is his greatest obstacle.

But for me, it’s the opposite: “Maria Otonashi” poses the problem for me.

“……”

Problem?

Why?

Will it be troublesome because Aya and I have similar goals? Because we’re working together? Because she was once my partner even in the Rejecting Classroom? …I get the feeling it’s something different. None of these fit the bill.

I need her on a much deeper level.

So it must have something to do with my mission.

I think it’s fine if I’m not the one to see this mission through. In the near future, I will collapse under the weight of my sins. When I do, my mission will most likely still be incomplete. I’m okay with that as long as there is someone like Shindo to carry on my will so that the world does eventually change. I don’t care if I’m cast aside like garbage or despised. I don’t even care if I die.

So—

Yeah…I’ve got it. I’ve figured out what Aya Otonashi is to me.

Aya Otonashi is my hope.

She wishes for a world where everyone is happy. If that becomes reality, my purpose will be achieved at the same time. When her wish comes true, so does mine.

And seeing her gives me hope that her wish, a far more difficult wish than mine, might very well become reality.

Her detachment.

Her nobility.

Her righteousness.

Her honesty.

They will save even my wish.

No, it’s not just me.

They will save every owner. She is hope to all of us.

That’s why she has taken O’s name. She will grant the wishes of everyone.

She is a hallowed entity who must be protected at all costs.

That’s why I cannot forgive him.

I cannot forgive Kazuki Hoshino for trying to stamp down our wishes for the sake of his trite goal—his selfish desire—to be with “Maria.”

We have to shatter Kazu utterly.

“I did come up with one plan.”

To that end, I will deceive Aya and O and everyone else so that I can plunge Kazu into despair.

“Maybe we should use Kasumi Mogi.”

Kazu.

I will never let you take back the zeroth Maria.