chapter 312

    chapter 312:

    – layla –

    i lay on my back on the grass, staring up at the clear blue sky. my head rested on a surprisingly comfortable pair of thighs. unohana was giving me a lap pillow, though the thousand-year-old shinigami wasn’t entirely pleased with me at the moment.

    that probably had something to do with the fact that, about an hour ago, i’d casually dropped the bombshell that i had a harem with ten other lovers and four children. subtlety wasn’t exactly my strong suit.

    “your family and world seem lovely,” unohana said, gazing down at my face. her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes, but i could tell she was at least making an effort.

    that was something.

    i let out a pleasant sigh as her fingers threaded through my black hair, her touch was soothing as she massaged my scalp. “yeah... i haven’t had a situation where any of the women have gotten into big fights yet,” i explained. “we all get along pretty well. that might also be because we kind of all have sex together...”

    i felt her fingers pause for just a second before resuming. there was a brief silence, broken by a few amused “ara aras” and even an “oh my” that made me smirk.

    “you have quite an exciting life,” unohana said, her voice tinged with something almost wistful. then she added, “i’ve spent the past thousand years mostly in the same place here in the soul society. i’ve never really explored anywhere. i’ve barely spent more than a few months in total in the land of the living.”

    i tilted my head slightly to look up at her. “that’s probably for the best. earth has kind of sucked for humans for all but, like, the past couple hundred years anyway. it especially wasn’t great for women,” i pointed out.

    unohana nodded thoughtfully at that. “the soul society doesn’t really have that problem,” she explained. “here, everything is determined by how much spiritual energy a person has. gender means nothing in the face of power like that.”

    unohana continued massaging my scalp as we talked. her fingers moved in steady, practiced circles, and i couldn’t help but sink further into her lap. it was almost enough to make me forget she wasn’t entirely thrilled with me right now.

    “what is your world like?” she asked, her voice soft but curious. “would i even fit in there?”

    i opened one eye to glance up at her, smirking a little. “of course you would,” i said. “my world’s a crazy place. heroes and villains constantly popping up, fighting in the streets, or trying to save the day. you could fit in anywhere you wanted. go out and fight crime if that’s your thing, or open a clinic or hospital and put out miracle cures all day long. you’d have people lining up around the block.”

    unohana’s fingers paused for a moment, and i caught a flicker of thought crossing her face before she resumed the massage. “that sounds... like a lot.”

    “it is,” i admitted with a chuckle. “but it’s got its perks. my sister gabriel and my niece asia, they’re almost as revered as i am. they go to entire hospitals and heal everyone inside every few days..." i kept telling her more and more about “earth marvel dxd.”

    [we’re gonna need to come up with a better name for it...]

    ...

    ...i woke up what felt like a few hours later, still resting my head on unohana’s lap. i guessed i must have fallen asleep at some point. smiling up at her, i felt a flicker of peace, but it didn’t last long. my smile faded as i noticed we weren’t alone anymore.

    “good, you’re awake,” unohana said softly, her fingers still idly combing through my hair. “you have visitors.”

    sitting up, i blinked in confusion as several members of squad 11 stood nearby, looking uncharacteristically nervous.

    my gaze drifted downward, and that’s when i saw it.

    a body.

    kenpachi zaraki’s body, lying motionless on the ground. his chest was completely caved in, and he wasn’t breathing.

    “shit,” i muttered under my breath. i realized in that moment that i had killed him with that punch earlier—the one that sent him flying right out of the soul society.

    the squad 11 members began begging me all at once, their voices overlapping in frantic desperation.

    “please, bring him back!”

    “we’re sorry for whatever he did! he always causes problems, but he doesn’t deserve this!”

    “captain zaraki’s the heart of squad 11! we need him!”

    i glanced over at unohana, who let out a long sigh. “i didn’t waste my life training up that big lug just for him to end up dead from a single punch,” she said. “bring him back please.”

    i nodded. “yeah, yeah, i got it. don’t worry.” standing up, i walked over to kenpachi’s body, pulling back my foot. “wake up, you lazy bastard,” i muttered before kicking him hard in the side of the head. his body rag-dolled through the air, though nowhere near as far as when i punched him earlier. he crashed into a nearby wall, the impact causing it to crumble into a pile of rubble. “and layla scores...” i muttered to myself, giggling playfully as the squad 11 members all looked at me in horror for what i just did.

    kenpachi started pulling himself out of the rubble, looking completely fine but visibly disoriented. “oi, what the hell happened?” he demanded, rubbing his head. “the last thing i remember was meeting the old fart and all those other stuffy captains...”

    “you died, genius,” i said, crossing my arms.

    kenpachi frowned, processing that for a moment. then he let out a low growl. “...died? just like that? damn it, that’s pathetic.” he stood up fully, brushing off the dust and cracking his neck. “next time, it’ll be different. me and yachiru—i mean, nozarashi—won’t lose so easily.”

    i waved him off dismissively. “it’s fine. he got better.”

    ichigo sputtered, clearly struggling to process that information. “what do you mean ‘he got better’? that’s not how—wait, how did you even—”

    ignoring the barrage of questions he threw at me, i turned my attention to o?etsu nimaiya. “so,” i said, placing my hands on my hips. “where’s my zanpakuto??”

    o?etsu cringed slightly before gesturing for me to follow. “right this way,” he said, his voice a bit strained.

    i wasn’t expecting that kind of reaction. “what’s with the face?” i asked, quirking an eyebrow.

    he avoided my gaze. “you’ll know it when you see it.”

    instead of leading me into his workshop, like i expected, he brought me to... his house? i blinked, glancing around the modest structure as i stepped inside. politeness won out, and i slipped off my shoes before following him further in. he led me through a simple but cozy space until we reached the kitchen.

    sitting at the table, snacking on crackers, was an absolutely adorable little girl. she couldn’t have been older than seven or eight. she wore a white kimono, just a shade paler than her skin, and had long white hair cascading down her back. her gray eyes lit up when she noticed me, and i couldn’t miss the fluffy white angel wings sprouting from her back.

    “momma! i knew you’d come!” she cried, crumbs flying out of her mouth as she bolted out of her chair and latched onto the bottom of my shirt in a tight hug.

    “mama?” i muttered, looking down at her in surprise. “i guess i’ve got another one...”

    [heh. leave it to you to have a zanpakuto? that is literally just an angel.]

    “not just any angel,” i said quietly, examining her closely. despite her small size and only having two wings, she radiated an overwhelming power. it wasn’t spiritual energy exactly—it felt more... conceptual.

    the girl finally let go of my shirt and smiled up at me. “hello, little one. what’s your name?” i asked her.

    she didn’t answer right away. instead, she grinned cheekily at me before a flash of white light engulfed the room. when it faded, she was gone. in her place was a brilliant katana, practically glowing as it hovered in the air. i reached out instinctively, grabbing the hilt. it felt unbelievably soft, almost like holding feathers themselves, but i knew the blade was impossibly sharp. more than that... it was powerful.

    “tenshi no sa?ba?,” i said, her name coming to me instinctively. angelic sever. the blade’s power was as beautiful as it was terrifying. it could sever bonds... on a conceptual level.

    [holy shit!!! asdfgh!!!! its power is absolutely horrifying! you absolutely can never, ever tell people what this blade can do! in fact, don’t freaking use it ever!]

    ''why are you freaking out?'' i asked the system in my head.

    [that blade of yours can permanently sever a gamer system from its host! you’ve never met other gamers because you’ve stuck to your multiverse, but remember when i told you most of them are pieces of shit with massive egos? if they find out you can take their powers, they’ll all declare war on you!]

    i rolled my eyes. “i’ll be careful...”

    [you better be!]

    with a wave of my hand, i used creation of all things to manifest a sheath for the blade. “ten-chan,” i said, deciding on her nickname.

    o?etsu was watching me critically, arms crossed. “tenshi no sa?ba?, huh? the only zanpakuto? i never made myself. what’s it do?”

    i stuck my tongue out at him. “it’s a secret.”

    “ah, man. now you’ve got me really curious.”

    “too bad,” i said, sliding ten-chan into her new sheath. “i’ve got a meeting with the soul king now.”

    o?etsu’s expression shifted, replaced by something much more serious. “so you do... i’m sure senjumaru is waiting to escort you. a word of advice, the soul king is probably not going to be what you’re expecting, but he’s very important. don’t you dare harm him!”

    i rolled my eyes. “it’s not like i was even planning on meeting him. i’m sure everything will be fine...” with that, i headed back outside...

    ...

    a half hour later...

    “puchi!”

    ...everything was not fine.

    the soul king had definitely not been what i''d been expecting. not that it mattered in the end because he was now very much dead.

    my new zanpakuto?, tenshi no sa?ba?, was currently impaling him through the heart. the palace around us started violently shaking as the soul king’s connection to his realm, along with the entire world, was severed with his death.

    [welp, that happened...]

    xxx