The Most Random System
Chapter 33: First, Second, From Then On, Finally, I’m Not a Pervert
CHAPTER 33: CHAPTER 33: FIRST, SECOND, FROM THEN ON, FINALLY, I’M NOT A PERVERT
"I’m a guy, you’re a girl, do you get that?"
Chen Yu Ying heard this opening line and experienced a brief moment of brain freeze.
"Huh? Uh." She voiced her confusion, then absentmindedly nodded: "Yeah! Uh-huh, I get it. Huh? Wait, what else could it be?"
So many interjections displayed the girl’s mind full of question marks at that moment.
She was indeed waiting for something big, but not this kind of big.
Lin Li sighed; the mission hadn’t been completed yet. As expected, he still had to do the most beastly thing of explaining this himself.
He took a deep breath, and then exhaled.
Though millions stand in my way, onward I shall go!
A true man stands among heaven and earth, how could he remain low for too long? Birth to humble beginnings isn’t shameful, being adaptable makes a man a true man. I’m not afraid of the system’s little trap for me, the biological education task won’t be the death of me ah ah ah ah!
But before going on, Lin Li still had to say a word, "System, I curse you!"
"No, you still don’t get it," Lin Li shook his head. "First of all, I’m not a pervert, and second, remember my first point—I’m really not a pervert."
Lin Li continued to back away, increasing the distance between them while layering armor on himself.
Chen Yu Ying: "?"
"Now, let me explain the differences between men and women!
Men, although they have no advantages, do have one long asset! And women, on the other hand, not only lack length but also have one shortcoming. But men and women are actually fair, as women have not one, but two advantages!
Now, let’s analyze why the combination of men and women is most fitting by nature? The answer: men like to grasp the two advantages of women, using their own asset to compensate for women’s shortcoming!"
Chen Yu Ying: "???"
Chen Yu Ying was stunned, staring blankly at Lin Li, while Lin Li also looked at her—or actually, at the imaginary system interface between them, silently praying.
A few seconds later, the system popped up a message prompt: [Mission Five Completed.]
Hooray!
I’m a genius!
The great victory of a young genius!
It turned out, because Chen Yu Ying already understood this knowledge, he only needed to guide her to think in this direction, scientific popularization was successful even without carefully describing the organs like a junior high science textbook.
However, before Lin Li could start celebrating, he covered his ears first.
"Ah!!! Pervert!!" Nearly simultaneous with the system message, was Chen Yu Ying’s blushing face and scream.
After all, mission completion meant Chen Yu Ying completely understood Lin Li’s meaning.
Sigh, even though he had just layered armor, she still called him that.
Why did I keep backing away, creating distance? It was to give her a bit more sense of security.
The remaining boy and girl in the classroom instantly turned their attention this way, looking towards the corner where the two were.
The boy even immediately stood up, seemingly wanting to play hero, opening with, "Class monitor, what happened? Did Lin Li do something to you, need to call the teacher?"
See?
This is why Lin Li and people like him can’t hang out together.
They call the teacher at the drop of a hat. Lin Li hates two kinds of people the most — those who tattletale and those who prevent him from tattletale.
Lin Li ignored this classmate named Wang Yuezhi, instead explaining to Chen Yu Ying:
"Class monitor, calm down, calm down, there is a reason why I said what I did just now. Don’t rush, I will explain it to you, and you will understand." From a distance, Lin Li extended his hands in front of him, trying to soothe her.
Seemingly realizing she had shouted too loud, Chen Yu Ying quickly covered her mouth, her face blushing.
She turned to look at Wang Yuezhi, waved her hand: "It’s nothing."
Wang Yuezhi reluctantly nodded and sat back down, but Lin Li could notice that his gaze was still sneaking glances his way.
Heh, unrequited love, but lickspittle gets no good end.
At this moment, Chen Yu Ying returned her gaze to Lin Li, still indignant, with hands at her hips, demanding: "Give me an explanation."
"The tape is in Bai Bufan’s lower drawer, there!" Lin Li, quicker with his mouth than his mind, blurted out the lousy joke, noticing how Chen Yu Ying’s recently calmed face flushed again.
The color changes were quite sensitive, felt like it could be hung on the road as red and white lights, heh, kind of fun.
Darn it, now wasn’t the time for this.
"Not that tape!"
"Ahem, it’s like this, class monitor, what I said before was a necessary lead-in for the upcoming explanation, to emphasize one last time, I’m really not a pervert," said Lin Li.
Yet the skepticism in Chen Yu Ying’s gaze did not fade.
Normal people wouldn’t repeatedly stress they’re not a pervert.
"The following content needs to be said quietly, I’m afraid of eavesdropping, would you like to sit down?" Lin Li, now at the back near the storage cabinet, found it tiring to talk and manage the volume from there.
Thus, he walked back to his spot, pointing to Bai Bufan’s chair and spoke.
Perhaps it was curiosity surpassing the fear of perverts, Chen Yu Ying still sat down, hearing that a lady only sits halfway on a chair, but she sat on the half far from Lin Li, didn’t seem very ladylike.
Wang Yuezhi’s gaze grew more intense from nearby.
Whispering with your goddess, kill you with jealousy, just this NTR feeling, so satisfying.
However, the pressing task was to salvage his reputation.
"Class monitor, you surely understand the meaning of what I said earlier, and that behavior, more precisely that desire, often leads to certain crimes," Lin Li said seriously and earnestly, "And what I assisted the police in cracking down, was a case about this aspect."
"The incident was like this, not long ago I found those small deliberately scattered cards on the ground, you might have seen them too, I was very interested in them—wait! Don’t call me a pervert again, I’ll emphasize one more time, I’m really not a pervert.
What I’m interested in is not the kind of sensual X appeal you think."
Pre-emptively judged, Chen Yu Ying pursed her lips, skeptically indicating Lin Li to continue.
"At that time, my thought was to bring those responsible for these cards to justice! So I started investigating and collecting information, eventually finding a shop corresponding to one of the cards, then I used my after school time and weekends to stake out, take photos, gather information, and even interview customers.
Eventually, through my efforts, I finally gathered enough decisive evidence, rushed to the police station to report. With the information I provided, they easily dismantled the operation behind these cards! Because of this, they came to the school today to find me through the principal, to commend my deeds."
"Really?" Though Lin Li concocted this story, the fresh and astonishing news still stunned Chen Yu Ying, who asked in surprise.
"Of course it’s true. I suppose the commendation letter is already posted on the bulletin board downstairs, class monitor, you can check it yourself. But it doesn’t mention those case specifics, it only says I helped the police, because this stuff isn’t appropriate to say outright."
Chen Yu Ying nodded in amazement, thinking that since the bulletin board was mentioned, it must be true.
Great, she believed it, Lin Li was quite pleased.
There was no way he could tell Chen Yu Ying the real version.
Bai Bufan might not care, but he did.
"But I have one more question," Chen Yu Ying asked.
"What?"
"Then why did you have to say those creepy comments about male and female assets before this case?" Chen Yu Ying asked, confused.
"Firstly, I’m not a pervert, then the reason I already said, it’s to let you better understand the cause of this case, it’s a necessary preamble, class monitor, it’s with the best of intentions, lastly, I’m really not a pervert," Lin Li said with heartfelt sincerity.
Chen Yu Ying wanted to nod, but something still seemed off.
No, that’s not right.
Lin Li could have simply stated the case details; she would have understood.
The talk of differences between genders seemed completely unnecessary prologue!
Seemed like a pervert trying to rationalize their perverse behavior.
Chen Yu Ying paused, looking at Lin Li with a dissatisfied tone, feeling not getting the truth, "You like backstories so much, why didn’t you start from when Nuwa created humans?"
Lin Li paused, then nodded:
"It is said that Nuwa used mud to mold humans after her own form, creating and structuring human society..."
Chen Yu Ying: "You really started saying it!"