CHAPTER 60: CHAPTER 60: PAST [6]

Evelyn opened the first page.

— July 14, 2010.

— YES! I got to eat fried meat today! It was great! It was wonderful! And it was also a friend’s birthday at the orphanage! It was really really fun! Hahaha!

"Pftt."

The villainess giggled.

Who would have thought that the first thing that caught her eye would be a literary disaster?

They had no connection at all.

The scribbles were ugly.

But they were full of innocence, joy, and positivity.

A happy child.

Flip.

— January 1, 2011.

— Happy New Year! I got to eat dumplings today! They were delicious.

"Oh."

She raised her eyebrows slightly.

Her red lips also curved elegantly.

It seemed like Kael’s diary entry frequency was once a year.

"Sure enough, childish."

Flip.

— September 8, 2020.

A whole eight years in the future?

What the fuck?

This time, Kael’s handwriting looked much more mature, beautiful, and neat.

— Today is a beautiful day... Is it because I’m officially entering high school today? To be honest, I didn’t have many good memories in elementary and middle school, so... WISH ME LUCK!

Flip.

— September 10, 2020.

— There are no words to describe my joy today. Why? Heh, because today, I made 5 friends! That’s a record!

Flip.

— September 12, 2020.

— We did a lot of fun things together, and these people are really good people. They didn’t show any disdain or annoyance when they found out I was an orphan. Moreover, they’re quite rich! I believe we can become good friends!

The villainess let out a small smile.

She felt happy for Kael.

Because at least her beloved had a few friends.

But... for some reason, Evelyn always felt that something was odd.

Flip.

— October 1, 2020.

— ...How should I start? Um... today wasn’t a very good day. My friends dared me to snatch a kid’s balloon... but I didn’t.

— Will they hate me for what I did today?

— I hope not.

5 friends.

Flip.

— November 11, 2020.

— I was wrong. Those 5 people are not my friends. They are assholes... demons. They are bullies, always bullying others in the dark.

— I want to leave this group. But... can I? I’m already too deep in this mud...

— No!

— I have to try.

Evelyn paused.

She could vaguely guess what would happen next.

She wanted to stop.

Nevertheless, the villainess couldn’t.

Flip.

— November 15, 2020.

— Fuck... It’s gotten so bad that I can’t do anything else. I want to go back in time... to change my choices.

’What happened?’

Flip.

— December 4, 2020.

— Another day of being beaten by them. The wounds are so painful...

Flip.

— Another day...

Flip.

— Another day...

Her speed of flipping through the book became faster.

To the point where it was impossible to keep up with the naked eye.

Flip.

— Another day...

Flip.

— Another day...

...

Flip.

— February 2, 2021.

— What should I... do? Every day is hell for me... It hurts... It hurts... It hurts... Please stop...

Evelyn could feel that some parts of the page were quite damp.

Kael had cried.

He was sad.

And so she was sad.

Flip.

— February 10, 2021.

— I want to die. Should I die? If I die, will I be freed?

The villainess closed her eyes, then let out a long sigh.

It felt so suffocating.

She didn’t want to read any more.

This time it was for sure.

With that, Evelyn closed the diary.

"Let the past be the past."

***

After a while, perhaps because of boredom, Kael tiredly sat up.

"Finally."

His room was pitch black, there was really no light at all.

Just like his fate.

Kael stood up, then slowly walked towards his desk.

He sat down, grabbed the diary, and opened it.

"Let’s continue writing."

— Today was another day of terrible bullying. It hurt.

— I don’t want to go through this pain again.

...

— Should I use that method?

Standing nearby, watching, Evelyn couldn’t help but frowned slightly.

She didn’t know what method Kael had just mentioned.

And she wanted to know.

He stopped writing, staring at the last line.

His mind was filled with thoughts.

Should he do it, or shouldn’t he?

...

Kael’s eyes flashed with a sharp light.

+

Question: How to survive in hell?

Answer: Adapt to it.

+

***

Having determined that, Kael immediately threw the diary aside, then took out the book that he had always hidden so carefully.

The moment it was taken out, the villainess’s two ruby eyes widened.

Obviously, she couldn’t believe her eyes.

Why?

Because...

— 4 ways to brainwash yourself.

That was the title of the book.

And what’s even crazier was that Kael actually possesses such a thing.

This proved that he had thought about this for a long time.

What exactly did Kael have gone through to dare to brainwash himself?

If possible, Evelyn wanted to stop her darling right now.

Because she knew very well that brainwashing was an extremely risky and stupid act.

But unfortunately, at the moment, she could not influence this world.

Kael took a deep breath, then opened the first page.

"Wow..."

It didn’t have too many words.

Fantastic.

+

Step 1:

Prepare the "belief bait".

To brainwash yourself, you must have a core idea to stuff into your head.

+

"Core idea?"

Kael curled his lips.

He had a bunch.

— Pain is pleasure.

— I love pain.

— Please keep hitting me.

— Harder, more fierce!

...

Step 1.

Finished.

Flip.

+

Step 2.

Repetition and Self-Suggestion Loop

The human brain is very affected by hearing, seeing or repeating information many times, especially when the mind is weak or stressed.

+

Without hesitation, Kael wrote down those "core ideas" he had just come up with on hundreds of different sheets of paper.

And when they were all finished, he pasted them all around the room.

Because that way, no matter what Kael was doing, he would always see them.

"I am such a genius."

Kael smiled.

It was horribly distorted.

***

When she saw this, Evelyn somewhat understood Kael’s intentions.

Everything was already too clear.

If she still couldn’t see it, then she was an idiot.

His purpose was to... force his brain to believe that he was a masochist.

The villainess had always had a question.

Why did Kael smile so pervertedly when she was strangling him?

The answer was simple.

Because he was a masochist.

But it wasn’t until today that Evelyn realized that he wasn’t a natural masochist.

Kael was a lunatic.

A lunatic who had brainwashed himself.