My kingdom was renowned for the clarity of its stars.

They said that every twinkle was a nod from the heavens. And since I existed, it was no mystery why they glittered at the pace of hummingbirds illegally pecking at my window. 

Their gratitude was clear to see. 

So long as I was there to pick up the slack when the sun shamed itself for another evening, they could continue to reinvigorate themselves on my smile as I tiptoed my way to the royal kitchens.

But not tonight.

No … instead, my stars were threatening to fade into the ether.

After all, they clearly believed they’d arrived too early. 

“Heheh … heheheh … ahahahahaha … !!”

I couldn’t blame them.

It was akin to looking at the centre of a hearth. 

Shades of gold silhouetted her dancing flames. A shroud of unnatural radiance which engulfed Marina’s figure like the pyre of a burning angel, wilting the air around her. 

The herbs fared worse. 

Whatever a loitering fae in my kingdom hoped to grow, it had all become embellishment. 

Every leaf, flower and blade of grass floated upwards as embers in the shape of fluttering butterflies, dribbling tiny trails of flames behind as they danced to a song of calamity.

“I am the end of hubris,” she stated, her voice resonating better than any devil in a child’s body ever could. “For I have tested the flames of the very hells. And I have declared them insufficient.”

She raised her gaze.

The stars refused to meet the challenge of her radiant eyes. And so the dancing butterflies answered instead. 

They came together as she lifted her palms, melting together like sparks flowing back into a forge. 

What they created was something no artificer could forge. Magic pooled together to form the shape of a grand sceptre, its newly made heart of flames beating in the form of a crystalline orb.

My hands clenched together.

We’d found our mage of the hour at last.

Even so, it was clear that with each passing moment, the magic empowering her was only becoming greater. Whatever those eyes brimming with their own hint of flames saw in the heavens, they’d yet to see what was directly in front of her.

Meaning … I had only a single chance.

I drew Starlight Grace from my side.

“Coppelia,” I said with a nod. “Miss Lainsfont is wreathed in so much fire that even the stars themselves shy away. Regardless, we cannot falter. She is distracted. Do you understand what needs to be done?”

“I do.”

My loyal handmaiden took in the growing flames with a rare look of seriousness.

She promptly delved into her pouch, searching through all the oddities of various danger levels, before eventually taking out the most severe.

A stale apple strudel.

I duly accepted via the tip of Starlight Grace.

“Heheheh … ahahahaha … !” Marina cackled into the night. “I … I have carved a path of destruction where no angel has walked before! There is no inferno which can surpass me! There are no tears which can douse me! All is now the wind of despair, fed by the weak, the wretched and every fool to have cast my name into the dirt!” 

“... Ooh, ooh! I think that’s enough!”

“Truly? It’s only been a moment.”

“Mmh~! I’m pretty sure that’s more than enough. Look, you can see the syrup bubbling!”

“Oh my. You’re correct.”

“All who have ever wronged me shall join together in a purgatory of regret! My flames shall scour every blemish from under and over this world! Let all that is foul tremble before my light, and all that is good weep before my shadow! There will be a renewal, a reforging as I quench the mistake of the past! I will thoroughly … thoroughly …”

“... Well, Coppelia? How does it taste?” 

“Amazing. It’s even better than normal!”

“That cannot be right. For one thing, I don’t believe it’s evenly toasted.”

“That just makes it better! The charred bits are like magical seasoning. It’s got that oak barrel quality to it.”

“Please, that’s just silly. Magical flames cannot possibly be that refined.”

“Try it! You’ll realise for yourself! Here, have a moss–”

Pwam.

All of a sudden, a foot stamped on the ground. 

“... Why are you two here?!”

Where before was an expression of maddened triumph, now there was only utter grief. 

The flames emanating from her became wild and uneven. Which was terrible.

I was using them.

“Oh, don’t mind us,” I said as I adjusted a goblin moss cake at the tip of my sword. Not for me, of course, but for Coppelia. “By all means, please continue the speech. We’re listening.”

“Are you using the cursed flames exuding from my bare soul to heat food … ?!” 

“No … I’m using the cursed flames exuding from your bare soul to ensure my personal finances become less perilous. Every pastry and moss cake I save means another premium apple I can purchase. And goodness knows we somehow never have enough of them.”

Outrage flickered across Marina’s face.

I agreed completely. How the bags of crowns we regularly requisitioned from ruffians kept disappearing, nobody other than the fruit vendors would know.

“I am not a stove!”

“Clearly not. Stoves are more stable. Otherwise this moss cake would already be finished.”

Fwoooosh.

A lash of flames slapped across the tip of my sword, leaving a charred pebble behind. 

The fact that a goblin moss cake was sturdy enough to not simply disintegrate was both highly impressive and also slightly worrisome. 

I’d eaten one.

“Why are you here?! How did you get here?! This … This is the village of the witches!”

“No, this is the home of a fae merely dressed like a witch, who I very much hope by her absence means she’s opted to depart.”

Recognition was slow to come. But come it did.

“This … This is not where … why am I here?!”

“Presumably so that you can cause one final act of chaos, courtesy of a child ordinary in every way other than the fact she never once sneezed on me.”

Marina’s eyes widened. The silver within them threatened to overflow. 

“The little wretch

,” she said, the flaming ribbons whipping around her as well as any dancer from the Dunes. “She … She sent me into the bottom of the abyss! Into the very hells! It. Was. Awful! … Where is she now?! I will murder her … and then I will murder her once she comes back!”

Coppelia nodded enthusiastically. 

Sadly for them both, there would be no murdering … probably.

“You may consider the fact you haven’t started throwing fireballs as she doubtless hoped for to be a far greater triumph. It’ll certainly need to suffice. She’s gone.”

“Gone? What do you mean gone? Where has the brat gone?”

“Likely where you just came from. I sent her back into the fiery abyss. I defeated her.”

Marina’s jaw dropped.

Finally. All it took was our 15th meeting before she finally did the next best thing to a curtsey.

“You … You defeated a devil?”

“It was a horrific fight,” I said, my eyes shutting tight as I looked away, brows creasing against the weight of the memories. “I scarcely survived with my life. There were infernal flames, living nightmares and shadows colder than ice. It was amazing. But also grim. My sword had to contend with the strength of a devil unveiled, its claws unrestrained by any notion of mercy, its jaws bloated upon countless centuries of blood, violence and malevolence.”

Coppelia poked me.

“You forgot to mention the giant pit fiends she summoned.”

“Yes. The giant pit fiends. It was terrible. I was almost overwhelmed. If you believed your time in the hells was slightly easier than imagined, then it was likely entirely because she spent all her power summoning her most powerful allies to her side.”

Thwunk.

A newly summoned scepter dropped to the ground with a heavy thud, such was the weight of her shock.

She stepped back, her eyes becoming ever wider with disbelief and … oh my, was that respect? Acknowledgement? Appreciation?

A long moment passed as she pursed her lips. 

Even so, the proof of my words were clear to see. There was no giggling devil. And that was enough. Especially when I could get around to bribing an entire village of witches.

“... Common logic states this cannot be true,” said the woman currently on fire, her teeth almost grinding together. “But common logic also states that you cannot defeat a lich. Or me, for that matter. Once is luck. Twice is a coincidence. But three times is deliberation … perhaps I was mistaken to think you simply stumbled from one disaster to another without a plan.”

“Yes,” said Coppelia, blinking rapidly. “Everything we do is always planned.”

“Ohohoho … my loyal handmaiden who suffers from a rare pollen allergy speaks truly. Every step we take is always carefully prepared in advance. All the more so when witches are concerned.”

Marina blinked.

Suddenly, she turned towards a fae portal which was no longer there.

“T-The witches,” she said, her flames spluttering along with her voice. “I came here for the witches. What of them? What happened to … did you meet a witch who looked like me?”

I raised an eyebrow.

“My time with the witches didn’t involve meet and greets, although it’s possible I met one who resembled you. Still, if it’s a particular witch you seek, then you may rejoice.”

“What do you mean?”

“The last I saw, the witches were being released from their plight. The barrier around their village shattered upon the devil’s final tantrum. I can’t say that no harm came to their ears, but they appeared otherwise unharmed.”

Marina stared at me.

Then, after a long pause, her shoulders relaxed … alongside the faint diminishing of her flames.

“I see … of course. They would be kept safe. Every single one of them. A devil cannot wilfully harm those who summoned them. Good. This is good …”

I said nothing.

But little else was needed at this point. 

Ohohohohohoho!

Indeed, just as it was before, there was no curse I couldn’t soothe! 

As a gentle princess, my famed smile was more than simply a shield! Mine was enough to quench even the primordial flames wreathing the Witch of Calamity who sporadically appeared just to doom my kingdom’s barns like a passing dragon!

Clearly, Miss Lainsfont had a significant amount of concerns. 

For one thing, there was still the matter of her long term residency on Soap Island. But that was something I could arrange once I’d resolved the issue of her curse. 

Now that the witches were free from the clutches of a problem child, they could assist in the matter while pleading their case to my tax inspectors.

Yes … that’s right!

Everything was fine!

So long as she had no reason to succumb to the curse, I could shortly be on my way back home!

Poooomph.

Which was why … as the sound of something exploding occurred in the cottage next to us, I wasn’t the least bit concerned!

“Ack … uck … uhh …” 

A fae countess promptly stumbled out to a cloud of fumes at her back. 

Looking up, she offered an unconcerned smile as she brushed the soot from her attire. 

“... Ah, I see you’ve both returned! Excellent. This is perfect timing. Were either of you able to come into contact with the witches?”

I raised my palms in exasperation. 

“Excuse me? Were you inside the whole time?”

“Yes.”

“Well, did you not notice someone was on fire? Look, she still partially is!”

“Indeed, I can see that.” The fae leaned forwards, academic curiosity in her eyes as she studied something other than what I was directing her to. “My apologies, I was in a delicate situation. My temporary workstation isn’t suited for industrial production, but I had several outstanding orders to fulfil.” 

The flames suddenly began to rise. I desperately blew at them.

“You’re still producing those ridiculous dyes?!” asked Marina, her tone aghast.

“Of course,” replied the fae, oblivious to anything which wasn’t an outright demand. “Maintaining cordial relations with the local populace allows me to conduct my research in peace. Speaking of which, would you be willing to offer me a sample of your hair?”

“My hair?”

“Yes. I notice it’s significantly changed. As it’s impractical to ask you to stay, may I instead request a sample of your hair so that I can better replicate it?”

The fae pointed at what Coppelia and I had wisely chosen not to mention.

Marina looked down at once. 

She lifted several strands of her hair, then awkwardly tilted her head only to glean the fact that it was no longer just the ends which were luminous. 

It was the entire thing.

Pink. Red. Orange. Yellow.

Like all the shades of a grapefruit, her hair was constantly changing. And unlike the previous time I’d expertly calmed her with my smile, it wasn’t going away.

In fact … it was only becoming more varied.

Marina dropped to her knees in despair. 

Despite a fresh shroud of flames engulfing her pitiable figure, it failed to diminish the latest colour to streak up from the ends. It was as golden as the crowns I spent simply to appease a gluttonous horse and clockwork doll for another hour.

If they were already full.

However, unlike the pure lustre of my hard earned funds, there was no joy to this hue.

Only a harsh radiance which began to bleed into the very flames surrounding her. 

The light engulfed her, gleaming in the same bleak manner as the forgotten artifacts bundled in the back of the royal vault, each remaining polished by sheer virtue of the way the various evils within managed to usefully ward away the dust.

A moment later–

Even her eyes turned golden.

I nodded at the unusual sight … then pointed at the blinking fae.

“Everything that’s about to happen, the Fae Realm is paying for.”