The day was losing its light and night was on its way. My feet hurt running for such a long time not knowing where to go. People along the road passed me and looked at me scornfully as if I were mad.

    "Don''t walk near her Hun," I would hear them say pulling their child close to them.

    Not being able to bear it anymore, I ran across the road into the forest away from everyone. I had soon lost energy and sat next to a tree, resting my back on the large tree trunk. Tears streak down my cheek, sad and tired of bad things happening to me. I thought leaving Phyllis''s cell I would find peace at last, but it only got worse every day. I cursed the day I was ever born into this world. I did not understand why I was conceived into this world to suffer. I would never be happy, I thought.

    I dived my face into the palms of my hand.. My face became soak from my tears. I gently removed my hand from my face hearing the thunder rolls, worrying about it raining. I had nowhere to go, no shelter. It just keeps getting worse and worse.

    "Ah!" I shouted angry as hell, raising my head into the sky.

    The thunder rolled even more, and the lightning began to flash. Suddenly these words escape from my mouth. "I hate you Christian nor did I need your help!" I shouted as I standstill.

    "I don''t want you to protect me, for you only cause my life to be worse!" I shouted, even more, falling to the ground.

    I laid on the ground covered by dead brown leaves on my back, looking in the sky sadly as hot tears continue to streak down my eyes. Why do these things keep happening to me? I thought as raindrops fall onto my face gently until it started to hit against my face even harder as it falls heavily.

    I gave up on life, I thought as I now lay on the muddy ground soak. Covered in mud and dead dried leaves, watching every drop of rain falling hitting against my face. I did not care to run from the cold rain finding a shelter, for I had made up my mind. It would be much better if I were no longer here. Dying would be the best thing for me. I got up, now sitting on the ground, plotting away on how I could end my life.

    "Ah!" I screamed angrily pulling my ugly red hair and pushing it from my face scornfully. I never liked my hair and my eyes. I hated that every time Phyllis looked at me, she would always see my rapist father. She will not be seeing me anymore, I thought. I was going to put an end to my sad life now.

    I got up, walking further into the forest. The rain had finally stopped and only started to fall a little.

    I looked around the place clueless about where I was going searching for a way, I could end my life. I wanted to find a place where I could jump off and die quickly without feeling too much pain. I pulled myself angrily as I walked. Why is everything so difficult for me? I questioned myself. I could not find any spot I could jump off and kill myself. I stopped falling onto the ground. I had no more energy to move about. It was like my body too gave up on me. It too was tired of being abuse and treated badly. I lay on my back, not caring I was on the wet floor and my hair was covered in mud.

    Suddenly I heard a soft soothing sound. Like a lot of water running somewhere. I jumped up quickly, holding onto a tree trunk beside me, pulling myself up, slowly walking towards the sound of water. My eyes widen surprisingly seeing a pond filled with water. It was beautiful. I stood still staring at it; knowing what I was about to do. I got close to it, allowing the cold water to brush against my toes. My body trembled by its touch. I walked into the water until it reached my neck. I ran out quickly, afraid.

    My heart raced within my chest, terrified. I could not do it. I could not kill myself. I thought thinking about doing so would be easy, but it was not. It was difficult. I sat next to the pond staring at it. I wanted to die but was afraid to do so. I cried looking at the pond.

    Moving away from the pond would be pointless, where would I go anyways and if Phyllis finds me, she will once again place me within a cell. I got up making my final decision. I looked up paying close attention to a tree towering over the pond. I got close to the tree climbing up and went over slowly to a large branch that hangs over the pond. I laid on the large branch on my belly staring into a deep part of the pond. At least I will not try to flee from the river, I thought. I knew I could not swim if I jumped in this time.

    Tears streak down my eyes as I stare at the deep-water; knowing what I was about to do was wrong, but I had no choice but to. I was alone and had no one to love or protect me. I closed my eyes, spinning my body around now hanging from the tree, and slowly let go of the branch. My eyes widen frighteningly as I fell into the pond about to drown. I felt water entering my body through my nose and mouth, as I slowly went deep within the pond.

    Suddenly I saw a man with long red hair as red as mine, diving into the water approaching me. I watched the young man as my eyes slowly close not seeing him anymore.