CHAPTER 973: 970TH CHAPTER: "SYMPHONY NO 6 IN A MINOR

"I used to think," the person said, "that as long as I became a deity, I could bear everything and fulfill everything for them."

Su Ming’an remained silent.

"They needed to survive, so I granted them survival. They needed trade, so I found ways to open trade for them. They needed to fight, so I controlled their battles," the person said. "For me, the sixty years in Yun Shang City were too long. More than once, I felt guilty for the dissipating lives, and more than once, I wished for my life to end or to fall into an eternal slumber."

"But at the moment you pulled me down, I suddenly realized that those sixty years of godhood felt like a vague, unreal dream."

"It seemed as if I loved them so deeply that I had nothing left, yet I felt this love was through a layer of something, more like watching a fire across the river. It was love for a void-like image or a symbol elevated above ’people.’"

"Now that I have become Su Rin once again, this love has become more intense, as if it has returned to its true form."

"However."

The person said nothing more.

Su Ming’an was silent for a long time before he slowly spoke: "...Although I don’t know the reason, you couldn’t go home."

Su Rin remained silent. Under the sunset so intense it seemed sticky, his pupils had a golden quality, making them seem unreachable.

"Pulaya no longer needs a deity."

After a long silence, a voice almost like a sigh was heard.

Su Ming’an didn’t know what kind of mood Su Rin must have had to say such words.

He must have been extremely proud, believing that becoming a deity could protect everyone. Or maybe, extremely self-aware, realizing that Pulaya no longer needed the character of "Su Rin." He had cared for, protected, and deeply loved this land for eighty years, a homeland tantamount to a lover that he couldn’t leave, yet suddenly, there was no longer any "necessity" for him.

"It was me who pulled you out; I’ll send you back." Su Ming’an said.

Su Rin turned his head, looking at Su Ming’an with a rare, bewildered gaze: "The World Game is already over, Su Ming’an. You can no longer send me back."

Su Ming’an shook his head: "It’s not over, I’m still in it."

Su Rin said: "I don’t think you’re crazy, so you must have a reason for saying that."

Su Ming’an laughed; even the counterfeit Su Rin was the only one who could truly understand his feelings. After all, they were the same kind of people: "Yes, I feel lucky."

"Lucky?" Su Rin pondered for a moment: "Lucky that—the World Game has ended, and the current conclusion satisfies you. Or lucky that—the World Game hasn’t ended, and you still have a chance to change the conclusion?"

The two looked at each other for a long time.

Neither of them spoke.

The damp long wind lifted their similar black hair, and in their similar eyes reflected similar gazes.

As if an invisible bell chimed at this moment, Su Rin suddenly understood Su Ming’an’s gaze: "You’re really... even going to save me?"

You said you would bring everyone home.

Now everyone has gone home.

Yet you still want to do better, to send me home as well. Or, you want to recover even more.

How much more will you bear?

How much more will you bear?

Su Ming’an?

But in Su Rin’s eyes, the reflection of Su Ming’an slowly spoke:

"Don’t take yourself too seriously."

"I don’t want to save you."

That’s why they are so alike, even reluctant to accept each other’s praise.

Su Ming’an turned around, the Jiang Shui splashing, white pigeons perched on the blue and white railings, fishermen shouting as they haul their nets, distant ship horns sounded. These blue, pure white, colorless sounds, scenes, mortal world, and smiles harmoniously coexisted at this moment, abundant and vivid, as if meeting for the first time, or reuniting after a long absence.

In the long wind, Su Rin stood with both hands in his pockets, watching the young man leave. His khaki trench coat swayed in the wind. Perhaps he was reminiscing about wearing a khaki trench coat in the Ruined World, seeking traces of his homeland in a foreign land. Perhaps what he remembered was exactly Pulaya’s blue sky, where azure and pure white beautifully merged, the fisherman casting his nets, the faint sound of a boat’s horn—

—And that day, a young man came from a scene of azure and pure white from afar, holding the Sword of Yarman, and met him for the first time.

That was the beginning of everything.

Now the young man is still on his journey.

He said he would bring him home.

Su Rin chuckled, standing with his back to the young man. He continued to gaze at the boundless Jiang Shui below. Su Ming’an’s hometown is some distance from the sea, so Su Rin lingered by the river, nostalgic for the past.

He didn’t want to be too far from this patient. Although he would never say this reason out loud.

...

Su Ming’an went to Noel’s home.

This wasn’t Noel’s home in Yu Country, but a new one Lv Shu and others had made for Noel, right next to Su Ming’an’s apartment building. The room had a refrigerator filled with the sweets Noel liked, children’s photos, and colorful glass ornaments.

Su Ming’an sat in this room for a long time until the night completely fell.

He had the illusion that Noel seemed to be in this room, breathing with him.

He didn’t know why this future was without Noel.

Lv Shu said Noel didn’t make it out of the game. So they built a memorial room for Noel, filled with the things Noel liked.

Su Ming’an wandered inside the room and saw Noel’s crow placed in the garden. It was a life-sized replica plush crow. He leaned against the huge crow, feeling a strange warmth, as if it were a sun that didn’t emit light.

He saw the wall covered with children’s photos, not real images, but portraits painted by Yamada Machiichi in realistic style. They were all the children Noel had taken care of in the New World Guild. By now, they should be growing healthily somewhere in the world. Even though the children no longer remembered that during a year’s time, there was someone named Noel who had cared for the lost them until they safely emerged from this brutal game.

He suddenly noticed flowers growing in the empty garden. Not planted by Lv Shu and others, but flowers that grew on their own. Maybe a white bird flew by and accidentally left seeds, or maybe a long wind carried the vitality of flowers here.

Lush and brilliant sunflowers.

Su Ming’an gazed at these sunflowers clinging to the walls. In the empty room, only the children’s photos reflected light. With no one to care for these flowers, they blossomed wildly and recklessly, climbing over the low walls, over the door frames, almost arrogantly intruding indoors.

They climbed all the way until they got close to a photo pasted at the top of the wall—a blonde boy smiling brightly, making a "peace" gesture toward the camera. The sunflowers paused their rampant growth at the edge of this photo, quietly blossoming into a flower at its border.

Even Noel’s flowers grew vigorously yet with restraint, much like him.

"..."

Su Ming’an picked a sunflower and placed it on the crow’s forehead, as if laying something to rest in his heart.

Under the night sky, the garden of flowers named "Sun" still stood tall. That young boy was naturally skilled at keeping his head high and smiling in the darkest times.

And Su Ming’an slowly bowed his head.

...This possibility, I will not let it happen either.

To the best of my ability.

He turned his back to the garden filled with sunflowers and walked forward.

He still could not hear the voice of the deity, as if the dream had not yet ended.

...

At night, Su Ming’an lay on his bed, silently staring at the ceiling.

Footsteps came from outside as a girl walked in. Because Su Ming’an often went crazy in the middle of the night, Yuanyuan would sleep on a floor mat to take care of him. Lv Shu and others also slept not far away.

Yuanyuan didn’t feel sleeping closely was offensive. She was caring for a patient, taking care of a friend whose soul was kindred to hers. The mundane gaze couldn’t pierce her soul.

Lying in the same room, even the moonlight felt gentle. Su Ming’an kept his eyes open until the rustling on the floor stopped.

The girl lay in bed, her gentle voice rang out:

"In the future, after you graduate from university, let’s travel together. With Lv Shu, No... Lin Yin, Yamada Machiichi, Lu, Mo Yan, and the others."

Due to Su Ming’an’s constant reliance on medication, they never traveled together.

"Okay." Su Ming’an said.

"We can live long-term in Lu’s country or any other country as well. Luna would also welcome us." the girl said.

"I don’t like places that are too cold. Our residence shouldn’t be too cold." Su Ming’an said.

"Hmm, I don’t like it either. Too hot or too cold isn’t good. I really like the four seasons of Dragon Country."

"The place we live long-term, the economy doesn’t need to be too prosperous, just enough for daily living."

"That’s fine."

"Also, transportation doesn’t need to be very convenient. Sometimes, enjoying a slow-paced life is nice too."

"Okay."

"The scenery around the residence can be beautiful, but it doesn’t matter if it’s not. You all are already a beautiful scenery in my eyes. Anywhere, with you all accompanying me, is great."

"Yes, we will always be by your side."

"Near the residence, it’s best to have lots of flowers. I remember Lin Yin likes flowers. If there are delicious foods, that would be nice too. You like to eat snacks of different styles."

"Okay."

"Is there such a place?"

"There will be, we’ll definitely go..."

Yuanyuan’s voice paused.

Her voice was interrupted by Su Ming’an’s movements, as she saw Su Ming’an sit up, his hair disheveled, fingers clenched, with a hint of water glimmering in his eyes.

In the darkness, the youth’s gaze trembled, and his pupils reflected her, reflected the melting moonlight.

"Is there such a place?" He asked again, even his voice becoming hesitant.

"Of course," Yuanyuan said.

This world is vast, and we are still young, there will always be enough time, there will always be places to go.

"Is there? Is there... such a possibility?" he said.

"Of course."

"Will I have... a very, very long future?" he said.

"Of course."

His pupils remained constricted, as if he was listening to a touching and distant fairy tale.

They continued to imagine the future.

She said she wanted to learn more musical instruments, at that time she would be equivalent to a music group by herself, performing for him, it would surely be interesting.

She said Lv Shu recently wanted to dye his hair black, after all, he has now returned to society, no longer a homeless man scorned by others, his white hair always drawing attention, he later wants to become a blade technique teacher.

She said Yamada Machiichi had graduated early, he was determined to come to Dragon Country for a master’s degree, wanting to study psychology, to become a psychologist in the future, to guide more children confused about their gender, he wanted Dong Xue to courageously become Yang Xia from then on.

They spoke bit by bit, like bedtime murmurs, adding bit by bit of their imaginations about the future into this fantasy, like children building sandcastles, until they constructed a future satisfactory to both of them.

The moonlight was silent, the hour hand getting closer to twelve.

Su Ming’an suddenly had a premonition of farewell.

He looked at Yuanyuan, she lay in the warm bed, surrounded by medicine and water. When she saw him looking, her eyes also flowed with melting moonlight.

"Ming’an?"

"Observers can come back, right?" Su Ming’an said.

"Yeah, I’m right here." Yuanyuan said.

Su Ming’an was silent.

After a long silence, he spoke lightly.

"That’s good."

"That’s good..."

At this time, footsteps sounded from the doorway. Lv Shu and Lin Yin, wearing pajamas, walked in: "Su Ming’an..."

No one knew why they had this premonition, but it seemed like Su Ming’an was about to disappear.

Su Ming’an closed his eyes, knowing this was still the deity’s trick, if he "accepted" this possibility, chose not to leave, he would sink completely into this illusion, maybe never to wake up.

... never to, wake up?

He suddenly laughed. He had imagined more than once in moments near collapse, if one day he truly died completely, it might be considered a kind of relief. The current illusion made him feel happy, if he truly sank into this illusion without waking, it would indeed... fulfill a wish that occasionally arose within him.

But.

He slowly climbed down from the bed, moonlight casting onto his face.

Yuanyuan stood up, holding his hand tightly without saying a word, just placing her hand on his wrist. As if to pull him tight or to push him away.

Her eyes remained uniquely hers, with moonlight.

"I’m sorry."

He said.

Slowly moving her hand away, sinking into the melting moonlight in her eyes.

He opened his mouth in the deep sea, saltwater choking his throat, completely sealing the last trace of him making lively, unfamiliar sounds of... possibility.

While swallowing bitterness, he laughed silently saying—

I’m sorry.

I can’t escape.

Yuanyuan’s eyes began to lose color.

"This is the origin of the sorrow in your life." She said.

Everything began to lose color, Lv Shu’s sweatshirt, the drawing board in Yamada Machiichi’s hand, Lin Yin’s guitar, Mo Yan’s wooden sword, and Yuanyuan’s eyes... clear, beautiful, moonlight that makes one want to cry.

"But I bless you, with a glorious spring day... Ming’an."

The future gradually constructed by the two collapsed.

A twisted vortex reappeared in Su Ming’an’s vision, gulping down bitter seawater, little by little he was dragged into the deep sea by an indescribable burden. What was dragging his feet? He understood clearer than anyone.

Su Ming’an.

Who is Su Ming’an?

Hearing his own heartbeat, feeling his scorching tears, he understood the answer to this question more than ever.

Like falling into the deep sea, the seawater assaulted his senses, infinite pain shattered everything before him, Yuanyuan and the others’ figures shattered and vanished.

He stumbled forward, eyes full of dizzying black and white colors, yet he caught nothing, unexpectedly splashed warm blood on his face—who did he think he could hold on to?

Perhaps not even the organizers thought anyone could confront them as a mere mortal.

So this mortal never thought this road would be so difficult.

He opened his eyes in this drowning deep sea, seeing the silent deity before him. The deity’s expression remained unchanged, the clock on the wall only ticked a minute, it was as if Number One Player had really just taken a brief, untrue daydream.

He breathed rapidly, his chest still retaining warmth and real feeling.

The multicolored flowers bloomed in his heart, while the figures of people were eternally stored there, never to fall no matter what.

He felt very light, as if he had been solidified into a shell named salvation. Yet he felt very heavy, countless lives sinking in his heart.

He didn’t know.

——A dream of returning home, how could it touch him so greatly.

He didn’t know.

Perhaps he knew.

"Do you feel despair?" the deity said: "Its name is HE·After Returning Home. No one remembers your contributions, no one remembers who you are, you even lost your most trusted friends. This is your future... I made you have a nightmare, sorry."

Su Ming’an’s eye corners were dry, without a single tear.

He felt his life like a film without ending, not even a brief dream could appear in its plot.

Drink wisdom, like piercing the Sword of Yarman. Unable to escape, unable to sink. Should be tolerant to the world, no matter love or hate.

The Savior willing to suffer bears the expectations and criticisms of the people—

Thus, flowers bloom everywhere.

After a long silence, Su Ming’an spoke very lightly and gently.

"Deity."

The deity watched him.

"I..." Su Ming’an said:

He looked at the moonlight outside the window. Flowing, clear, like her moonlight.

"I really like this story."

The story you told me, a story unique to me.

I really like this...

He closed his eyes, restraining his suffocated, moonlight-like smile.

...fairy tale.