CHAPTER 18: A KISS? AGAIN?!

[Leif’s POV – Morning, Thorenvald Estate, Leif’s Chamber of Doom]

There are many moments in life one never expects... and yet, somehow, we live through them.

Like the first time you bite into what you thought was chocolate—only to discover it’s raisins.

Like tripping in public and deciding the best solution is to fake your own death on the spot.

Like waking up to realize...

YOU ARE WRAPPED AROUND THE MALE LEAD OF THE NOVEL LIKE A GODDAMN OCTOPUS IN HEAT!!!!

. . .

. . .

Fuck!!!!!!

His chest—hard as iron. His arm—firm around my waist. My leg—oh gods, MY LEG. Draped across him like I owned him. His chin rested against the top of my head. His heartbeat thudded against my ear.

This wasn’t a sleeping position. This was a MARRIAGE CONTRACT SIGNED IN SWEAT AND BLANKET FOLDS!!!!!!

I tried to move. Slowly. Carefully. Gracefully. The kind of elegance that would make even swans weep.

Except...

"Mm," He tightened his grip.

TIGHTENED. HIS. FUCKING. GRIP.

Like I was some teddy bear he bought at the market and refused to return.

My soul left my body.

No. Absolutely not. This is illegal. Against the laws of nature. The rainbow baby inside me shrieked, ’WARNING! DANGER! HUSBAND MODE ACTIVATED!’

I tried again. This time, stealth mode. Ninja mode. Assassin in the night. And then... the blanket betrayed me. Slipped down. Exposed my arm.

Cold air rushed in. I shivered. He shifted again—except instead of letting go, his hand splayed wide against my back. Pressing me closer.

I stopped breathing.

WHY?! WHY DOES HE HOLD ME LIKE I’M A LOST TREASURE HE REFUSES TO LET GO?!

This isn’t fair. This isn’t safe. This isn’t—

"Leif."

His voice rumbled. Low. Half-asleep. Too close to my ear.

I died. Buried myself in the grave of my own shame. "Y-yes?"

His eyes stayed closed, his brow relaxed. And yet—he murmured, "Stop squirming."

STOP. SQUIRMING?!

EXCUSE ME?! WHO STARTED THIS SQUISH FEST?!

I tried to wiggle like a caterpillar performing interpretive dance, but his arms were too damn strong. Like steel chains dipped in smugness.

"Grand Duke... p-please... let... go..." I wheezed.

Nope. Nothing. His grip didn’t loosen a fraction. In fact—he SMIRKED. Eyes still closed. I saw it. I swear on my nonexistent dignity—I SAW IT.

This man. This demon in human flesh. This icy-blooded, unfairly hot menace.

I was pissed.

This is sexual assault! To a gay man! By the hottest man in the empire! Unfair! UNFAIR!!

I tried again. Louder this time, desperate. "I know you’re awake! Just let me gooo—"

And that’s when he did the unthinkable. His eyes opened. Cold glacier blue. Drilling straight into me. He stared for longer and then...

"... Can I kiss you again?"

. . .

. . .

WHAT?!

I froze. Then rebooted. Then blue-screened.

"KISS?!" I squawked. "What—? Are you INSANE?! Who wakes up and says that kind of thing?! You—you—!!"

Adrenaline powered my limbs. I shoved him. Hard. So hard that His Grace, the Almighty Grand Duke, actually rolled right off the bed.

THUD!!!

The sound was so satisfying I could have bottled it and sold it as medicine.

I sat up, glaring down at him. "I don’t know what possessed you to say something like that, Grand Duke... but my feelings are not a joke and my lips are not auctioned to you."

He groaned faintly, sitting up on the floor with all the dignity of a fallen snow king. His expression was unreadable.

My chest tightened. Rage and... something else swirled.

"Ever since I told you I like men," I snapped, "you’ve been teasing me. Watching me. Testing me. Do you still think I’m lying? Do you want to catch me red-handed, like I’ll suddenly trip and confess, ’Haha, surprise! I liked women all along’?"

I laughed bitterly. "Or is it something else?"

"Leif...I..."

I sighed, ruffling my hair, "I don’t want to know. But what I do know is this—" I leaned forward, fists clenched in the blankets. "I won’t let anyone fool around with me. Not even you, because this is not a fucking game."

Silence fell.

He stared up at me. Eyes unreadable.

And I... swallowed hard. Because deep down, no matter how much my anger flared, one truth kept gnawing at me.

This was dangerous.

Alvar Ragunlfsson wasn’t just anyone. He was a straight man. A male lead. A man with a destined partner chosen by the damn author herself.

And I—I was just... me.

A misplaced reader, thrown into someone else’s story.

This world? It’s filled with straight men. Straight men with wives and mistresses and a whole harem of concubines if they wanted. Straight men are destined to fall for women prettier than rose gardens and twice as dangerous.

And a gay man like me who has fallen into a wrong script?

...I can only survive; I don’t have any right love in this world.

That’s it. That’s the ceiling. Survival. Not love. Not destiny.

I sucked in a shaky breath. "Please don’t—" I said, my voice sharper than I intended, "—don’t say things like that, Grand Duke. A kiss. Again. As if it means nothing."

My chest ached. My throat tightened. "Because to me... it doesn’t mean nothing."

Silence.

A silence that pressed heavier than the thick winter snow outside.

Alvar was still on the floor. Watching me. I could feel his gaze—the way it sliced through me like a blade, even when I refused to look at him.

And then—

KNOCK! KNOCK!

The door creaked open, and in walked Nick. "My lord, did you—"

He froze mid-step. His eyes went wide. His jaw dropped. Because what did he see?

The Grand Duke of the Empire sprawled on my floor. And me. On the bed. Red-faced. Hugging the blanket like it was my last shred of dignity.

Nick blinked once. Twice. Then—

"...GRAND DUKE—ALVAR!!" he yelped, panic exploding in his voice. "WHAT HAPPENED?! WHO DID THIS TO YOU?!"

Alvar, infuriatingly calm, pushed himself to his feet and brushed off invisible dust as if he hadn’t just been bodied by me. His voice was smooth and controlled. "It’s fine. I simply fell. It’s not a big deal."

"FELL?!" Nick squeaked like a strangled duck. His eyes darted from me to Alvar, suspicion written all over his face. "You... fell. On the floor. In the Count’s chamber. Beside his bed."

"...Yes," Alvar replied, already bored.

I shrieked from the bed, "STOP MAKING IT SOUND SCANDALOUS, NICK!"

Nick just stared harder, lips twitching like he was one breath away from gossiping across the entire estate.

Before I could die from sheer humiliation, Alvar cut through the chaos with that deep, cold voice: "Nick. Prepare my bath. And clothes."

Nick flinched and bowed, still side-eyeing the two of us like he’d stumbled into forbidden territory. "...Y-yes, my lord."

Then, to my horror, his gaze flicked to me. "Would you... like to bathe as well, Lord Leif?"

I dragged the blanket over my face and groaned. "Yes. But I’m going to the hot spring."

Nick blinked. "The hot spring?"

"Yes. The hot spring. Alone. With steaming water and zero witnesses. Do you have a problem with that?!"

He snapped upright. "N-no, my lord! Of course not!"

And just like that, Alvar and I went our separate ways—he to his bath, and I to the hot spring.

But as I stomped off, clutching my dignity with both hands, I swore I could still feel his gaze burning into my back.

***

[Leif’s POV – Thorenvald Estate, Hot Spring]

"Hahhhhhh... this is heaven."

The words melted out of me as I slid into the steaming water of the hot spring. Muscles loosening, soul unclenching.

This time, I had backup. Five of my crimson babies, lounging with me like furry little bodyguards. Security detail. Emotional support wolves. Call them what you will, but this way....no Mr.Frosty will come near me.

One of them licked my cheek, tail wagging furiously. I burst out laughing. "Haha—are you having fun, huh?"

They threw their heads back and HOWLED in unison, the sound echoing off the stone walls. My personal hot spring choir.

"Right, right. Sing your joy," I muttered, sinking deeper into the water with a dramatic sigh. "Because unlike you fluff balls, I had to deal with a Grand Duke today. And he—he pissed me off."

The babies howled like they agreed.

"...Though," I grumbled, staring up at the steam curling toward the ceiling, "he has been acting weird lately. Especially after that kiss..."

I slapped my own cheeks under the water. "NOPE. Not thinking about that. Out. Gone. Vanished. Goodbye!"

To distract myself, I muttered, "After this, I should check how many greenhouses are ready. But the real problem is the stone... Ugh. Will those Imperial siblings come to oversee the project today?"

A splash.

I blinked over.

One of my crimson babies had dunked his entire head underwater, tail and butt sticking up in the air like a furry buoy.

Meanwhile I?

I leaned back, arms sprawled, head tipped against the edge of the spring. " We’ll need to strike a deal with the Crown Prince, but with what? I wish—" I let out a world-weary sigh. "—we could just magically stumble across some resource that makes us rich overnight."

Then my little buoy-baby popped his head back up from the water. Something gleamed in his mouth. He paddled over, tail wagging furiously, and nudged me.

"Huh? What’s wrong, sweetheart?"

He nudged harder. Finally, he dropped something heavy into my palm.

I blinked down. "...A rock?"

It wasn’t just a rock. It was utterly, impossibly black. So dark it looked like it swallowed the steam around it.

"Well..." I scratched my cheek, squinting at it. "This is my first time seeing one this color."

I smiled and ruffled his wet fur. "Thank you so much, my baby~ You’re the sweetest."

Then, without thinking twice, I plopped the rock back into the water. The crimson baby froze. His tail drooped. His ears flattened. His whole wolf soul screamed betrayal.

"Awww, don’t be sad." I immediately showered him with kisses and pats. "I don’t need gifts from you. You’re enough for me. You’re my greatest treasure."

He whimpered, unconvinced.

I chuckled, squeezing his fluffy cheeks. "Silly baby. Honestly, what am I supposed to do with a rock?"

...

What I didn’t know—what none of us knew—was that this wasn’t just any rock. That utterly black stone sitting quietly at the bottom of my hot spring... was no ordinary rock at all.

And someday soon, it would change everything.