CHAPTER 664: CHAPTER 664

His avoiding my attempts for a caress, us not having even a moment to talk leisurely about the concerns we still haven’t cleared out properly, Karina’s words... his reaction to Karina’s closeness just now... it all made me unable to gather the energy to be crazy and demand his explanation. It felt useless... it felt stupid.

"... Is it your health? Or... Have I bored you with words? Maybe I did something—"

"No... I..." — I interrupted him. Not wanting him to finish the question because I don’t feel like I want to answer honestly. — "I believe I have not rested well. I think it would be best for me to go back."

"... would you like me to call for Talmhach?"

"No, that is completely unnecessary."

"Then... let me accompany you to your chambers." — He stood, offering his hand. Waiting for me to take it as support... but... I truly did not want to. I refused to. Feeling how in my heart tears made it throb. Tears I was not showing but feeling intensely inside.

"I think I will go on my own... I do not want to infect you with this gloom I carry today." — Standing without taking his hand, I made a reverence trying to leave fast. Yet his hand reached out, stopping me... solely for the second it took me to shake his touch off.

"My lady—!"

"... Sorry. You took me by surprise."

"... Did I do something that upset you?"

"No, your highness."

"Then was it indeed that woman who—"

"Your highness." — Interrupting him again, I managed my emotions as well as I could. Breathing in so some calmness could govern me. — "I already said that is not the case... I wish to rest for my mood seems tricky even to myself. We shall meet again later."

I escaped the scene somehow. Bothered by the lies I decided to say to everything he asked. Later that night, I understood there was a monthly red that had arrived... but even so, my mood swings, I do not believe were only because of my femininity.

For the next four days, I had to be more careful because of it. Even remaining in my chambers most of the time. I can deduce he might feel something is not right as I have denied some of his visits due to the difficulties my period provides. Nevertheless, it ended, as it is naturally expected.

I would love to say that the next days were better... yet they weren’t.

Every day, I noticed from afar, by coincidence, how Zeleskiaz and Karina would meet or come out from some rooms together. I did not see the kind of touch he gave her in front of me that time... but his eyes followed after her more than once.

’Am I truly just imagining it?... or is it that I just do not want to admit it?’ — I have been thinking. Restlessly so.

We have been sharing time as if nothing had happened. He has been quite attentive, more courteous than he already was to begin with... yet I now feel doubts. The novel I read in my past is suddenly remembered with many details I would love to never recall.

Beautiful Pristina, aren’t these the desserts you most like? Apple they have as a filling. Are you not going to eat them? — Prince Niccolò, seductive as his character was, asked today while I am lost in these kinds of thoughts. Eating a piece right before my eyes to make sure I knew that I was losing out. — Mhm~~ You would truly love these. A wonderful taste... Would you like some or may I eat all of them on your behalf?

His playful expression did lift my mood slightly. However, the piece he took was the last one and he was already taking it to his mouth.

"Ah! No, you can’t!" — Realising it I jumped, trying to stop him.

!?... Careful my Pristina. That was dangerous.

"... Ahem. It is naughty to have all of them, Prince Niccolò." — Separating as he had laid his hand on my waist taking advantage of my impulsive lean, I cleared up my voice, ashamed of the outburst but hoping to redeem myself with a show of sympathy while speaking in his language. — I would like to have a piece, do let me have that one you have in your hands.

If the Ninth, grants myself a smile I shall comply~

The playfulness of the man did make me laugh. I appreciated the distraction and nicely asked. — I have laughed instead. Would that be enough for the prince to comply?

... Could the lady grant another laugh? I believe I was dazzled the first time. I could not enjoy the sound.

Goodness! Enough of the prince’s jests.

Sigh... The Ninth’s smile and laughter are addictive to anyone’s eye. One becomes eager before your loveliness.

He gave me the dessert in the end... but as I tasted it I glanced at the prince I would have loved to be playful with instead of Latrishk’s and to my heart’s pain... no reaction was there, what’s more, no interest could be seen in his being.

’... that laughter I just experienced..... Feels like it was a push to fall into the abyss...’ — Such a huge void opened in my heart that not one bite could forbid the nausea I developed.

One... two... three more days... we acted like nothing happened. Yet I have come to the limit on the 19th of Syvusk. For today it felt much quieter than ever. As none of us even while alone with only our chaperons joining us, neither said a word. Only Khibi was making noise to fill the silence... awkward it was, but I guess he wasn’t hoping to make it comfortable just like I was.

It started getting darker as the night conquered to finish the day. And as the moon in this cold winter sky still makes its light clear to my eye... I have come to the decision... that I do not want to keep on drowning in my own pond.

"I am tired of this." — After being quiet while petting Khibi, I blurted. Making her fly away with my dead-eyed declaration.

"Oh, Khibi?!?" — Jumping from her wing a fairy came flying back. — "Of what are you tired dear ninth???"

"Yes, ninth? What has you so tired~ oh, lovely ninth~~??"

"... it is a shameful thing to share..." — I told the two now winter fairies, Erna and Estelle, who loved staying in my chambers ever since I arrived and were now my only companions at night.

"Why??"

"Why is it shameful?"

"We won’t tell ninth!"

"That’s right ninth!! We won’t tell anyone if you ask for it~~"

"Hehehe, we keep secrets very well right Erna??"

"Teehehehe~ that’s right Estelle~~" — As if there was some kind of fun scheme they were hiding they whispered between themselves, making me sigh at their persistent dances... deciding that it was better to share it than to overthink it by myself.